Passive Aggressive Behavior at a Coin Show
abcde12345
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Are you being passive-aggressive at your local coin show but have no idea? You may be sabotaging your collecting goals and objectives.
You know what it feels like to come across passive-aggressive behavior in your local coin shop — we all know the dealer who “keeps forgetting” to put aside your favorite coins. But while it’s easy to spot when it’s happening to us, it’s not always easy to know when we’re doing it to others.
Please don't be "that guy". Kindness and simple gratitude at small and large coin shows will win you favor and mark you as a gentleman and scholar.
Pushy collectors (those who cover dealers showcases with their coats or paperwork) don't pick the most popular coins! Those are reserved for those with manners and a sense of well-being for others.
Comments
It must be a very competitive market out there....I haven't have a chance to experience either way
Have never been to a coin show before.
I would not know.
In my experience cash usually trumps bad behavior.
Dealers have a bad reputation but most of them are decent people. I try to be respectful and treat them the way I would like to be treated. I have met some real decent folks along the way who have helped me build my set the way I want it to be and for that I am grateful.
Sometimes, it’s better to be LUCKY than good. 🍀 🍺👍
My Full Walker Registry Set (1916-1947):
https://www.ngccoin.com/registry/competitive-sets/16292/
I bought a coin at a show 8 years ago.
The good dealers far outnumber the bad ones....At shows, I just passed by the table(s) of those with whom I had experienced unacceptable behavior. There were only two that I recall. Most dealers are fair and welcoming. Cheers, RickO
There are a lot of great dealers out there. All it takes is 1 bad apple.....................
2020 Campaign Slogan?
the example the op posts about the dealer "forgetting" to set aside coins could be an example of passive aggressive behavior, but the behavior ascribed to the hypothetical collector is best described as inconsiderate/insensitive behavior, IMO. Passive aggression is a group of personality traits and habits that include procrastination, non responsiveness, failure to complete tasks, tardiness, criticism disguised as compliments, etc etc and usually manifests itself over a period of time during multiple interactions. Not trying to sound preachy but I like to see a degree of precision used when tossing around psych or medical terms.
I think the op's point about being considerate, polite and self aware at shows is well taken, and has been discussed many times here on the forum.
And about those coins you were holding for me, I know I didn't show up twice to buy them, but did you have to sell them to that guy who showed up with cash? I thought we were friends!
And rubles usually do not trump bad behavior...
Experience the World through Numismatics...it's more than you can imagine.
And incivility may add to the amount of cash required to trump bad behavior. Or to put it another way, being polite and respectful may save you money through more favorable pricing.
See http://www.doubledimes.com for a free online reference for US twenty-cent pieces
I’m not totally 100% sure on this one, but I would go out on a limb and say “it’s not your average collector that exhibits this behavior.”
At the CSNS I observed many ,let’s call them vest pocket dealers and dealers that have the pull behind totes and all their supplies. These guys plop numerous stacks of coins on the table and the dealer is enthralled in the deal and is for sure guaranteed not to even talk to you as you walk by. No chance in the world to even see the dealers inventory. I’ve witnessed this for years. Usually at larger shows. Yes there is the once in a while mom and pop who bring in their collection for appraisal. So maybe give the collector a break.
Kaz's comment:
"And about those coins you were holding for me, I know I didn't show up twice to buy them, but did you have to sell them to that guy who showed up with cash? I thought we were friends!"
... perhaps says more about this 'issue' than any other comment. Very insightful. This is a two-way street, and although I have never experienced this presumed behavior at coin shows, if it is indeed an issue I cannot place the 'blame' solely at the feet of the dealers. I have personally witnessed more bad behavior from collectors than from dealers.
@astrorat said "And incivility may add to the amount of cash required to trump bad behavior. Or to put it another way, being polite and respectful may save you money through more favorable pricing."
aka "The A**hole Tax"
Getting to know dealers will greatly increase your enjoyment of this great hobby. I enjoy the hunt for coins as much as the actual acquisition. When dealers become friends it becomes that much better. Nothing better than to walk up to a dealer’s table and hear “I have something I think you’ll be interested in”.
Many of my favorite dealers truly enjoy helping in the hunt. It’s more than a business for them
Thanks for sharing.
Check out my current listings: https://ebay.com/sch/khunt/m.html?_ipg=200&_sop=12&_rdc=1
I quibble with a lot of these popular semantics like "passive aggressive"; how about rude, disrespectful, unkind? I don't know how the OP's comment of not doing this or that fits into bad behavior unless there was a clear agreement.
Please explain how Hillie could dramatically outspend Trump and still lose the election.
How will the outcome be different in 2020? Or maybe you will opt for the excuse "usually".
Back to coins. I generally am considered to be a reasonable customer as I pay reasonable prices - I don't overpay and don't shaft the dealers. I want to stay on the good side of dealers so they offer me nice material.
“In matters of style, swim with the current; in matters of principle, stand like a rock." - Thomas Jefferson
My digital cameo album 1950-64 Cameos - take a look!
> Please explain how Hillie could dramatically outspend Trump and still lose the election.
Donald Blankenship effectively murdered 29 WV coal miners and scored 20% in last month's Republican Senate primary.
No one ever went broke underestimating the intelligence of the American public...… but
If you can't do the tax cut math and don't know how screwed you already are, well, HA HA
I'm better off.
Not blind to the kleptocracy. and smart enough to profit off its machinations.
If any coin dealer emulated @OrangeSunshine, you would puke him out of here PDQ.
If a customer did likewise, also likewise.
I've dealt with guys who've been shut down by the FTC and know how to protect myself from RICO clawbacks.
But not the emoluments clause scamsters and guys who can shoot people in broad daylight and those who think that's a primo negotiating tactic.
Not without a photo id for the 1099 for their cash and a light to check the bills. No checks, LOL
Tinfoil wearing anti- vaxxer deep state conspiracy-nut nincompoops: Not everything is a set-up nor are dealers conspiring to keep you from your coin wants. Dang nab it to betsy.
Oh, and if the world was flat cats would have pushed everything off the edge by now.
I simply pull out my greysheet before I even decide to look in a dealers case. I wait for the reaction before deciding to actually look or just walk on to the next dealer. It's a buyers market out there. Don't overpay folks
The whole worlds off its rocker, buy Gold™.
BOOMIN!™
Wooooha! Did someone just say it's officially "TACO™" Tuesday????
I seek refuge from the world's crap here - please don't drag it in. Take partisan politics somewhere else.
Check out my current listings: https://ebay.com/sch/khunt/m.html?_ipg=200&_sop=12&_rdc=1
Agreed. The only Partisan I want to discuss is the cheese. Love it on my pinapple and pepperoni pizza.
Pull out your greysheet looking at my nice original Barber half's? You will have a conversation until you ask the price on one! Then you will walk on buy!