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"Good Morning Class" Pirates of the Coinibbean --The Curse of... Part 2
Clankeye
Posts: 3,928 ✭
Somewhere in the Coinibbean, The P.O.S. has taken to the high seas. It is a humble vessel, with a slight list to the port and her sails in rags--nonetheless, Captain Hallatio Coinblower must work with what he has. The Captain stands on the quarterdeck with the ship's surgeon and his first mate Mister Kranky
Captain Coinblower: Doctor! How are Mister Kranky's frankies?
Doctor Poole: Happy to report sir, with a little putty and some thumbing--good as new!
Mister Kranky: Thanks be to ya, Doc!
Captain Coinblower: Excellent work, Poole!
Doctor Poole: Thank you, sir!
Coinblower scans the horizon with a spyglass
Mis-ter Kranky! Who is our cook this trip?
Mister Kranky: They calls him Tonecoin2003, Cap'n!
Captain Coinblower: Aswimmer?
Mister Kranky: Doubt he can swim, Cap'n! Fatter'n a cannon ball!
Captain Coinblower: Well! (perky) How fair the crew!
Mister Kranky: Somes are questioning yer guarantee ta ‘ave ‘em back in fifteen days, sir!
Captain Coinblower: (snapping the spyglass shut) DOGS!! (pauses) It’s Silver isn’t it? BLAST HIS EYES! I'll live to regret bringing that man on board!
On deck, Long Jom Silver packs his pipe, speaking in a low voice timbered by years at sea
Long Jom Silver: (nodding at Coinblower) Look at 'em up there... sawed-off little rooster!
All: (murmuring) Arrrrr...
Tiny Peetie: There's some thinks you should be Cap'n, Long Jom!
Bingo Baily: Keep yer voice down! Kiefer the cabin boy's sniffing 'round!
Mr. Arco: Arrrr!
TwoDogs: (scowling) I'd like to send Coinblower and ‘is cabin boy to Bill Jones' Locker!
Mr. Arco: ARRRRR!!!!
Mr. Barberlover: Tell us 'bout The Jade Coin, Long Jom--some say it's a ghost ship!
Long Jom Silver: GHOST SHIP? (he draws off his pipe) When last I see’d The Jade, I was on The HMS Tradedollarnut. Chasing her for weeks we was—back and forth between here and the N G Sea.… When we finally caught her, we opened fire with twenty crack four pounders from a sword’s length away! TERRIBLE DIN, BOYS!! Smoke and fire and the smell of sulfer and death!!! But when the smoke clears... (he fixes them with a hard stare) ... there be nothin' there!
JxnBoy: Nuthin'?
Long Jom Silver: Aye! The Jade vanished without a trace. Not a plank... not a boot... not a thread.
Mr. Arco: Arrrrr???
Jxnboy (confused) Where'd it go?
Long Jom Silver: Somes says straight to Hell. But Coinblower and I'se know different.
Mean Mozeppa: Ow'ed you lose that leg, Long Jom?
Long Jom Silver: Remember--I served on The Jade Coin too, boys!
All: Arrrrrrr!
Long Jom Silver: --Was with her when it took The Norweb! A fine treasure was ours... until your Captain Coinblower hoved into view... his first shot hit our mizzenmast--AND THE MAIN TUCK TOOK ME LEG!!
All: HAAAAAR!!!!!
Corkkarl: Yer a devil and liar, Silver!
Long Jom Silver: (grabbing his pistol) Yer always poppin' off, Corkkarl! Hold yer tongue or lose it!!!
Corkkarl: Why would Coinblower go after The Jade Coin again?
Long Jom Silver: The mizzen got me leg... and Coinblower got THE NORWEB TREASURE! (nose to nose with Corkkarl) BUT not all of it, mate! And it cost 'em his commission in the Royal Navy....
…He's got unfinished business with The Jade. And I’ve unfinished business with 'im.
Down in the galley, Mad Martin of Mumsford is waking up with a terrible hangover
Mad Martin: (pained) Oooooh... where am I? ...ow'd I get here?
Cook Tonecoin2003: Yer on THE P.O.S. Now shut yer gob and start peelin' those potatoes!
Mad Martin sways back and forth staring groggily into the potato barrel. With a mighty roar he pukeths into the barrel
BLARRRRAARRLLLLLAARWWWARRRLLLL!!!!!!! ...eck!
--Silence--
Cook Tonecoin2003: (stunned) YOU STINKIN' WOG!!!!!!
Mad Martin: (smiling) Oops! I did it again!
To Be Continued....
Captain Coinblower: Doctor! How are Mister Kranky's frankies?
Doctor Poole: Happy to report sir, with a little putty and some thumbing--good as new!
Mister Kranky: Thanks be to ya, Doc!
Captain Coinblower: Excellent work, Poole!
Doctor Poole: Thank you, sir!
Coinblower scans the horizon with a spyglass
Mis-ter Kranky! Who is our cook this trip?
Mister Kranky: They calls him Tonecoin2003, Cap'n!
Captain Coinblower: Aswimmer?
Mister Kranky: Doubt he can swim, Cap'n! Fatter'n a cannon ball!
Captain Coinblower: Well! (perky) How fair the crew!
Mister Kranky: Somes are questioning yer guarantee ta ‘ave ‘em back in fifteen days, sir!
Captain Coinblower: (snapping the spyglass shut) DOGS!! (pauses) It’s Silver isn’t it? BLAST HIS EYES! I'll live to regret bringing that man on board!
On deck, Long Jom Silver packs his pipe, speaking in a low voice timbered by years at sea
Long Jom Silver: (nodding at Coinblower) Look at 'em up there... sawed-off little rooster!
All: (murmuring) Arrrrr...
Tiny Peetie: There's some thinks you should be Cap'n, Long Jom!
Bingo Baily: Keep yer voice down! Kiefer the cabin boy's sniffing 'round!
Mr. Arco: Arrrr!
TwoDogs: (scowling) I'd like to send Coinblower and ‘is cabin boy to Bill Jones' Locker!
Mr. Arco: ARRRRR!!!!
Mr. Barberlover: Tell us 'bout The Jade Coin, Long Jom--some say it's a ghost ship!
Long Jom Silver: GHOST SHIP? (he draws off his pipe) When last I see’d The Jade, I was on The HMS Tradedollarnut. Chasing her for weeks we was—back and forth between here and the N G Sea.… When we finally caught her, we opened fire with twenty crack four pounders from a sword’s length away! TERRIBLE DIN, BOYS!! Smoke and fire and the smell of sulfer and death!!! But when the smoke clears... (he fixes them with a hard stare) ... there be nothin' there!
JxnBoy: Nuthin'?
Long Jom Silver: Aye! The Jade vanished without a trace. Not a plank... not a boot... not a thread.
Mr. Arco: Arrrrr???
Jxnboy (confused) Where'd it go?
Long Jom Silver: Somes says straight to Hell. But Coinblower and I'se know different.
Mean Mozeppa: Ow'ed you lose that leg, Long Jom?
Long Jom Silver: Remember--I served on The Jade Coin too, boys!
All: Arrrrrrr!
Long Jom Silver: --Was with her when it took The Norweb! A fine treasure was ours... until your Captain Coinblower hoved into view... his first shot hit our mizzenmast--AND THE MAIN TUCK TOOK ME LEG!!
All: HAAAAAR!!!!!
Corkkarl: Yer a devil and liar, Silver!
Long Jom Silver: (grabbing his pistol) Yer always poppin' off, Corkkarl! Hold yer tongue or lose it!!!
Corkkarl: Why would Coinblower go after The Jade Coin again?
Long Jom Silver: The mizzen got me leg... and Coinblower got THE NORWEB TREASURE! (nose to nose with Corkkarl) BUT not all of it, mate! And it cost 'em his commission in the Royal Navy....
…He's got unfinished business with The Jade. And I’ve unfinished business with 'im.
Down in the galley, Mad Martin of Mumsford is waking up with a terrible hangover
Mad Martin: (pained) Oooooh... where am I? ...ow'd I get here?
Cook Tonecoin2003: Yer on THE P.O.S. Now shut yer gob and start peelin' those potatoes!
Mad Martin sways back and forth staring groggily into the potato barrel. With a mighty roar he pukeths into the barrel
BLARRRRAARRLLLLLAARWWWARRRLLLL!!!!!!! ...eck!
--Silence--
Cook Tonecoin2003: (stunned) YOU STINKIN' WOG!!!!!!
Mad Martin: (smiling) Oops! I did it again!
To Be Continued....
Brevity is the soul of wit. --William Shakespeare
0
Comments
09/07/2006
Pirates of the Coinibbean -- The Curse of The Jade Coin Part 1
09/07/2006
Thanks for the entertainment. I'm with the rest; PCGS should pay you for this stuff!
And a nice illustration to boot. You guys are too much!
We'll use our hands and hearts and if we must we'll use our heads.
Clank, thanks for another wonderful tale.
I bet someone will post, "What's a cabin-boy??"
"Ask, and it shall be given you; seek, and ye shall find; knock, and it shall be opened unto you." -Luke 11:9
"Hear, O Israel: The LORD our God is one LORD: And thou shalt love the LORD thy God with all thine heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy might." -Deut. 6:4-5
"For the LORD is our judge, the LORD is our lawgiver, the LORD is our king; He will save us." -Isaiah 33:22
"Aswimmer?"
"Doubt he can swim, Cap'n!"
New collectors, please educate yourself before spending money on coins; there are people who believe that using numismatic knowledge to rip the naïve is what this hobby is all about.
... and not "OT"
Liberty: Parent of Science & Industry
is that you end up being governed by inferiors. – Plato
Three Arrrrrrhhhhs from me!
Total Copper Nutcase - African, British Ships, Channel Islands!!!
'Do not meddle in the affairs of dragons, for you are crunchy and taste good with ketchup'
MORE MORE MORE!!!
K S
Really enjoyable reading.
Jade Rare Coin eBay Listings
Once again mate - Clankeye rules
Marc
jom
In the meantime, rest yer good leg, and keeps an eye open for thems that might betray ya.
Clankeye
<< <i>OMG, I'm a puking Parrot! >>
09/07/2006
jom (making up "clever" pirate adjectives as I go...lol)
Here's a warning parable for coin collectors...
<< <i>you slimy rot ridden plank hound >>
Now don't be tryin' to worm yer way into me good graces, Long Jom!
Clankeye
I finally made it into one of the stories!
Big Mike <><
Let your roots grow down into him and draw up nourishment from him, so you will grow in faith, strong and vigorous in the truth you were taught. Let your lives overflow with thanksgiving for all that he has done. --Colossians 2:7
"Ask, and it shall be given you; seek, and ye shall find; knock, and it shall be opened unto you." -Luke 11:9
"Hear, O Israel: The LORD our God is one LORD: And thou shalt love the LORD thy God with all thine heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy might." -Deut. 6:4-5
"For the LORD is our judge, the LORD is our lawgiver, the LORD is our king; He will save us." -Isaiah 33:22
Tiny Peetie.
Geez I gotta change my forum name.
<< <i>With a mighty roar he vomits into the barrel >>
He should've pukethed....
Clankeye
Arrrrrrrrrrr!
Don't forget Clank, that the Jade has sailed under at least six other flags in the Bay of Eee . . . it shivers me timbers!!!!!!!!!! ARRRRRRRRRRRRRRR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Come on over ... to The Dark Side!
FOR SALE Items
you Clank , when it comes to story tellin... Arrrrrrrrrrr.
Camelot
Mojo
-Jim Morrison-
Mr. Mojorizn
my blog:www.numistories.com
Les
Cosmic:
Nice photo.
Camelot
All: ARRRR!!!!!!!!
Great story,Clankeye,but i am woundering about two things.
Is Skull Island in these parts,and,whats that guy in the poster look at?
Thanks.I't Monday.
I give it
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See ya on the other side, Dudes.