Last week, we took some friends out to a new restaurant, and noticed that the waiter who took our order carried a spoon in his shirt pocket. It seemed a little strange, but I ignored it. But when the busboy brought out water and utensils, I noticed he also had a spoon in his shirt pocket, then I looked around the room and saw that all the staff had spoons in their pockets.
When the waiter came back to serve our soup I asked, "Why the spoon?"
"Well," he explained, "the restaurant's owners hired Boston Consulting, experts in efficiency, in order to revamp all our processes. After several months of statistical analysis, they concluded that the spoon was the most frequently dropped utensil. This represents a drop frequency of approximately 3 spoons per table per hour. If our personnel are prepared to deal with that contingency, we can reduce the number of trips back to the kitchen and save 15 man-hours per shift.
As luck would have it, I dropped my spoon and he was able to replace it with his spare spoon. "I'll get another spoon next time I go to the kitchen instead of making an extra trip to get it right now." I was rather impressed.
A short while later I noticed that there was a very thin string hanging out of the waiter's fly. Looking around, I noticed that all the waiters had the same string hanging from their flies. My curiosity got the better of me and before he walked off, I asked the waiter, "Excuse me, but can you tell me why you have that string right there?"
"Oh certainly!" he answered, lowering his voice. "Not everyone is as observant as you. That consulting firm I mentioned also found out that we can save time in the restroom."
"How so?" I asked.
“See," he continued, "By tying this string to the tip of your ‘you know what,’ we can pull it out over the urinal without touching it and that way eliminate the need to wash the hands, shortening the time spent in the restroom by 76.39 percent."
Curious, I asked “After you get it out, how do you put it back?"
"Well," he whispered, lowering his voice even further, "I don't know about the others, but I use the spoon."
An elderly woman hurried to the pharmacy to get medication, got back to her car, and found that she had locked her keys inside. She found an old rusty coat hanger left on the ground. She looked at it and said, “I don’t know how to use this.” She bowed her head and asked God to send her some help.
Within 5 minutes a beat-up old motorcycle pulled up, driven by a bearded man who was wearing an old biker skull rag. He got off of his cycle and asked if he could help. She replied, “Yes, my daughter is sick, and I’ve locked my keys in my car. I must get home. Please, can you use this hanger to unlock my car?”
He said, “Sure.” He walked over to the car, and in less than a minute, the car door was open.
She hugged the man and through tears, softly said, “Thank you, God, for sending me such a very nice man.”
The biker heard her little prayer and replied, “Lady, I am not a nice man. I just got out of prison yesterday; I was in prison for car theft.”
The woman hugged the man again, sobbing, “Oh, thank you, God! You even sent me a professional.”
A young boy had just gotten his driving permit. He asked his father, who was a minister, if they could discuss the use of the car. His father took him to his study & said to him, "I'll make a deal with you. You bring your grades up, study your bible a little & get your hair cut, & we'll talk about it."
After about a month, the boy came back & again asked his father if they could discuss use of the car. They again went to the father's study where his father said, "Son, I've been real proud of you. You have brought your grades up, you've studied your bible diligently, but you didn't get your hair cut!" The young man waited a moment & replied, "You know Dad, I've been thinking about that. You know, Samson had long hair, Moses had long hair, Noah had long hair, & even Jesus had long hair ..." To which his father replied, "Yes, & they WALKED every where they went too!
Comments
Wayne
Kennedys are my quest...
peacockcoins
Funny - reminded me of this one............
"When they can't find anything wrong with you, they create it!"
Throw a coin enough times, and suppose one day it lands on its edge.
Star Wars marathon on tv today...
Throw a coin enough times, and suppose one day it lands on its edge.
peacockcoins
"When they can't find anything wrong with you, they create it!"
Last week, we took some friends out to a new restaurant, and noticed that the waiter who took our order carried a spoon in his shirt pocket. It seemed a little strange, but I ignored it. But when the busboy brought out water and utensils, I noticed he also had a spoon in his shirt pocket, then I looked around the room and saw that all the staff had spoons in their pockets.
When the waiter came back to serve our soup I asked, "Why the spoon?"
"Well," he explained, "the restaurant's owners hired Boston Consulting, experts in efficiency, in order to revamp all our processes. After several months of statistical analysis, they concluded that the spoon was the most frequently dropped utensil. This represents a drop frequency of approximately 3 spoons per table per hour. If our personnel are prepared to deal with that contingency, we can reduce the number of trips back to the kitchen and save 15 man-hours per shift.
As luck would have it, I dropped my spoon and he was able to replace it with his spare spoon. "I'll get another spoon next time I go to the kitchen instead of making an extra trip to get it right now." I was rather impressed.
A short while later I noticed that there was a very thin string hanging out of the waiter's fly. Looking around, I noticed that all the waiters had the same string hanging from their flies. My curiosity got the better of me and before he walked off, I asked the waiter, "Excuse me, but can you tell me why you have that string right there?"
"Oh certainly!" he answered, lowering his voice. "Not everyone is as observant as you. That consulting firm I mentioned also found out that we can save time in the restroom."
"How so?" I asked.
“See," he continued, "By tying this string to the tip of your ‘you know what,’ we can pull it out over the urinal without touching it and that way eliminate the need to wash the hands, shortening the time spent in the restroom by 76.39 percent."
Curious, I asked “After you get it out, how do you put it back?"
"Well," he whispered, lowering his voice even further, "I don't know about the others, but I use the spoon."
I know, hence the comment. Whoever made the sign doesn’t know the difference.
Throw a coin enough times, and suppose one day it lands on its edge.
http://www.mofak.com/Full Moon Story.htm
Story about the moon over the Pacific... and a RF-4C. The picture tells it all. I don't think no can post it here.
Throw a coin enough times, and suppose one day it lands on its edge.
That looks like me whenever I try to fix anything, lol
Trap shooting your turkey takes on a whole new meaning.
Paper or plastic string included.
I found one free inside also, its petrified.
Wayne
Kennedys are my quest...
Wayne
Kennedys are my quest...
Wayne
Kennedys are my quest...
Wayne
Kennedys are my quest...
Careful.
😇
Bet that one is gone tomorrow morning
Wayne
Kennedys are my quest...
Wayne
Kennedys are my quest...
Knee high before the Fourth of July...Yup !
Now that's just plain corny.
What ? Ah shucks !
delivery to Wisconsin...? Sure, and since your there ? Hold your cheesy head high with attitude
Cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger...fresca
Santa ?
Do you need a cup ...of coco ,
Watch out for the Blue Berry Slay Bells.
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What's next ? Paint his wagon ?
Why so blue ?...Boy !
I'll be your huckelberry
An elderly woman hurried to the pharmacy to get medication, got back to her car, and found that she had locked her keys inside. She found an old rusty coat hanger left on the ground. She looked at it and said, “I don’t know how to use this.” She bowed her head and asked God to send her some help.
Within 5 minutes a beat-up old motorcycle pulled up, driven by a bearded man who was wearing an old biker skull rag. He got off of his cycle and asked if he could help. She replied, “Yes, my daughter is sick, and I’ve locked my keys in my car. I must get home. Please, can you use this hanger to unlock my car?”
He said, “Sure.” He walked over to the car, and in less than a minute, the car door was open.
She hugged the man and through tears, softly said, “Thank you, God, for sending me such a very nice man.”
The biker heard her little prayer and replied, “Lady, I am not a nice man. I just got out of prison yesterday; I was in prison for car theft.”
The woman hugged the man again, sobbing, “Oh, thank you, God! You even sent me a professional.”
A young boy had just gotten his driving permit. He asked his father, who was a minister, if they could discuss the use of the car. His father took him to his study & said to him, "I'll make a deal with you. You bring your grades up, study your bible a little & get your hair cut, & we'll talk about it."
After about a month, the boy came back & again asked his father if they could discuss use of the car. They again went to the father's study where his father said, "Son, I've been real proud of you. You have brought your grades up, you've studied your bible diligently, but you didn't get your hair cut!" The young man waited a moment & replied, "You know Dad, I've been thinking about that. You know, Samson had long hair, Moses had long hair, Noah had long hair, & even Jesus had long hair ..." To which his father replied, "Yes, & they WALKED every where they went too!
Cheers, RickO
Pete
How to catch a baseball...
U.S. Type Set
Cheers, RickO
Yep... it happens just like that... Cheers, RickO
peacockcoins
Wayne
Kennedys are my quest...
Wayne
Kennedys are my quest...
Credit Mr. Lewis Black.
It's well know that amateurs built the ark and professionals constructed the Titanic.
How many licks did it take you to destroy my desert. Spike ? Go lay down.
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Successful transactions with : MICHAELDIXON, Manorcourtman, Bochiman, bolivarshagnasty, AUandAG, onlyroosies, chumley, Weiss, jdimmick, BAJJERFAN, gene1978, TJM965, Smittys, GRANDAM, JTHawaii, mainejoe, softparade, derryb
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Help Wanted
Ghost writer and Ghost reader for medical researching team with editing skills.
@emeraldATV No Fresca! Pepsi?