Should I keep it a secret?
1989FleerBillRipkencollector
Posts: 4,590
My situation-I rec'd a unexpected $2,500 bonus from work. Well $1700 after taxes. This is not the "normal" bonus that I get.
My wife is unaware of it.
We live comfortably and I am the sole provider.
ALL of my paychecks go to the family.
My only source of income to buy is from flipping.
There is the occasional $10 Target spree that I use our $$.
I used to use our $$ but when money would get tight I would always hear it so I decided to use my own $$.
I want to keep it as I have nothing really left to sell or any $$ to invest in more items to re-sell.
Aside from FF versions and fun of cracking 89 F cases I collect Star Wars Troopers. There is 15+ new ones coming this year and I dont have any $$ saved for them.
Im torn as Im generally a honest person and feel I "earned" to keep this and if she was aware I would maybe get $100 of it and quite honestly $1000 of it would get blown at Target on crap we dont need. The other $600 would go to credit cards. I paid them off before with the majority of the $$ coming from me selling some items but they slowly got built back up so Im not in a rush to pay them off esp. selling my items to do it.
What would you do? I have'nt cashed the check yet but I feel guilt. Will a few rack cases of 89 F erase the guilt?
My wife is unaware of it.
We live comfortably and I am the sole provider.
ALL of my paychecks go to the family.
My only source of income to buy is from flipping.
There is the occasional $10 Target spree that I use our $$.
I used to use our $$ but when money would get tight I would always hear it so I decided to use my own $$.
I want to keep it as I have nothing really left to sell or any $$ to invest in more items to re-sell.
Aside from FF versions and fun of cracking 89 F cases I collect Star Wars Troopers. There is 15+ new ones coming this year and I dont have any $$ saved for them.
Im torn as Im generally a honest person and feel I "earned" to keep this and if she was aware I would maybe get $100 of it and quite honestly $1000 of it would get blown at Target on crap we dont need. The other $600 would go to credit cards. I paid them off before with the majority of the $$ coming from me selling some items but they slowly got built back up so Im not in a rush to pay them off esp. selling my items to do it.
What would you do? I have'nt cashed the check yet but I feel guilt. Will a few rack cases of 89 F erase the guilt?
0
Comments
I would pay off all of my CC debt b4 I bought
ANY toys.
I would put ALL of the money in a savings account,
or buy a US Savings Bond. Then, foget about it for
five-years.
I would pay down my mortgage principal.
////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////
Few folks believe me, but I know that we are headed
for a prolonged period where cash will be king. Card
prices are a few kisses away from going into the toilet
for a good long time.
SAVE your cash. You and your family will be glad you did.
Forget blocking him; find out where he lives and go punch him in the nuts. --WalterSobchak 9/12/12
Looking for Al Hrabosky and any OPC Dave Campbells (the ESPN guy)
<-----me...taking the money for the love of the hobby!!!!!!
"The Villain"
Shiba Rescue Organization
A Shiba Inu is a terrible thing to waste!
<< <i>
Few folks believe me, but I know that we are headed
for a prolonged period where cash will be king. Card
prices are a few kisses away from going into the toilet
for a good long time.
SAVE your cash. You and your family will be glad you did. >>
I believe you storm--that's the one thing me and my wife are really focusing on right now...
Forget blocking him; find out where he lives and go punch him in the nuts. --WalterSobchak 9/12/12
Looking for Al Hrabosky and any OPC Dave Campbells (the ESPN guy)
<< <i>OPTIONS:
I would pay off all of my CC debt b4 I bought
ANY toys.
I would put ALL of the money in a savings account,
or buy a US Savings Bond. Then, foget about it for
five-years.
I would pay down my mortgage principal.
////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////
Few folks believe me, but I know that we are headed
for a prolonged period where cash will be king. Card
prices are a few kisses away from going into the toilet
for a good long time.
SAVE your cash. You and your family will be glad you did. >>
Can you elaborate on your statements, Storm? You have a very cryptic tone in these statements...
I say bank that bankroll and keep it for a rainy day. She doesnt need to know until you surprise her with a cruise or a big tv!
<< <i>My wife and I made a rule before we got married, NO exceptions - we will never argue over money. >>
all the more reason not to tell her..
<< <i>all the more reason not to tell her.. >>
The first rule was about honesty.....
"The Villain"
Shiba Rescue Organization
A Shiba Inu is a terrible thing to waste!
Of course the cards you buy w/ the $200/$300 will probably need to be sold at a future date to pay down your credit card bills, but at least it gives you time to buy/flip a few times and put a few more cards into your permanant collection
Carpe diem
Collectors always need to fib just a little ...
<< <i>Stown is probably a little older than the majority of us "whipper-snappers" on here and probably has the right to be more cynical. I would suggest to save 60% of the bonus and spend the rest!
Carpe diem >>
What did I do?!? I'm only 33
You must have meant storm
<< <i>Im torn as Im generally a honest person and feel I "earned" to keep this and if she was aware I would maybe get $100 of it and quite honestly $1000 of it would get blown at Target on crap we dont need >>
Donovan
The only thing I'll be able to take to my grave is the love and trust I've developed over 26 yrs. of marriage with Mary.
mike
Tell her what happened and that you would like some of it to spend on your collection. Even a couple of hundred is a nice piece of play money. And you will sleep better at night knowing that you told the truth, you spent most of the money on your family and that you were able to spoil yourself a bit too.
Either way you go, please let us know how it turned out.
//////////////////////////////////////////
Nothing cryptic.
I am old and have lived through lots of economic-cycles.
I know what the economic world looks like when changes
are on the horizon.
The sad/glad fact is that the majority of folks are ALWAYS
wrong about what sundry economic signs really mean.
Today, we are watching the sheeple sell their commodities
to raise money to buy into the rigged stock-market. The
cheerleaders on CNBC are actually saying, "You cannot
take your eyes off this screen for the next 30-minutes
because we are headed for a new all-time high."
Soon, folks will be covering their margin calls. The pain
will trickle down like never b4.
America is not going under; the govt will NOT allow the
currency to fail --- it will strengthen beyond what most
folks can even imagine.
I have played the mid-range collectibles game for nearly
50-years. NONE of the stuff has any value at all, EXCEPT
for that value that is assigned by discretionary income
flows. It is good to trade it, fun to enjoy it, but very silly
to think of it as a storehouse of value/wealth.
I have experienced 4.25% mortgage rates, and 21% mortgage
rates. I know what bubbles look like, and I know what happens
when they burst. Houses are shelter, not ATM machines. The
reckoning on that issue is going to shock EVERYBODY, and it is
close; though, the day and the hour knoweth no man.
I am NOT saying "do not have fun." I am saying be cautious.
When you see average people looking at things as "investments"
- that you KNOW are NOT investments - it is time to step back
and start getting yourself prepared. Keeping your powder dry
and waiting to buy when everybody else MUST sell, is the best
strategy.
Hedge a bit with gold/silver, if you wish. Enjoy the hobby-cards.
BUT, remember that "cash" is and always will be the currency of the
realm in America. The ability of MOST folks to get their hands on
very much of that stuff is likely about to be curtailed in a harsh way.
Tulip Bulbs, anyone?
Say $150 a piece.
Bank the rest. Its much harder to save a thousand month to month.
Loves me some shiny!
<< <i>Keeping your powder dry
and waiting to buy when everybody else MUST sell, is the best
strategy. >>
AMEN!
Too many 5-year ARMs and not enough equity makes potential buying opportunities plentiful
Oh, and as to the orginial subject, don't take this the wrong way 89FFRipkenCollector, but based on what you've posted here it sounds like you may be resentful of your wife's spending habits, and how they affect your finaces? Not to get too personal, but you may want to sit down with her & have a looong talk about this.
$500 Savings Bond (I have quite a few $50 ones I have bought)
$200 her and $200 me
$800 bills.
Im going to buy the Bond 1st because I know as soon as I come home with the full amount it would get spent before I knew it.
Your right I'll sleep better at night as I do have a conscience.
Thanks for all the input guys. It helped. I was leaning to keeping the whole amount but know it will come back to haunt me.
Donovan
So anyways, anyone selling a PSA 1 '52 Mantle ? j/k
If she were somehow to find out that you got that kind of dough and didn't tell her?
It would be a hard road to hoe back down that narrow path. Take that from a guy who's made all the mistakes.
Heck - the T3 I just posted? Haven't told Mary yet!
mike
edit: BTW - on the secret? The only way that's fer sure between two people is if one is 6 feet under!
<< <i>Heck - the T3 I just posted? Haven't told Mary yet! >>
Oh oh! Well Stone, it's been nice having you around again.
Thankfully summer is almost here, the doghouse shouldn't be too cold.
<< <i>Wow Storm ,that's some heavy stuff..I'd actually like to know more about it.Do others feel the same way? >>
He's certainly not alone. If you take a look at Amazon, there's a bunch of books that have come out in the past year or so that are predicting "financial armageddon". Considering the fact that I'm a cautious optimist and that it will take a near perfect storm of events colliding at the same time to lead to what some of these authors are predicting, I don't think it will be necessarily "armageddon". I DO, however, think that we could be in for a very bumpy ride over the next few years.
First off, I agree that lying to your spouse is not the optimum way to go. If she ever asked you about it, would be able to look her in the eye and say "honey, yes I did get a $1700 bonus and I spent it on....whatever...." ? It's not for me to judge you but if you can answer with a clear conscious, then that's an option.
I'm in sales and I own my own business so I have three sets of accounting; ours, mine, and my business. I can spend my "mine" anyway I see fit. My wife has her own "mine" money which she does with as she wishes. If your wife doesn't have her own separate stash (and if you want yours) than I really like the idea of taking the money and splitting it. This allows you each a chance to pay bills, splurge or save, you each get a choice. Nothing could be more fair, right?
On the point of saving, PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE do not buy a savings bond. Heck, a bank CD is insured by the same company (US Gov) and pays more interest. Paying bills - if they are high rate credit cards are your best way to get ahead but if you don't have those then what? If you are considering paying down the mortgage...you better have a interest rate above 9% if you're going to prepay or you are again wasting money by paying down debt with cheap money...costing you money once more.
Mike
EDIT: If any of you have savings bonds....please cash them in and buy a 6 month CD....You'll do sooooo much better in the long run.
Kirby Puckett Master Set
To spare the suspence and length I won $14,000 playing poker over the three nights. Now $14,000 to me is a good month of sales, so it was like an extra paycheck. I immediatly called my wife and told her about my good fortune. Of course she had alist of all the things we needed or wanted by the time I came home. Her list was her way of sharing in the good fortune. She enjoyed helping plan the spending as much as I enjoyed winning it, for sure!
In the end, $2000 was banked for taxes, $6,000 went to home improvements, $3000 took family to Disney Land in CA for a week, $2000 went to my fun money account, $1000 went to her fun money account (This was her idea - consession for $3000 for family trip to which I agreed).
We don't have credit card bills or loans beyond a low rate mortgage and a small school loan, so home improvements and a family trip was where most of it went.
Just thought you might like a real life example that worked out great for all of us.
Mike
Kirby Puckett Master Set
You'll do sooooo much better in the long run."
/////////////////////////////////
That is NOT untrue.
But, if the choice is save or squander, the Savings Bond is an adequate choice.
Pre-paying mortgages with "expensive" money is also bad. BUT, again, if
the choice is to save/squander, a prepayment accrues to the bottom-line
at the back-end.
"Cheap money" is obtained via hedges. That is the money that wiseguys
use to pre-pay their mortgages.
Example: $500K mortgage. Hedge silver at $5.00 (or $13.30, or whatever).
When the metal price doubles/triples, those profits are "cheap" dollars and
should be used to pay off/down mortgage principal that is denominated in
"expensive" dollars. (Tax consequences are not considered in the example.)
I wanted to use a 1952 Mantle in the above example, but I just could not
see a way for it to work at today's prices.
The end of the world is not on the way. I am ONLY counseling caution, thrift,
and building for a better future. Young folks who think poverty sucks will
have a whole new persepective on how BAD it sucks when they get old, IF
they have not made the right moves NOW.
<< <i>"EDIT: If any of you have savings bonds....please cash them in and buy a 6 month CD....
You'll do sooooo much better in the long run."
/////////////////////////////////
That is NOT untrue.
But, if the choice is save or squander, the Savings Bond is an adequate choice.
Pre-paying mortgages with "expensive" money is also bad. BUT, again, if
the choice is to save/squander, a prepayment accrues to the bottom-line
at the back-end.
"Cheap money" is obtained via hedges. That is the money that wiseguys
use to pre-pay their mortgages.
Example: $500K mortgage. Hedge silver at $5.00 (or $13.30, or whatever).
When the metal price doubles/triples, those profits are "cheap" dollars and
should be used to pay off/down mortgage principal that is denominated in
"expensive" dollars. (Tax consequences are not considered in the example.)
I wanted to use a 1952 Mantle in the above example, but I just could not
see a way for it to work at today's prices.
The end of the world is not on the way. I am ONLY counseling caution, thrift,
and building for a better future. Young folks who think poverty sucks will
have a whole new persepective on how BAD it sucks when they get old, IF
they have not made the right moves NOW.
Storm,
Tax consequence is the main reason not to pay down the mortgage, so you can't say it's a good/bad idea without taking that into consideration.... as it is THE reason paying down at today’s low rates is wrong; other than the obvious rate comparison.
AGREED that saving vs spending is the better choice
While I agree that the future value of a commodity would be cheap IF it were worth multiples of what you buy it today, that's not realistic. Sure, I bought gold at $360 8-10 years ago but the commodity trader isn't buying this for the long haul, generally. It's generally bought as a short term hedge bet as the long term performance of the US stock market is unequaled for investors seeking only return, regardless of volatility. Hedging just doesn't make sense to an investor unless they have assets and purchasing power to protect. Hedging for your average investor is a way to reduce volatility....not increase return.
As to your statement that buying 6mo CD is untrue....I have to disagree. Over broad economic cycles short term high quality paper always outperforms savings bonds. Savings bonds generally pay about 4%. Even when CD's and short term rates were 2% a couple years ago they are more than made up for when rates were twice that a few years earlier and savings bonds were paying....oh yeah about 4%. Over the short term I can find a couple years where savings bonds outperformed CD's but I can find more examples where CD rates were 1.5x to 2X savings bond rates. When we discuss savings bonds we are generally taking EE bonds and since EE bonds are considered 10 year investments.....Savings bonds are not a good investment....period.
Now if we want to talk lead and copper.....
Mike
Kirby Puckett Master Set
//////////////////////////////////
I said "NOT untrue."
I could have just said, "true," but I said, "not untrue."
Is there a down side to CD's?
//////////////////////
"Substantial Penalty For Early Withdrawal"
The $20 bucks is not the important part. The important part
is that you will NOT have squandered the $500.
Never lie to your Wife.*
Second word:
Tell her everything.*
That way when you forget something, you can bet she won't - and it won't come back to bite you in the butt.
*Note: Does not apply to whether her new jeans make her look fat, or if her new hairstyle is better than her old.
If you ladder them, it minimizes the risk of early withdrawal since they are maturing more often.
Storm had a super point !!!!!!!! Financial independence begins when you don't owe anybody a dime !!!!!!!!!!
Pay it all down to nothing..................
You certainly wouldn't walk into a store and checkout with an item and offer to pay MORE for it would you?
If there is anything left after that, split it and blow it as you both please.
She's rather crafty with money and perhaps this "hit" won't hurt as bad as I had first thought.
I'm going back to enjoying cards again. If she lets me keep 'em.
Oh, by the way, tell your wife about your little windfall.
<< <i>
<< <i>Heck - the T3 I just posted? Haven't told Mary yet! >>
Oh oh! Well Stone, it's been nice having you around again.
Thankfully summer is almost here, the doghouse shouldn't be too cold.
Ted
I just told her.
And I STILL have all my protruding body parts!
I have a great wife guys.
mike
1. Write a check to your church for $170. Give thanks where it belongs.
2. Give your wife $265 for whatever she wants to spend it on.
3. Give yourself $265
4. Bank $1000
You'll sleep well, get some joy from it, and be $1k ahead of the game.
"Molon Labe"
<< <i>Im torn as Im generally a honest person and feel I "earned" to keep this and if she was aware I would maybe get $100 of it and quite honestly $1000 of it would get blown at Target on crap we dont need. The other $600 would go to credit cards. I paid them off before with the majority of the $$ coming from me selling some items but they slowly got built back up so Im not in a rush to pay them off esp. selling my items to do it. >>
This is the comment that bothers me.
How did the credit cards get built back up? Was it her fault?
Does she spend $1000 on crap at Target often?
If you're working as hard as you do to be the sole provider for the family, you should be able to spend at least part of a well-deserved bonus on something you love. In the meantime, maybe discuss spending habits with your wife and establish some guidelines. It sounds like you are contributing far more than her in terms of money, and she needs to respect certain spending boundaries.
All of the stuff in this world is not worth the love and trust of a good wife. You will be much happier long after all of that money is gone.
Collector of Pittsburgh Pirates cards for a slightly less stupid reason.
My Pirates Collection
Yeah, plus sleeping on the sofa ain't much fun
<< <i>"As to your statement that buying 6mo CD is untrue....I have to disagree. "
//////////////////////////////////
I said "NOT untrue."
I could have just said, "true," but I said, "not untrue."
Storm, sorry missed the double neg. My bad.
Kirby Puckett Master Set