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Re: The forum needs a little humor.
An old, blind Marine wanders into an all-girl biker bar by mistake. He finds his way to a bar stool and orders a shot of Jack Daniels. After sitting there for a while, he yells to the bartender, 'Hey, you wanna hear a blonde joke?' The bar immediately falls absolutely silent. In a very deep, husky voice, the woman next to… -
Re: The forum needs a little humor.
A first-grade teacher, Ms Brooks, was having trouble with one of her students. The teacher asked, 'Harry, what's your problem?' Harry answered, 'I'm too smart for the 1st grade. My sister is in the 3rd grade and I'm smarter than she is! I think I should be in the 3rd grade too!' Ms.. Brooks had enough. She took Harry to… -
Re: The forum needs a little humor.
Nine Important Facts to Remember as We Grow Older: 9 Death is the number 1 killer in the world. 8 Life is sexually transmitted. 7 Good health is merely the slowest possible rate at which one can die. 6 Men have two motivations: hunger and hanky-panky, and they can't tell them apart. If you see a gleam in his eyes, make him… -
Re: The forum needs a little humor.
I wonder about this too. Yesterday I was at a chain hardware store getting taken care of by the manager. One of the employees asked the mgr something and he patiently said "Not right now. That needs to be done at 6:30." The employee just stood there and looked lost. The manager said "Was there something else you needed ?"… -
Re: The forum needs a little humor.
WOMAN: A Chemical Analysis ELEMENT: Woman SYMBOL: Wo DISCOVERER: Adam ATOMIC MASS: Accepted as 118lbs known to vary from 95 to 550lbs OCCURRENCE: Copious quantities throughout the world. PHYSICAL PROPERTIES: 1. Surface usually covered with a painted film. 2. Boils at nothing, freezes without reason. 3. Melts if given… -
Re: The forum needs a little humor.
A cat dies and goes to Heaven. God meets him at the gate and says, "You have been a good cat all of these years. Anything you desire is yours, all you have to do is ask." The cats says, "Well, I lived all my life with a poor family on a farm and had to sleep on hardwood floors." God says, "Say no more." And instantly, a… -
Re: The forum needs a little humor.
Haven't posted in this thread for ages. Seems like at two two ages. 68 & 69? Anyway here goes... A paraprosdokian, as you know, is a sentence or statement with an unexpected ending. It means “against expectations” in Greek. 1)Will the idea of glass coffins be a success? Remains to be seen. 2)What’s the difference between a… -
Re: The forum needs a little humor.
A Minneapolis couple decided to go to Florida to thaw out during a particularly icy winter. They planned to stay at the same hotel where they spent their honeymoon 20 years earlier. Because of hectic schedules, it was difficult to coordinate their travel plans. So, the husband left Minneapolis and flew to Florida on… -
Re: The forum needs a little humor.
This is a very easy and safe No Risk Home-Exercise during this Virus epidemic Begin standing on a comfortable surface with plenty of stretch room to each side of you. It involves very light exercising 3 times a day for less then a minute.each time Weeke one: Day one Right after breakfast, and with a 3-LB potato sack in…
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