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"Good Morning Class" The Pirates of the Coinibbean -- Part 3
Clankeye
Posts: 3,928 ✭
Somewhere in the Coinibbean, The POS and Captain Hallatio Coinblower plow through troubled water. The wind through the stays makes a high lonesome sound, and Captain and crew are irritable from day after day on an unforgiving sea. Coinblower has assembled all hands on deck...
Captain Coinblower: (crazed look in his eyes) MEN! ...It has come to my attention that one of our own... is a liar AND A FRAUD!
All: (angry) Haaarrrrr!!
Captain Coinblower: This man betrays US ALL!!!!!
All: (angrier) HAAAAARRRRRR!!!!!
Captain Coinblower: IT IS TREACHERY MOST FOUL!!!!
All: (angriest) HAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRR!!!!!!!
Bingo Baily: 'Ou is it, Captain!!!!
Nucklehead: Keel haul 'em!
Captain Coinblower (frenzied) The traitor is none other than... (he points his cutlass) TWODOGS!!!!!!
The crew gasps! All move away from TwoDogs, leaving him standing alone in the middle of the deck. He is making a pretty little braid in his beard, he seems unconcerned
Keifer the Cabinboy: Murderer!!
Mr. Numobri: KILL 'EM!!!!
Lucille Le Bop: Off with the Frankies!
Mister Kranky: CAPTAIN! What crime has this man committed?
Captain Coinblower: Crime? ...crime (wiping spittle from his chin) ...he has lied to us all.
Mister Kranky: How so, sir?
Captain Coinblower: Kiefer the Cabinboy has told me... as he tells me everything (patting Kiefer's head) good lad... TWODOGS HAS NOT TWODOGS!!!! HE HAS THREE DOGS!!!!!!!
Silence
Mister Kranky: Um... Captain...
Captain Coinblower: (glaring at TwoDogs) What?
Mister Kranky: How long we been at sea now?
Captain Coinblower: (snapping) What could it possibly matter!?
Mister Kranky: (backing away) You're right, no bearing on anything...
From up in the Crow's Nest Mr. Wingedliberty shouts at the top of his lungs
Mr. Wingedliberty: CAPTAIN!!!! CAPTAIN!!!! THERE'S A SHIP!!!!
The entire crew runs to the railing. The POS begins to list heavily to port.
MrKelso: Is it The Jade?????!!!!!
Outhaul: BATTLE STATIONS CAPTAIN???!!!!
Mr. Arco: AAAAARRRRRR!
Coinblower looks feverishly through his spyglass. The Ship is large and closing fast under full sail--
Captain Coinblower: BE READY MEN!!!!!
Details begin to show. The Sails are handsome. The davits of the ship glisten as if made of gold...
Captain Coinblower: IT'S THE.... IT'S THE---
The Ship is painted in vibrant, multi-color, monster rainbow tones--
Captain Coinblower: (snapping shut his spyglass--standing dejected)
Blast his eyes... it's The Anaconda.
The marvelous ship is now within eye sight of the entire crew of The POS. It is a glorious vessel--with only the finest fittings, a string quartet playing on the aft deck, and Captain Adrian Crane smiling and waving, with his arm around his first mate, Miss Stephanie....
The crew of The POS silently watch The Anaconda as it glides by, slowly becoming nothing more than a speck on the horizon.
Kiefer the Cabinboy: Gosh! What a cool ship, Captain!
Captain Coinblower: (blank stare) Shut up.
LATER THAT NIGHT COINBLOWER TALKS TO DR. POOLE
Captain Coinblower: Explain it to me again, Poole!
Dr. Poole: You see Captain, Twodogs doesn't necessarily have to have two dogs. Any more than Corkkarl is made of cork... or Mister Coinguy is actually a coin...
Coinblower: But, his name is Twodogs--blast! His name is TwoDogs!!
Dr. Poole: Yes, I know sir. But, do you blow coins, Captain Coinblower? --don't answer that.
Coinblower: If his name is Twodogs--he should have two dogs! If he indeed has three, I demand one be rolled into a small ball and shot out of a cannon.
Dr. Poole: A reasonable request, sir. But, how about for now we just concentrate on finding The Jade Coin?
Coinblower: (thinking) ---that ship is actually made of real jade, right?
Dr. Poole: (touching the bridge of his nose) D-oh.
Captain Coinblower: (crazed look in his eyes) MEN! ...It has come to my attention that one of our own... is a liar AND A FRAUD!
All: (angry) Haaarrrrr!!
Captain Coinblower: This man betrays US ALL!!!!!
All: (angrier) HAAAAARRRRRR!!!!!
Captain Coinblower: IT IS TREACHERY MOST FOUL!!!!
All: (angriest) HAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRR!!!!!!!
Bingo Baily: 'Ou is it, Captain!!!!
Nucklehead: Keel haul 'em!
Captain Coinblower (frenzied) The traitor is none other than... (he points his cutlass) TWODOGS!!!!!!
The crew gasps! All move away from TwoDogs, leaving him standing alone in the middle of the deck. He is making a pretty little braid in his beard, he seems unconcerned
Keifer the Cabinboy: Murderer!!
Mr. Numobri: KILL 'EM!!!!
Lucille Le Bop: Off with the Frankies!
Mister Kranky: CAPTAIN! What crime has this man committed?
Captain Coinblower: Crime? ...crime (wiping spittle from his chin) ...he has lied to us all.
Mister Kranky: How so, sir?
Captain Coinblower: Kiefer the Cabinboy has told me... as he tells me everything (patting Kiefer's head) good lad... TWODOGS HAS NOT TWODOGS!!!! HE HAS THREE DOGS!!!!!!!
Silence
Mister Kranky: Um... Captain...
Captain Coinblower: (glaring at TwoDogs) What?
Mister Kranky: How long we been at sea now?
Captain Coinblower: (snapping) What could it possibly matter!?
Mister Kranky: (backing away) You're right, no bearing on anything...
From up in the Crow's Nest Mr. Wingedliberty shouts at the top of his lungs
Mr. Wingedliberty: CAPTAIN!!!! CAPTAIN!!!! THERE'S A SHIP!!!!
The entire crew runs to the railing. The POS begins to list heavily to port.
MrKelso: Is it The Jade?????!!!!!
Outhaul: BATTLE STATIONS CAPTAIN???!!!!
Mr. Arco: AAAAARRRRRR!
Coinblower looks feverishly through his spyglass. The Ship is large and closing fast under full sail--
Captain Coinblower: BE READY MEN!!!!!
Details begin to show. The Sails are handsome. The davits of the ship glisten as if made of gold...
Captain Coinblower: IT'S THE.... IT'S THE---
The Ship is painted in vibrant, multi-color, monster rainbow tones--
Captain Coinblower: (snapping shut his spyglass--standing dejected)
Blast his eyes... it's The Anaconda.
The marvelous ship is now within eye sight of the entire crew of The POS. It is a glorious vessel--with only the finest fittings, a string quartet playing on the aft deck, and Captain Adrian Crane smiling and waving, with his arm around his first mate, Miss Stephanie....
The crew of The POS silently watch The Anaconda as it glides by, slowly becoming nothing more than a speck on the horizon.
Kiefer the Cabinboy: Gosh! What a cool ship, Captain!
Captain Coinblower: (blank stare) Shut up.
LATER THAT NIGHT COINBLOWER TALKS TO DR. POOLE
Captain Coinblower: Explain it to me again, Poole!
Dr. Poole: You see Captain, Twodogs doesn't necessarily have to have two dogs. Any more than Corkkarl is made of cork... or Mister Coinguy is actually a coin...
Coinblower: But, his name is Twodogs--blast! His name is TwoDogs!!
Dr. Poole: Yes, I know sir. But, do you blow coins, Captain Coinblower? --don't answer that.
Coinblower: If his name is Twodogs--he should have two dogs! If he indeed has three, I demand one be rolled into a small ball and shot out of a cannon.
Dr. Poole: A reasonable request, sir. But, how about for now we just concentrate on finding The Jade Coin?
Coinblower: (thinking) ---that ship is actually made of real jade, right?
Dr. Poole: (touching the bridge of his nose) D-oh.
Brevity is the soul of wit. --William Shakespeare
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Comments
'Tis Monday at last!
Total Copper Nutcase - African, British Ships, Channel Islands!!!
'Do not meddle in the affairs of dragons, for you are crunchy and taste good with ketchup'
Harrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr!!!!!!!!!!!
Haaaarrr....Clankeye me boy, ye make a fine bard.
Jade Rare Coin eBay Listings
I'd have thought, that between Coinblower and Crane, many, many words would have been exchanged, about something or other.
I always suspected that Stephanie might be (how shall I say it?)..... other than she appeared.
Edited to add: Oh great, you changed it from "Mr. Stephanie" to "Miss Stephanie". Now I'm REALLY confused.
Regards,
Wayne
Wayne
www.waynedriskillminiatures.com
<< <i>Keifer the Cabinboy: Murderer!!
Mr. Numbori: KILL 'EM!!!!
Lucille Le Bop: Off with the Frankies!
>>
Man, when I got to this part, I was eating a hot dog and I gagged.
<< <i>Captain Coinblower: Keifer the Cabinboy has told me... as he tells me everything (patting Keifer's head) good lad... >>
Who is Keifer?
Cameron Kiefer
don't know, but he has a funny tail
<< <i>Captain Adrian Crane smiling and waving, with his arm around his first mate, Miss Stephanie.... >>
I'd imagine Mrs. Captain Crane, a beautiful lass in her own right, might pow him right in the Frankies if she found out about that....
Good to hear from you, Clank!
Joe
"Ask, and it shall be given you; seek, and ye shall find; knock, and it shall be opened unto you." -Luke 11:9
"Hear, O Israel: The LORD our God is one LORD: And thou shalt love the LORD thy God with all thine heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy might." -Deut. 6:4-5
"For the LORD is our judge, the LORD is our lawgiver, the LORD is our king; He will save us." -Isaiah 33:22
HAAAAARRRRRR!!!!! Don't even think it!
Doggedly collecting coins of the Central American Republic.
Visit the Society of US Pattern Collectors at USPatterns.com.
He did Barry. Right at the end of the first scene he had us all swaying back and forth
as if we were on the POS itself. Big score there Bob.
"Senorita HepKitty"
"I want a real cool Kitty from Hepcat City, to stay in step with me" - Bill Carter
09/07/2006
Just for ol' Clank?
Carl
Great job, Clank! See what you can do with Coinblower for me!
Here's a warning parable for coin collectors...
We'll use our hands and hearts and if we must we'll use our heads.
09/07/2006
I wish I had included Mister Gsaguy in this episode. Leaping off The POS and swimming madly toward The Anaconda screaming "Stephanie!!!!!!"
As everyone watched from the deck, he could have slipped below the waves... never to be seen again (sob).
Alas, poor gsaguy.
Where is he lately anyway?
09/07/2006
Big Mike <><
Let your roots grow down into him and draw up nourishment from him, so you will grow in faith, strong and vigorous in the truth you were taught. Let your lives overflow with thanksgiving for all that he has done. --Colossians 2:7
Marc
Haaarrrrrr,tis a fine Monday,i feel better already.
Another great job CLANK,thank you.
Another classic...
Liberty: Parent of Science & Industry
Mojo
-Jim Morrison-
Mr. Mojorizn
my blog:www.numistories.com
-Amanda
I'm a YN working on a type set!
My Buffalo Nickel Website Home of the Quirky Buffaloes Collection!
Proud member of the CUFYNA
...........
Solution a blow up doll, gender your choice. Don't forget alot of vinyl repair kits.
And how might anyone know that TwoDogs had three dogs? You'd think from the name he had two dogs,eh?
And of course it wouldn't likely come up on the bourse or at a coin auction.
AAAARRRRRR........