Have you ever noticed when you are young you drive fast and hug the white line, and when you are older you think you're running fast, about 45, and hugging the yellow line?
A priest, a rabbi and a Buddhist monk get arrested for illegal gambling. They get in front of the judge. He starts questioning the priest first, "Did you play poker yesterday?" The priest mumbles a quick 'Lord forgive me' and answered "No." The judge turns to the rabbi and asks him, "Did you play poker yesterday?" The rabbi crosses his fingers behind his back and answers a clear "No." Finally the judge turns to the Buddhist monk and tells him, "So you are a Buddhist monk, I know for a fact that you are absolutely forbidden to lie to me! Did YOU play poker yesterday?" The monk looks at the priest, then at the rabbi. He smiles at the judge and asks "How could I possibly play poker all by myself?"
A New York attorney representing a wealthy art collector called and asked to speak to his client. "Saul, I have some good news and I have some bad news." The art collector replied, "You know, I've had an awful day, Jack, so let's hear the good news first." The lawyer said, "Well, I met with your wife today, and she informed me that she has invested only $5,000 in two very nice pictures that she thinks will bring somewhere between $15 and $20 million... and I think she could be right." Saul replied enthusiastically, "Holy cow! Well done! My wife is a brilliant business woman, isn't she? You've just made my day. Now, I know I can handle the bad news. What is it?" "The pictures are of you and your secretary."
We live in Massachusetts, and are in Florida for 6 weeks.
I take my wife Mary out for a few drinks, she likes the ones that
are colorful in tall glasses and have the little umbrellas. She did
complain to me the bartender shut her off while I was talking to
a friend, so I did ask her why - and this is what she said .......
Comments
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Cheers, RickO
Cheers, RickO
Cheers, RickO
Cheers, RickO
Successful transactions with : MICHAELDIXON, Manorcourtman, Bochiman, bolivarshagnasty, AUandAG, onlyroosies, chumley, Weiss, jdimmick, BAJJERFAN, gene1978, TJM965, Smittys, GRANDAM, JTHawaii, mainejoe, softparade, derryb
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Cheers, RickO
Successful transactions with : MICHAELDIXON, Manorcourtman, Bochiman, bolivarshagnasty, AUandAG, onlyroosies, chumley, Weiss, jdimmick, BAJJERFAN, gene1978, TJM965, Smittys, GRANDAM, JTHawaii, mainejoe, softparade, derryb
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Mike Rowe ofcourse 😉
🎶 shout shout, let it all out 🎶
Have you ever noticed when you are young you drive fast and hug the white line, and when you are older you think you're running fast, about 45, and hugging the yellow line?
Cheers, RickO
A priest, a rabbi and a Buddhist monk get arrested for illegal gambling. They get in front of the judge. He starts questioning the priest first, "Did you play poker yesterday?" The priest mumbles a quick 'Lord forgive me' and answered "No." The judge turns to the rabbi and asks him, "Did you play poker yesterday?" The rabbi crosses his fingers behind his back and answers a clear "No." Finally the judge turns to the Buddhist monk and tells him, "So you are a Buddhist monk, I know for a fact that you are absolutely forbidden to lie to me! Did YOU play poker yesterday?" The monk looks at the priest, then at the rabbi. He smiles at the judge and asks "How could I possibly play poker all by myself?"
A New York attorney representing a wealthy art collector called and asked to speak to his client. "Saul, I have some good news and I have some bad news." The art collector replied, "You know, I've had an awful day, Jack, so let's hear the good news first." The lawyer said, "Well, I met with your wife today, and she informed me that she has invested only $5,000 in two very nice pictures that she thinks will bring somewhere between $15 and $20 million... and I think she could be right." Saul replied enthusiastically, "Holy cow! Well done! My wife is a brilliant business woman, isn't she? You've just made my day. Now, I know I can handle the bad news. What is it?" "The pictures are of you and your secretary."
Wayne
Kennedys are my quest...
Wayne
Kennedys are my quest...
Successful transactions with : MICHAELDIXON, Manorcourtman, Bochiman, bolivarshagnasty, AUandAG, onlyroosies, chumley, Weiss, jdimmick, BAJJERFAN, gene1978, TJM965, Smittys, GRANDAM, JTHawaii, mainejoe, softparade, derryb
Bad transactions with : nobody to date
We live in Massachusetts, and are in Florida for 6 weeks.
I take my wife Mary out for a few drinks, she likes the ones that
are colorful in tall glasses and have the little umbrellas. She did
complain to me the bartender shut her off while I was talking to
a friend, so I did ask her why - and this is what she said .......
"When they can't find anything wrong with you, they create it!"
A little more of my wife's sarcasm .....
john hurt i'd imagine.
JINX...
Your alabama slammer sir.
Tyrking Abe.
Successful transactions with : MICHAELDIXON, Manorcourtman, Bochiman, bolivarshagnasty, AUandAG, onlyroosies, chumley, Weiss, jdimmick, BAJJERFAN, gene1978, TJM965, Smittys, GRANDAM, JTHawaii, mainejoe, softparade, derryb
Bad transactions with : nobody to date
Full disclosure, I'm neither a Red Sox fan nor a Yankees fan
Cheers, RickO
My Wife Mary Got Confused Over This News .....
Do you know on the Canary Islands there is not one Canary?
And on the Virgin Islands?
Same thing.
Not one canary.
Wayne
Kennedys are my quest...
Wayne
Kennedys are my quest...
Wayne
Kennedys are my quest...
Successful transactions with : MICHAELDIXON, Manorcourtman, Bochiman, bolivarshagnasty, AUandAG, onlyroosies, chumley, Weiss, jdimmick, BAJJERFAN, gene1978, TJM965, Smittys, GRANDAM, JTHawaii, mainejoe, softparade, derryb
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Pete
Cheers, RickO
Successful transactions with : MICHAELDIXON, Manorcourtman, Bochiman, bolivarshagnasty, AUandAG, onlyroosies, chumley, Weiss, jdimmick, BAJJERFAN, gene1978, TJM965, Smittys, GRANDAM, JTHawaii, mainejoe, softparade, derryb
Bad transactions with : nobody to date
I am afraid that I am getting nearer to this point.
Wayne
Kennedys are my quest...
Wayne
Kennedys are my quest...
Wayne
Kennedys are my quest...
"When they can't find anything wrong with you, they create it!"
How old I feel inside
The truth
🎶 shout shout, let it all out 🎶
Successful transactions with : MICHAELDIXON, Manorcourtman, Bochiman, bolivarshagnasty, AUandAG, onlyroosies, chumley, Weiss, jdimmick, BAJJERFAN, gene1978, TJM965, Smittys, GRANDAM, JTHawaii, mainejoe, softparade, derryb
Bad transactions with : nobody to date
More Of My Wife's Wisdom.....
That's rare - a Calico male. Sure it isn't a she?
Here’s the correct heading and this came from the cat forum. Still can’t tell by the name but I’m guessing female
🎶 shout shout, let it all out 🎶
Successful transactions with : MICHAELDIXON, Manorcourtman, Bochiman, bolivarshagnasty, AUandAG, onlyroosies, chumley, Weiss, jdimmick, BAJJERFAN, gene1978, TJM965, Smittys, GRANDAM, JTHawaii, mainejoe, softparade, derryb
Bad transactions with : nobody to date
Sweet,
a nut cracker...
hah, hah, Wipeout _/ _/