A young executive was leaving the office late one evening when he found the CEO standing in front of a shredder with a piece of paper in his hand.
"Listen," said the CEO, "this is a very sensitive and important document here, and my secretary has gone for the night. Can you make this thing work for me?"
"Certainly," said the young executive. He turned the machine on, inserted the paper, and pressed the start button.
"Excellent, excellent!" said the CEO, as his paper disappeared inside the machine. "I just need one copy..."
A bear walks into a tavern where a horse tends the bar, steps up and says, “ I would like.................................a...beer.”
The horse replied, “why the big paws?”
A farmer was showing his city cousin around his farm when they see a three-legged pig hobbling around the barnyard.
"What's that?", asked the cousin.
"Why," replied the farmer, "that's the most valuable pig in the world. It saved my life twice. Once the house caught fire
while I was sleeping, and that pig crashed through the kitchen door and banged on my bedroom door until I woke up. Another time my tractor overturned while I was plowing the field, and that pig ran out and dragged me from beneath it."
"Marvelous," replied the cousin, "but why does the pig have only three legs?"
"A pig like that ...," replied the farmer, "you don't eat all at once."
Lance.
Comments
A young executive was leaving the office late one evening when he found the CEO standing in front of a shredder with a piece of paper in his hand.
"Listen," said the CEO, "this is a very sensitive and important document here, and my secretary has gone for the night. Can you make this thing work for me?"
"Certainly," said the young executive. He turned the machine on, inserted the paper, and pressed the start button.
"Excellent, excellent!" said the CEO, as his paper disappeared inside the machine. "I just need one copy..."
A bear walks into a tavern where a horse tends the bar, steps up and says, “ I would like.................................a...beer.”
The horse replied, “why the big paws?”
https://www.autismforums.com/media/albums/acrylic-colors-by-rocco.291/
A farmer was showing his city cousin around his farm when they see a three-legged pig hobbling around the barnyard.
"What's that?", asked the cousin.
"Why," replied the farmer, "that's the most valuable pig in the world. It saved my life twice. Once the house caught fire
while I was sleeping, and that pig crashed through the kitchen door and banged on my bedroom door until I woke up. Another time my tractor overturned while I was plowing the field, and that pig ran out and dragged me from beneath it."
"Marvelous," replied the cousin, "but why does the pig have only three legs?"
"A pig like that ...," replied the farmer, "you don't eat all at once."
Lance.
In Spain, there is a tradition after a bullfight to serve the mayor the bull’s testicles.
One day after a bullfight, the mayor asks the waiter: “Funny, why are they so small today?”
The waiter: “Today, sir, the bull won.”
Cheers, RickO
Did ya hear about the Farmer who's Tractor left him

He got a John Deere Letter
Steve
Funny !!!
What happened here?
My YouTube Channel
Time for a coin flip!!!! Heads I win, Reverse you lose!!!
I have on of those! It is not appropriate for public posting so I won’t post a picture. It is Not as tasteful as an SLQ
https://www.autismforums.com/media/albums/acrylic-colors-by-rocco.291/
Three vampires walk into a bar.
“Give me a glass of blood,” the first vampire says.
“Same here” the second vampire says.
The third vampire says: “Just a glass of plasma for me.”
“OK,” the bartender says. “Two Bloods and a Blood Lite.”