Three women are about to be executed. One''s a brunette, one''s a redhead, and one''s a blonde. The guard brings the brunette forward and the executioner asks if she has any last requests. She says no, and the executioner shouts, "Ready! Aim!"
Suddenly the brunette yells, "EARTHQUAKE!!!"
Everyone is startled and throws themselves on the ground while she escapes.
The guard brings the redhead forward and the executioner asks if she has any last requests. She say no, and the executioner shouts, "Ready! Aim!"
Suddenly the redhead yells, "TORNADO!!!"
Everyone is startled and looks around for cover while she escapes.
By now the blonde has it all figured out. The guard brings her forward and the executioner asks if she has any last requests. She says no, and the executioner shouts, "Ready! Aim!"
Hey so heads up... I wasn’t allowed to say anything before today, but now it’s ok for me to share. A little nervous, but on Sunday I volunteered for the vaccine trials for Covid-19. I wanted to get it done before Thanksgiving. The vaccine is one that was created by Pfizer and developed in Russia. I received my first shot yesterday around 7 pm, and I wanted to let you all know that it’s completely safe, with иo side effects whatsoeveя, and that I feelshκι χoρoshό я чувствую себя немного странно и я думаю, что вытащил ослиные уши.
The bitterness of "Poor Quality" is remembered long after the sweetness of low price is forgotten.
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@Onastone said:
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I bet one of the dogs is named "Muffins".
Worry is the interest you pay on a debt you may not owe.
Voltaire: Paper money eventually returns to its intrinsic value---zero.
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"I’m fixin to blow it up": Bathroom warning mistaken for bomb threat"
WICHITA, Kan. (KWCH) — A report of a bomb threat at a Home Depot store in Kansas turned out to be a big misunderstanding.
Someone at the store in Wichita called 911 after a customer reported they had overheard the threat in the store’s restroom.
“We just had a customer here made what may have been a bomb threat,” said the caller. “He said, uh, somebody told me there’s a bomb in here and you need to leave the building. He said it three times.”
Police did some investigating and learned the “bomb threat” came from a man in a bathroom stall warning others about the severity of his need to use the restroom, CBS affiliate KWCH reported.
“You all need to get out of here because I’m fixin’ to blow it up,” he was heard to say.
One witness said he laughed at the remark and took it as a joke.
@crazyhounddog said:
Hey so heads up... I wasn’t allowed to say anything before today, but now it’s ok for me to share. A little nervous, but on Sunday I volunteered for the vaccine trials for Covid-19. I wanted to get it done before Thanksgiving. The vaccine is one that was created by Pfizer and developed in Russia. I received my first shot yesterday around 7 pm, and I wanted to let you all know that it’s completely safe, with иo side effects whatsoeveя, and that I feelshκι χoρoshό я чувствую себя немного странно и я думаю, что вытащил ослиные уши.
Comments
So you're a creepy old man?
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Just a little bit.
Beware of the shadow!
"A dog breaks your heart only one time and that is when they pass on". Unknown
Death Row in Women's Prison
Three women are about to be executed. One''s a brunette, one''s a redhead, and one''s a blonde. The guard brings the brunette forward and the executioner asks if she has any last requests. She says no, and the executioner shouts, "Ready! Aim!"
Suddenly the brunette yells, "EARTHQUAKE!!!"
Everyone is startled and throws themselves on the ground while she escapes.
The guard brings the redhead forward and the executioner asks if she has any last requests. She say no, and the executioner shouts, "Ready! Aim!"
Suddenly the redhead yells, "TORNADO!!!"
Everyone is startled and looks around for cover while she escapes.
By now the blonde has it all figured out. The guard brings her forward and the executioner asks if she has any last requests. She says no, and the executioner shouts, "Ready! Aim!"
And the blonde yells,!!!" "FIRE
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Bad transactions with : nobody to date
A turkey walks into a bar, the bartender asks, "What are you?"
The turkey replies, "I’m a wild turkey."
The bartender chuckles and replies, "Hey, we have a drink named after you."
The wild turkey, incredulous, asks, "You have a drink named Kevin?!"
Successful transactions with : MICHAELDIXON, Manorcourtman, Bochiman, bolivarshagnasty, AUandAG, onlyroosies, chumley, Weiss, jdimmick, BAJJERFAN, gene1978, TJM965, Smittys, GRANDAM, JTHawaii, mainejoe, softparade, derryb
Bad transactions with : nobody to date
Cheers, RickO
Cheers, RickO
Pete
Here's a warning parable for coin collectors...
.
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Bad transactions with : nobody to date
Successful transactions with : MICHAELDIXON, Manorcourtman, Bochiman, bolivarshagnasty, AUandAG, onlyroosies, chumley, Weiss, jdimmick, BAJJERFAN, gene1978, TJM965, Smittys, GRANDAM, JTHawaii, mainejoe, softparade, derryb
Bad transactions with : nobody to date
It's not a drink. It's a brand of liquor.
I've seen it 3 times in this thread alone.
That jokes older than topstuff.
Hey so heads up... I wasn’t allowed to say anything before today, but now it’s ok for me to share. A little nervous, but on Sunday I volunteered for the vaccine trials for Covid-19. I wanted to get it done before Thanksgiving. The vaccine is one that was created by Pfizer and developed in Russia. I received my first shot yesterday around 7 pm, and I wanted to let you all know that it’s completely safe, with иo side effects whatsoeveя, and that I feelshκι χoρoshό я чувствую себя немного странно и я думаю, что вытащил ослиные уши.
Successful transactions with : MICHAELDIXON, Manorcourtman, Bochiman, bolivarshagnasty, AUandAG, onlyroosies, chumley, Weiss, jdimmick, BAJJERFAN, gene1978, TJM965, Smittys, GRANDAM, JTHawaii, mainejoe, softparade, derryb
Bad transactions with : nobody to date
Don't you just hate it when they nail you on the shipping...
https://www.ebay.com/itm/1978-Jeff-Nickel-broadstruck-MINT-ERROR-ERROR/184553556895?hash=item2af83fcb9f:g:wkAAAOSwjQRfqC3D
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Thank you. When @Onastone posted the above in another thread I just laughed!!
I bet one of the dogs is named "Muffins".
Worry is the interest you pay on a debt you may not owe.
Voltaire: Paper money eventually returns to its intrinsic value---zero.
Yeah, the center one!
The toilet is smoking!!!! The toilet is smoking!!!!!
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.
.
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He ain't going to be smiling later.
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"I’m fixin to blow it up": Bathroom warning mistaken for bomb threat"
WICHITA, Kan. (KWCH) — A report of a bomb threat at a Home Depot store in Kansas turned out to be a big misunderstanding.
Someone at the store in Wichita called 911 after a customer reported they had overheard the threat in the store’s restroom.
“We just had a customer here made what may have been a bomb threat,” said the caller. “He said, uh, somebody told me there’s a bomb in here and you need to leave the building. He said it three times.”
Police did some investigating and learned the “bomb threat” came from a man in a bathroom stall warning others about the severity of his need to use the restroom, CBS affiliate KWCH reported.
“You all need to get out of here because I’m fixin’ to blow it up,” he was heard to say.
One witness said he laughed at the remark and took it as a joke.
https://dfw.cbslocal.com/2019/02/14/im-fixin-to-blow-it-up-bathroom-warning-mistaken-for-bomb-threat-at-home-depot/
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How do you know it's a He?
Because there's no doily thing on top or air fresheners.
Great transactions with oih82w8, JasonGaming, Moose1913.
Carrots on the table anyone?
Happy Thanksgiving
Pete
Happy Thanksgiving
Dave
You have no IDEA how bad I want to say that!! 🙂
Where's the 8 track?? 🙂
That was grandpa's first wife. "She is out of the picture now."
Dave
Covid 19??
Are you REALLY man's best friend?
"A dog breaks your heart only one time and that is when they pass on". Unknown
"A dog breaks your heart only one time and that is when they pass on". Unknown
˙ʇɹodǝɹ oʇ sǝnssı ou ɹɐɟ os ˙ǝuıɔɔɐʌ ǝɥʇ ǝɯ ǝʌɐƃ ʎǝɥʇ uǝɥʍ ɐılɐɹʇsnɐ uı sɐʍ ı ˙ʇɐɥʇ uoıʇuǝɯ plnoɥs noʎ ʎuunɟ s,ʇɐɥʇ
"A dog breaks your heart only one time and that is when they pass on". Unknown
Lafayette Grading Set