"Good Morning Class" -- What's Hot in Coinalot?

Clankeye · March 4, 2003 3:40AM

In the kindom of Coinalot, the Knights are unhappy...

Sir Legend: This armor is too tight! It constricts! It does not fit! How I am to kill peasants in this!
Sir Wondercoin: 'Tis just so! Look my arms! I can hardly raiseth them! How am I to drop an axe upon their skulls! Too tight! I SAY IT IS TOO TIGHT!
Sir TDN: Me thinks if the royal forge does not stop making armor too tight, I shall go to The Kingdom of Sleep, where they make armor of a higher grade. Loosely, and that which befits a Knight!
Sir Legend: Here, Here!
Sir Wondercoin: Here, Here!
Sir TDN: (staring at Sir EVP) Well....????
Sir EVP: Oh... oh yes, HERE! HERE!!!

Meahwhile in the castle courtyard...

Sir Pushkin: Look at that ugly banner Lord Anaconda has draped upon the turret- "Pretty Castle-Courtesy of Lord Anaconda" It strikes me as advertising most foul!
Sir Agentjim007: Just chilleth. Save thy anger for something of import. I have learned this wisdom over many years....

Squire Mbbiker comes running up

Squire Mbbiker: Good Sirs! Sir Legend is saying the new armor is too tight! And it is not fit for killing peasants in!
Sir Agentjim007: (enraged) BY THE GODS!!! (grabbing biker by the throat and shaking) ME THINKEST I SHALL PUKETH! WHAT FOUL REPORT IS THIS!!!!
Squire Mbbiker: Gaaaaakkkkkk....gaak!
Sir Pushkin: Good Jim!!! Sir Jim!!! CHILLETH!
Sir Agentjim007: (roaring) KILLETH!!! KILLETH!!!
Squire Mbbiker: (choking out words) He... said... chill--eth....

PUT HIM DOWN!!!!!

The tussle is stopped. All look up to see his Majesty King ArtR

King ArtR: Do not kill my messenger, Sir AgentJim. And please, wipe the spittle from thy cheek.
Sir Agentjim007: (bowing) Your Majesty! It is just... he brings most sorry news. The other Knights complaining the armor is too tight! Last year it was too loose! Next year it will probably be the wrong color! Let me smite them your Majesty, for they are a threat to the Kingdom!
King ArtR: (laughing) And why would that be so, Sir Jim?
Sir Agentjim007: They foster discontent, your Majesty.
Sir Baseball: They are scoundrels, your Highness!
Sir NumisEd: Cold blooded!
Sir Baseball: The armor already gives them unfair advantage over the peasants. And now it is too tight? 'Tis NOT!
Sir Agentjim007: Your Majesty, by proclaiming the armor too tight, they undermine the morale of the entire castle!
King ArtR: (laughing heartily) I think not. Many here can see that the armor is not too tight, it is merely the Knights have grown too fat.
The Archbishop of Coinguy1 (troubled) Your Majesty... surely you are joking?
King ArtR: Am I? .... But of course I am. Let us ask the castle madman... Madmarty what sayest thou?

.Madmarty scurries forth. He is a choatic collection of rags, bags and tangled hair. He begins to sing

Once there was a happy Knight
His armor was just right
It never seemed too loose to him
Nor did it seem too tight
A potato he kept in his crotch
To keep it nice and warm--

King ArtR: SILENCE!!!!
Jester Shiroh: Has potential, your Majesty.

King ArtR turns and addresses the crowd

King ArtR: Citizens of Coinalot! ...The armor is what it is. Work with it.

He exits

Karl of Dork: (turning to the crowd) Ya know... the problem with the armor is it only protects fifty percent of you! Sure, if you take a lance to the---

The crowd sets upon him and rips him limb from limb

Squire Airplanenut: Cool

mdwoods · March 4, 2003 3:45AM

El Superbo Deluxo.

MadMarty · March 4, 2003 3:45AM

ROTFLMAO!!!! Ahhhhhhh I needed that!!!

coinguy1 · March 4, 2003 3:45AM

Excellent, too short, more, more....please...

bulloncoins · March 4, 2003 3:46AM

LOL!!!!!!

MadMonk · March 4, 2003 3:46AM

Now that's what we needed, a good chuckle. Thanks Maestro Clankeye!

dorkkarl · March 4, 2003 3:49AM

youch! that hurt!

i hate getting ripped limb from limb!

K S

Russ · March 4, 2003 3:49AM

<< King ArtR: (laughing heartily) I think not. Many here can see that the armor is not too tight, it is merely the Knights have grown too fat. >>

Bwuahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Russ, NCNE

prooflike · March 4, 2003 3:54AM

That was most excellent! But I agree with coinguy, too short. Maybe quality over quantity?

dakra · March 4, 2003 3:54AM

What do I have to do around here to get into this class?
The Author is an utter Ars

What was I absent that day?
When Sir Legend had her say?

No I wasn't
No I wasn't
Waa Waa Waa
A sheep in the distance says
Baaa Baaa Baa

....Okay, never mind

Bravo Sir Clankeye! Bravo!

-Dave

MadMarty · March 4, 2003 3:54AM

Owwwww, Frank the pug is hurt, he has been trying out for that postition all year...

Pushkin · March 4, 2003 3:59AM

Bravo, Prince Royal of the Word, bravo!

Zerbe · March 4, 2003 4:05AM

I love {THE KINGDOM OF SLEEP} Excellent !

barberlover · March 4, 2003 4:08AM

Clankeye, i'm not sure if i should feel insulted or glad that you did not include me in your story of coinalot. thanks for the laugh though. I can use all i can gt these days. barberth lover

Bear · March 4, 2003 4:21AM

Clank, You have taken the essence of 300 replies and wove a story of gossemer delight.

You have spun purest gold from the most utter dross, chaff and discards. You are indeed, the master

writer of all you survey. Methinks a new story three times a day, 7 days a week ,wouldest seem

the number most correct to the task at hand. That, most noble Bard, is to raise the level of

mirth and merryment in this dower and most serious of places. For without thy witty tales, gray shadows

coat the walls and even the denizens of this place ,as with a heavy blanket of doom .

Without the Bards noble wit , there is indeed the smell most rank , of mold and decay aroundeth the place

nwcs · March 4, 2003 4:22AM

Now we just need the coin cootie patrol!

MadMarty · March 4, 2003 4:54AM

Hey Bear,
At least you didn't get shot this week!

Mrpawn · March 4, 2003 4:56AM

Most excellent review of the past week

I truely look forward to these

ah · March 4, 2003 5:14AM

That blurb must have taken some time to assemble.
applause !

Bear · March 4, 2003 5:22AM

Marshall bear didnt get shot. O happy days are here again, wooppeee!!!!!

Clankeye · March 4, 2003 5:24AM

<< That blurb must have taken some time to assemble. >>

Well, fortunately it came with instructions.

Clankeye

Bear · March 4, 2003 5:25AM

When King ArtR was told " Sire , the peasents are revolting", he replied............................................

...................................................................................................................they coytenly are!!!!

Yuck, yuck, yuck!!!

Tonekiller · March 4, 2003 5:28AM

LOL!

ClarkOfKent · March 4, 2003 5:42AM

Another classic, Clank. Well worth the wait.

So.... when can we expect today's regularly scheduled episode?

JeffinMich · March 4, 2003 5:46AM

TTT - LOL....great stuff!

ccrdragon · March 4, 2003 5:46AM

If you keep writing these, my boss is going to fire me for disrupting the office with laughter!!!

BRAVO!!!!

cosmicdebris · March 4, 2003 7:09AM

Carl another Masterpiece!!!!!!!!!!!!

wondercoin · March 4, 2003 7:17AM

"King ArtR: (laughing heartily) I think not. Many here can see that the armor is not too tight, it is merely the Knights have grown too fat."

Darn it - I din't think you noticed - I have cut back on the midnight snacks while sitting at this computer screen

Well done!

Wondercoin

NumisEd · March 4, 2003 7:20AM

Well done. I would like to see you work in Sir Russalot and Ye Lady LucyBop.

airplanenut · March 4, 2003 7:23AM

<< youch! that hurt!

i hate getting ripped limb from limb!

K S >>

But 'twas cool

EXCELLENT as usual!

I give it a cool

MadMonk · March 4, 2003 7:26AM

They have the pieces of DorkKarl for sale on ebay already!!!

bulloncoins · March 4, 2003 7:29AM

<< Well done. I would like to see you work in Sir Russalot and Ye Lady LucyBop. >>

Let us all also recall Brave Sir Toners who goeth forward to banish our darkest enemies.....

Clankeye · March 4, 2003 7:35AM

Yes, agreed. A nod to brave, Sir Toners.

And to our Mad Monk who with his "pieces of Dorkkarl are already on eBay" line made me laugh!

Clankeye

agfox · March 4, 2003 7:36AM

You just can't get enough of that. Just can't.

Baley · March 4, 2003 7:40AM

indeed!

wingedliberty · March 4, 2003 8:04AM

Simply awesome. I needed a good laugh.

Brian.

RegistryCoin · March 4, 2003 8:16AM

Excellent. Thank you.

MadMarty · March 4, 2003 8:18AM

Yes, a day without pukith is like a day without sunshine!

marcmoish · March 4, 2003 8:26AM

yay, just won Dorkkal's liver on Ebay, I sniped it from Laura

LucyBop · March 4, 2003 8:28AM

<< yay, just won Dorkkal's liver on Ebay, >>

And I'm gonna snipe his (CENSORED)!

Clankeye · March 4, 2003 8:29AM

I was hoping to get his liver, Marc. After my wild youth, I figure just about anyone's is better than mine.

Clankeye

coinguy1 · March 4, 2003 8:33AM

I just won dorkkarl's "I disagree" on Ebay. The bidding and disagreements were fierce.

RegistryCoin · March 4, 2003 8:41AM

I hear smart money has Dorkkarl's pq attitude going for 10x grey.

cladking · March 4, 2003 9:21AM

Another classic. Thanks Clankeye.

ClarkOfKent · March 4, 2003 9:38AM

<< And I'm gonna snipe his (CENSORED)! >>

Hmmm... interesting. Most women are looking to snip mine!

LucyBop · March 4, 2003 9:40AM

Put yours up for auction Daddy-o, but be sure to include a Buy It Now, and you better have a good return policy in case it doesn't meet the grade!

KlectorKid · March 4, 2003 9:40AM

I got ripped! I bought his stomach for almost 5 dollars and when I arrived all the acid was gone. Damn mailman trying to steal my bodily liquids! I wonder if I could find something to fill it up with and return it. Lucy you got any acid I could barrow? If not there is always lemon juice.

LucyBop · March 4, 2003 9:43AM

I sure do Kiddy-o, hows about 10:1 Hydroflouric, or 50:1 Hf? Nitric acid? Sulfuric Acid? Phosphoric? I've handled them all....

KlectorKid · March 4, 2003 9:45AM

Can I have a mix? Or would that explode and turn my house into a ball of fire?

Clankeye · March 4, 2003 9:49AM

I confess that when I titled this thread "What's Hot in Coinalot" I was definitely thinking of Lady Lucy of Bop. How could it be otherwise?

Clankeye

Coinosaurus · March 4, 2003 10:04AM

Would someone please post the "annotated Clankeye" so I can understand all this

The part I did understand was damn funny......I can only imagine what I missed

"Good Morning Class" -- What's Hot in Coinalot?

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&quot;Good Morning Class&quot; -- What's Hot in Coinalot?

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"Good Morning Class" -- What's Hot in Coinalot?