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What we need is a COIN CZAR or even a cute czarena
Bear
Posts: 18,953 ✭✭✭
What this position will do is:
1. Determine the standards for coin grades
2. Set the retail price for every grade of coin
3. Make all attendees and participants at shows, shower first
and perhaps a little roll on under arms.
4. Take all coin doctors, scammers, picture rustlers, phony Ebay bidders
Trolls, rude people, wannabees, hasbeens, couldabeens, wouldabeens
and shouldabeens and use them for kindling at regional bonfires of the vanities.
4.Deflate all egos by at least 50%
5.Prosecute, persecute then execute, all purvayors of dreck, scam artists, liars, cheats
and overgraders
6.Improve the food at all regional and national shows.
7. Provide for the adequate flow of niceness at show as well as clean underwear
8. Take all of the over scrubbed, washed out, dipped out ugly crud that has been overhanging
the market for years, issue Federal Bonds to buy them , melt them into purified bars for the
strategic metal reserve.
9. Price controls shall be placed on nice coins so that average collectors can afford to buy them.
10. Coin minnows, guppies, goldfish , sardines and anchovies shall be force fed untill they are whales.
11. Hunting permits will be issued, for year round shooting of bears on sight.
12. Jelly donuts will be banned for health reasons and the fact that they make the coins very sticky.
13. Ignorent and irritating collectors and dealers, will be sent to mandatory education and niceness camps.
14. Regulate the hight , weight, age and shoe size of all coin dealers.
1. Determine the standards for coin grades
2. Set the retail price for every grade of coin
3. Make all attendees and participants at shows, shower first
and perhaps a little roll on under arms.
4. Take all coin doctors, scammers, picture rustlers, phony Ebay bidders
Trolls, rude people, wannabees, hasbeens, couldabeens, wouldabeens
and shouldabeens and use them for kindling at regional bonfires of the vanities.
4.Deflate all egos by at least 50%
5.Prosecute, persecute then execute, all purvayors of dreck, scam artists, liars, cheats
and overgraders
6.Improve the food at all regional and national shows.
7. Provide for the adequate flow of niceness at show as well as clean underwear
8. Take all of the over scrubbed, washed out, dipped out ugly crud that has been overhanging
the market for years, issue Federal Bonds to buy them , melt them into purified bars for the
strategic metal reserve.
9. Price controls shall be placed on nice coins so that average collectors can afford to buy them.
10. Coin minnows, guppies, goldfish , sardines and anchovies shall be force fed untill they are whales.
11. Hunting permits will be issued, for year round shooting of bears on sight.
12. Jelly donuts will be banned for health reasons and the fact that they make the coins very sticky.
13. Ignorent and irritating collectors and dealers, will be sent to mandatory education and niceness camps.
14. Regulate the hight , weight, age and shoe size of all coin dealers.
There once was a place called
Camelot
Camelot
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Camelot
Worry is the interest you pay on a debt you may not owe.
"Paper money eventually returns to its intrinsic value---zero."----Voltaire
"Everything you say should be true, but not everything true should be said."----Voltaire
the Government stock pile of Ike Dollars and keep all of the peglegs
and other BS varieties they can find.
Camelot
......hey bear! are you stealin' or just borrowing my quotes?
Camelot
<< <i>Like Milton Berle, I steal only the good stuff.
......
.......much like OTHER czars!
Edit
<< <i>The Coin Czar, in addition to a large salery, will get to look thru the Government stock pile of Ike Dollars and keep all of the peglegs and other BS varieties they can find. >>
I'll take that job just for that perk
Then Hire Bear to do the enforcement
I think what we need is a single payer ego system to level the playing field.
In order to implement this new bureaucracy, a new 'standing currency tax' of 5% per year is imposed on the current assessed market value of all coins that collectors hold.
Payments may be made quarterly for the collectors convenience.
<< <i>The “Coin Tsar” would need some mechanism to impose decisions. He, or the Tsarina, would want a cadre of “Coin Cops” to enforce rules, and an army of “Coin Clerks” to generate forms and process complete ones. (This could be modeled on corporate HMOs to provide minimum efficiency at maximum profit to the Tsar’s organization.) A secret organization of coin spies would be needed to conduct surveillance of the faithful and punishment of transgressors following the successful model of Papal Inquisitions. There would also need to be a “Committee on the Calcification of Knowledge” to suppress heretical ideas and maintain purity of information. There should also be appropriate rituals such as “The Laying of Hands at Lot Viewing,” and “Baptism of the Neophyte and Statehood Quarter Collector.” Of course, the inner bureaucracy would protect the Great Secrets: “Masters of Doctoring,” and “Fornicatious Fabrication.” >>
.......quite a coincopia.
<< <i>What we need is a COIN CZAR or even a cute czarena
>>
Will the new czarena toss the coins in the air and shoot holes in 'em like ...Annie Oakley....
in order to promote competition. Perhaps it even could offer vaccinations
and health physicals.It is estimated that 90% of collectors and dealers are
crazy. For all we know, it could be even higher. Due to global warming, craziness
may even supersaturate to over 100%.
Those that violate the Coin Tzars unilateral dictates, will be sent to holding pens
in New Jersey. If we find that there are not enough pens, we can use pencils.
Camelot
Has anyone said ... "be careful what you ask for?"
Or, as I saw on a facebook flair button ...
please don't tell _____ (fill in the blank) what comes after a trillion
as good as we hope for,
nor as bad as we fear".
"There is nothing to fear, but, war, inflation, deflation, unemployment, bankruptcy,
recession, Swine Flu, Lime disease,sexual inadequacy, constipation and sardonic humor.
Camelot