"Good Morning Class" 7 - The Movie
Clankeye
Posts: 3,928 ✭
Mrs. Coinboard: Good morning class!
All: Good morning Mrs. Coinboard!
Mrs. CB: Class, today we have a special treat! These wonderful people from Hollywood are here to film a movie all about the class!
All: YEA!!!!!!!!!!!
Mrs. CB: Now class, I'm going to turn it over to Sweaty Coinberg, director of our favorite movie: "ET: the Extra Testicle."
Sweaty Coinberg: (through megaphone) Yeah, hello there, class! What we're doing here is filming a new episode of my hit series "Trolling for Dollars!" This episode is titled: "Coins and Girlfriends--a Deadly Mix!" And stars Sven Coinnery as the corpse of your very own Cameron Kiefer. Now, we have some big stars here, boys and girls... we've got Mrs. Doubtfire playin' the Coinbroad and Flint Wormwood here as Russ, so let's start filming from the top... and... ACTION!!!!
The camera pans to Mrs. Doubtfire at the head of the class, dressed like Mrs. Coinboard
Mrs. Doubtfire: Oh... oh, hello dears...
Sweaty Coinberg: Say the line!
Mrs. Doubtfire: Oh.. oh, yes. Good morning class, dears!
1907Quarter: Hey, she didn't do it right!
Sweaty Coinberg: Stuff it kid, we're rolling! Well... answer her, peckerwoods!
All: (stiffly) Good morn-ing Mrs. Coin-board.
Sweaty: Okay! Great stuff! Now... Flint give 'em your line as that Russ kid....
Flint Wormwood: Got proof JFK's?... well... do ya, PUNK?!
Sweaty: Cut! Cut! Flint, baby, bubby... just say the line. "Got JFK's?"
Flint: But that's not what he says! I studied this kid. He says (in a nany-nany voice) "Got proof JFK's?" And don’t call me Russ. I wanna be called Rock—Rock Compucheap! Russ is too close to Rusty… that ain't Flint Wormwood style...
Sweaty: Fine! Would you say the line please... "Rock?!"
Flint: (striking a match off the top of Leothelyon's head, puffing a cigar and squinting) Got JFK's?
Mrs. Doubtfire: Oh... oh dear... is-- is the smaller bus operating for you, Rusty-- I mean Rock!
Sweaty: Cut! CUT! "Is the short bus working for you?" Is it so hard?!! Short! Sweet! (claps) Keep goin'-- time is money people!
The door to the classroom bursts open and in struts Mr. T playing a2labmom. He carries the body of Cameron Kiefer in his arms
Mr. T: Say Fools! Look what I found in the yard! Looks like the body of that buddin' young Romeo, Cameron Kiefer! I told the Fool... don't be messin' with no girls!
KoinKollector: Oh my God!!!! Somebody get a CoinDr.!!!!!!!!!
All: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!! (they pelt him savagely with lunchmeat and vegetables)
Sweaty: Excellent! Now lay the body on Coinboard's desk! Keep rolling!
The camera follows Mr. T as he plops the body of young Kiefer on the desk. Famous actor Tussle Crowe playing Fairlaneman approaches
Tussle Crowe: He was a hero of Rome! Who will help carry him?!
Germ “Mini Me” Tollver as Airplanenut: Cool!
Sweaty: People, this is great! Now, in this scene the detective enters… I had Jom Cruise set to play him, but he bailed… So who’s my Sherlock?….
dddangerousdan: How about, Shylock?
Shylock: I’m no Sherlock.
JLW: No shirt, Shylock!
Sweaty: You’re makin’ my head spin… Okay... (pointing) YOU!
Coinguy1: (gulp) Me?
Sweaty: You're my detective! Can ya act?
Coinguy1: If you're buying a coin from me...
Sweaty: Good! What's your name, kid?
Toners: His name's Mark Feld!
Sweaty: SPARK WELD!!! I love it! (he throws his arms in the air) I can see it now... "Coins and Girlfriends--A Deadly Mix!" Starring Spark Weld as Dectective A.T. McFlame! It'll be the pinnacle of my career! Okay, Sparky! Just read the lines… and… ACTION!!!
The camera wheels around and focuses on Coinguy1
Detective Coinguy1: (shuffling feet) Um... okay, I've gotta question you guys... um... anyone here ever deal with Harry Laibstain?
Dog97: (stroking his AK47) Not yet... but I will.
Sweaty: Good Dog! Good! You're a natural!
Detective Coinguy1: Um... anyone know where to get Christmas cards with numismatic themes...?
Sweaty: CUT! CUT! (he puts his arm around Coinguy1) Spark, babe. You're a MOVIE star! YOU'RE SPARK WELD FOR CRYIN' OUT LOUD!!!! I need ya to deliever these lines like you gotta pair!
Mrs. Coinboard: Mr. Coinberg!!! Try to remember, these are children! Not actors or movie stars or numismatic enhancers!
Sweaty: Coinbroad... acting is truth. Acting is NOT lying. I'm trying to get at some TRUTH HERE!!!!!
The lights dim and a single spotlight focuses on The Ghost of Fudgie Ebsen playing young Pat Braddick
The Ghost of Fudgie Ebsen: All the bickering in the World doesn't change the Truth. Here is Truth:
He pulls back a large tarp from under which springs Truthteller as played by Whack Nickleson in full dress Marine uniform
Whack Nickleson: YOU WANT THE TRUTH? YOU CAN'T HAN-DLE THE TRUTH!!!!!!!
---Silence---
All: BWWWWWWWWWWHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Sweaty Coinberg: CUT! CUT! It's a wrap! Perfect people, PERFECT!
The class and film makers all leave the room. Dorkkarl is standing alone, talking to himself
Dorkkarl: Truthteller’s right. They can't handle the truth. All coins with wild'n'crazy colors are artifiicially toned! …Right Hamstaconda? (He goes to the cage and opens the door) come here, lil’ fella…. Hi there… goochy-goochy... YEEEOOOOOOOOWWWWW!!!!!!!! MU-THER OF PEARL!!!!!!!!!
All: Good morning Mrs. Coinboard!
Mrs. CB: Class, today we have a special treat! These wonderful people from Hollywood are here to film a movie all about the class!
All: YEA!!!!!!!!!!!
Mrs. CB: Now class, I'm going to turn it over to Sweaty Coinberg, director of our favorite movie: "ET: the Extra Testicle."
Sweaty Coinberg: (through megaphone) Yeah, hello there, class! What we're doing here is filming a new episode of my hit series "Trolling for Dollars!" This episode is titled: "Coins and Girlfriends--a Deadly Mix!" And stars Sven Coinnery as the corpse of your very own Cameron Kiefer. Now, we have some big stars here, boys and girls... we've got Mrs. Doubtfire playin' the Coinbroad and Flint Wormwood here as Russ, so let's start filming from the top... and... ACTION!!!!
The camera pans to Mrs. Doubtfire at the head of the class, dressed like Mrs. Coinboard
Mrs. Doubtfire: Oh... oh, hello dears...
Sweaty Coinberg: Say the line!
Mrs. Doubtfire: Oh.. oh, yes. Good morning class, dears!
1907Quarter: Hey, she didn't do it right!
Sweaty Coinberg: Stuff it kid, we're rolling! Well... answer her, peckerwoods!
All: (stiffly) Good morn-ing Mrs. Coin-board.
Sweaty: Okay! Great stuff! Now... Flint give 'em your line as that Russ kid....
Flint Wormwood: Got proof JFK's?... well... do ya, PUNK?!
Sweaty: Cut! Cut! Flint, baby, bubby... just say the line. "Got JFK's?"
Flint: But that's not what he says! I studied this kid. He says (in a nany-nany voice) "Got proof JFK's?" And don’t call me Russ. I wanna be called Rock—Rock Compucheap! Russ is too close to Rusty… that ain't Flint Wormwood style...
Sweaty: Fine! Would you say the line please... "Rock?!"
Flint: (striking a match off the top of Leothelyon's head, puffing a cigar and squinting) Got JFK's?
Mrs. Doubtfire: Oh... oh dear... is-- is the smaller bus operating for you, Rusty-- I mean Rock!
Sweaty: Cut! CUT! "Is the short bus working for you?" Is it so hard?!! Short! Sweet! (claps) Keep goin'-- time is money people!
The door to the classroom bursts open and in struts Mr. T playing a2labmom. He carries the body of Cameron Kiefer in his arms
Mr. T: Say Fools! Look what I found in the yard! Looks like the body of that buddin' young Romeo, Cameron Kiefer! I told the Fool... don't be messin' with no girls!
KoinKollector: Oh my God!!!! Somebody get a CoinDr.!!!!!!!!!
All: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!! (they pelt him savagely with lunchmeat and vegetables)
Sweaty: Excellent! Now lay the body on Coinboard's desk! Keep rolling!
The camera follows Mr. T as he plops the body of young Kiefer on the desk. Famous actor Tussle Crowe playing Fairlaneman approaches
Tussle Crowe: He was a hero of Rome! Who will help carry him?!
Germ “Mini Me” Tollver as Airplanenut: Cool!
Sweaty: People, this is great! Now, in this scene the detective enters… I had Jom Cruise set to play him, but he bailed… So who’s my Sherlock?….
dddangerousdan: How about, Shylock?
Shylock: I’m no Sherlock.
JLW: No shirt, Shylock!
Sweaty: You’re makin’ my head spin… Okay... (pointing) YOU!
Coinguy1: (gulp) Me?
Sweaty: You're my detective! Can ya act?
Coinguy1: If you're buying a coin from me...
Sweaty: Good! What's your name, kid?
Toners: His name's Mark Feld!
Sweaty: SPARK WELD!!! I love it! (he throws his arms in the air) I can see it now... "Coins and Girlfriends--A Deadly Mix!" Starring Spark Weld as Dectective A.T. McFlame! It'll be the pinnacle of my career! Okay, Sparky! Just read the lines… and… ACTION!!!
The camera wheels around and focuses on Coinguy1
Detective Coinguy1: (shuffling feet) Um... okay, I've gotta question you guys... um... anyone here ever deal with Harry Laibstain?
Dog97: (stroking his AK47) Not yet... but I will.
Sweaty: Good Dog! Good! You're a natural!
Detective Coinguy1: Um... anyone know where to get Christmas cards with numismatic themes...?
Sweaty: CUT! CUT! (he puts his arm around Coinguy1) Spark, babe. You're a MOVIE star! YOU'RE SPARK WELD FOR CRYIN' OUT LOUD!!!! I need ya to deliever these lines like you gotta pair!
Mrs. Coinboard: Mr. Coinberg!!! Try to remember, these are children! Not actors or movie stars or numismatic enhancers!
Sweaty: Coinbroad... acting is truth. Acting is NOT lying. I'm trying to get at some TRUTH HERE!!!!!
The lights dim and a single spotlight focuses on The Ghost of Fudgie Ebsen playing young Pat Braddick
The Ghost of Fudgie Ebsen: All the bickering in the World doesn't change the Truth. Here is Truth:
He pulls back a large tarp from under which springs Truthteller as played by Whack Nickleson in full dress Marine uniform
Whack Nickleson: YOU WANT THE TRUTH? YOU CAN'T HAN-DLE THE TRUTH!!!!!!!
---Silence---
All: BWWWWWWWWWWHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Sweaty Coinberg: CUT! CUT! It's a wrap! Perfect people, PERFECT!
The class and film makers all leave the room. Dorkkarl is standing alone, talking to himself
Dorkkarl: Truthteller’s right. They can't handle the truth. All coins with wild'n'crazy colors are artifiicially toned! …Right Hamstaconda? (He goes to the cage and opens the door) come here, lil’ fella…. Hi there… goochy-goochy... YEEEOOOOOOOOWWWWW!!!!!!!! MU-THER OF PEARL!!!!!!!!!
Brevity is the soul of wit. --William Shakespeare
0
Comments
Cameron Kiefer
Thanks again!
Another stellar episode! Thanks for the part.
Joe
Obscurum per obscurius
Check out my PQ selection of Morgan & Peace Dollars, and more at:
WWW.PQDOLLARS.COM or WWW.GILBERTCOINS.COM
I would have come out to play, but hell, the company here is just too good. Never seen a finer looking bunch of fellers. (leans in and whispers) One thing though... that Devil Bear cheats... gotta watch him like a hawk.
Russ, NCNE
designset
Treasury Seals Type Set
just 1 thing though, i completely disagree about what you wrote regarding ......
K S
Total Copper Nutcase - African, British Ships, Channel Islands!!!
'Do not meddle in the affairs of dragons, for you are crunchy and taste good with ketchup'
Great stuff....
see? My Auctions "Got any 1800's gold?"
And I got lots and lots of PR JFKs and they
are all miiinnnneeeeee. Tee Hee Hee!!!!!!!
Camelot
The movie ain't over yet. Do you really think there could be a movie without Bear? You're the Star of Stars, sir. The King of Kings. It's just darn hard to cast you, because they don't make 'em big enough anymore.
its the movies"(Sunset Blvd-Gloria Swanson)
I give fair warning the little bear aint thru yet
I will be back on top, you will see, you will all see.
In the mean time , I think I will color another coin with
my crayons. Bwaaaahaaaaahaaaaaa
Camelot
Camelot
<< <i>call me what you want, but I fail to see the humor. >>
Russ, NCNE
chocolate coated. The vendor would wear a white uniform and ride
a bike with a a large ice cream box attached. We could hear him ring his
bell a half mile away. We would run and get our money and wait at one
of the regular stops in an orderly line. Ahh summertime spring and fall
in New York City. If you saved the ice cream sticks you could turn them in for
gifts or free icecream. Life can be simple and good when you are young
and the world seems new and fresh.
Camelot
<< <i>call me what you want, but I fail to see the humor. There's a critic in every bunch. >>
i disagree! some bunches do NOT have a critic!
K S
Here's a warning parable for coin collectors...
Henceforth be it known in these parts that CLANKEYE shall forever be know as SCRIBE CLANKEYE, or SIR CLANKEYE for his never ending ability to portray, through a humourous and wonderfully picturesque window, the goings and comings of those on the COINBOARD! And to lend a sense of relief to those here who would try to take things WAY too seriously!
HERE HERE!
Thanks Clankeye - Good work
see? My Auctions "Got any 1800's gold?"
and you would be in the story for sure. But you know old Clank, he is an upright,
uptight guy. I guess all talented people are always a little constipated. Bear
Camelot
We'll use our hands and hearts and if we must we'll use our heads.