A married man confessed he always read his wife's horoscope in
the newspaper to find out what kind of day he was going to have.
A man walked into an auto parts store and asked if they sold
dipsticks. Turns out, he needed something longer because the
one that came with his car didn't reach his oil anymore.
Next time you're sitting someplace public and a stranger sits down
next to you, stare straight ahead and ask, in a hushed tone, "Did
you bring the money?"
When you ask me what I'm doing today, and I say, "Nothing," that
doesn't mean I'm free. It means I'm doing NOTHING. Period!
I recently spent $6,500 on a young registered Black Angus bull. I put him out with the herd, but he just ate grass and wouldn't even look at a cow. I was beginning to think I had paid more for that bull than he was worth.
Anyhow, I had the Vet come and have a look at him. He said the bull was very healthy, but possibly just a little young, so he gave me some pills to feed him once per day.
The bull started to service some of the cows right away, and within two days, all my cows! He even broke through the fence and bred with all of my neighbor's cows.
He's like a machine!
I don't know what was in the pills the Vet gave him…but they sorta taste like peppermint...
Worry is the interest you pay on a debt you may not owe.
"Paper money eventually returns to its intrinsic value---zero."----Voltaire
"Everything you say should be true, but not everything true should be said."----Voltaire
USAF (Ret) 1974 - 1994 - The inherent vice of capitalism is the unequal sharing of blessings; the inherent virtue of socialism is the equal sharing of miseries. Remembering RickO, a brother in arms.
A recent article in the Kentucky Post reported that a woman,
Anne Maynard, has sued St. Luke's Hospital, saying that after
her husband had surgery there, he lost all interest in sex.
A hospital spokesman replied:
"Mr. Maynard was admitted for cataract surgery. All we
did was correct his eyesight."
Comments
Wayne
Kennedys are my quest...
Cheers, RickO
Successful transactions with : MICHAELDIXON, Manorcourtman, Bochiman, bolivarshagnasty, AUandAG, onlyroosies, chumley, Weiss, jdimmick, BAJJERFAN, gene1978, TJM965, Smittys, GRANDAM, JTHawaii, mainejoe, softparade, derryb
Bad transactions with : nobody to date
A married man confessed he always read his wife's horoscope in
the newspaper to find out what kind of day he was going to have.
A man walked into an auto parts store and asked if they sold
dipsticks. Turns out, he needed something longer because the
one that came with his car didn't reach his oil anymore.
Next time you're sitting someplace public and a stranger sits down
next to you, stare straight ahead and ask, in a hushed tone, "Did
you bring the money?"
When you ask me what I'm doing today, and I say, "Nothing," that
doesn't mean I'm free. It means I'm doing NOTHING. Period!
Pete
I recently spent $6,500 on a young registered Black Angus bull. I put him out with the herd, but he just ate grass and wouldn't even look at a cow. I was beginning to think I had paid more for that bull than he was worth.
Anyhow, I had the Vet come and have a look at him. He said the bull was very healthy, but possibly just a little young, so he gave me some pills to feed him once per day.
The bull started to service some of the cows right away, and within two days, all my cows! He even broke through the fence and bred with all of my neighbor's cows.
He's like a machine!
I don't know what was in the pills the Vet gave him…but they sorta taste like peppermint...
U.S. Type Set
Successful transactions with : MICHAELDIXON, Manorcourtman, Bochiman, bolivarshagnasty, AUandAG, onlyroosies, chumley, Weiss, jdimmick, BAJJERFAN, gene1978, TJM965, Smittys, GRANDAM, JTHawaii, mainejoe, softparade, derryb
Bad transactions with : nobody to date
"When they can't find anything wrong with you, they create it!"
Successful transactions with : MICHAELDIXON, Manorcourtman, Bochiman, bolivarshagnasty, AUandAG, onlyroosies, chumley, Weiss, jdimmick, BAJJERFAN, gene1978, TJM965, Smittys, GRANDAM, JTHawaii, mainejoe, softparade, derryb
Bad transactions with : nobody to date
Is tin magnetic?
Worry is the interest you pay on a debt you may not owe.
"Paper money eventually returns to its intrinsic value---zero."----Voltaire
"Everything you say should be true, but not everything true should be said."----Voltaire
Tin is paramagnetic—it is very weakly attracted to a magnet.
Successful transactions with : MICHAELDIXON, Manorcourtman, Bochiman, bolivarshagnasty, AUandAG, onlyroosies, chumley, Weiss, jdimmick, BAJJERFAN, gene1978, TJM965, Smittys, GRANDAM, JTHawaii, mainejoe, softparade, derryb
Bad transactions with : nobody to date
Successful transactions with : MICHAELDIXON, Manorcourtman, Bochiman, bolivarshagnasty, AUandAG, onlyroosies, chumley, Weiss, jdimmick, BAJJERFAN, gene1978, TJM965, Smittys, GRANDAM, JTHawaii, mainejoe, softparade, derryb
Bad transactions with : nobody to date
Cheers, RickO
Ain't that the dang truth.
You forgot pissah.
USAF (Ret) 1974 - 1994 - The inherent vice of capitalism is the unequal sharing of blessings; the inherent virtue of socialism is the equal sharing of miseries. Remembering RickO, a brother in arms.
It's wicked pissah.. duh
Yo ?
You got peanut butter on my chocolate. Hmm ($).
Your Honor,
I don't see a traffic light in the red position and it could have been the other guy in front of me who triggered this ticket.
Wayne
Kennedys are my quest...
Wayne
Kennedys are my quest...
Wayne
Kennedys are my quest...
Wayne
Kennedys are my quest...
A recent article in the Kentucky Post reported that a woman,
Anne Maynard, has sued St. Luke's Hospital, saying that after
her husband had surgery there, he lost all interest in sex.
A hospital spokesman replied:
"Mr. Maynard was admitted for cataract surgery. All we
did was correct his eyesight."
U.S. Type Set
"When they can't find anything wrong with you, they create it!"
"When they can't find anything wrong with you, they create it!"
.
Successful transactions with : MICHAELDIXON, Manorcourtman, Bochiman, bolivarshagnasty, AUandAG, onlyroosies, chumley, Weiss, jdimmick, BAJJERFAN, gene1978, TJM965, Smittys, GRANDAM, JTHawaii, mainejoe, softparade, derryb
Bad transactions with : nobody to date
Can't remember if posted or not.
How true!
RIP Mom- 1932-2012
"When they can't find anything wrong with you, they create it!"
Successful transactions with : MICHAELDIXON, Manorcourtman, Bochiman, bolivarshagnasty, AUandAG, onlyroosies, chumley, Weiss, jdimmick, BAJJERFAN, gene1978, TJM965, Smittys, GRANDAM, JTHawaii, mainejoe, softparade, derryb
Bad transactions with : nobody to date
Ok, so I made the scale to weigh coins. So, where does it show you the weight ?
Only the Shadow knows.
Successful transactions with : MICHAELDIXON, Manorcourtman, Bochiman, bolivarshagnasty, AUandAG, onlyroosies, chumley, Weiss, jdimmick, BAJJERFAN, gene1978, TJM965, Smittys, GRANDAM, JTHawaii, mainejoe, softparade, derryb
Bad transactions with : nobody to date
When your son tests you as a target, oops!😆
Wayne
Kennedys are my quest...