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The New Tales of Coinalot...Good Morning class (THE ROYAL COIN COLLECTION)
Bear
Posts: 18,954 ✭✭
This episode is dedicated to that wonderful pugnacious pug.....Frank.
No sweeter soul ever existed on this Forum and Frank will be missed
as one misses the sunlight or a gentle summer rain.........
Ms Coinboard...Good morning class
Class................Good morning Ms Coinboard
Ms Coinboard...Russ dear, please stop poking Cheryl in the head.
Russ.................Gee whiz, I never get to have any fun.
Ms Coinboard ..Ken, stop shooting paper clips at Old Bear. You can put
out his eye doing that.
Airplanenut......Ms Coinboard, tell us a story.
Class...............All shouting together..Yes Ms Coinboard A story.
Ms Coinboard..All right dears, a story there shall be.
The Royal Coin Collection
It was a bright summer day in the Land of Coinalot. All was as it should be in
the Kingdom. King ArtR had called a meeting of the Royal Coin Round Table. Sitting
around the table were all of the great minds of the Kingdom.....OK,..... some of the minds were
not so great.
Also requested to appear was Sir David of Hall. He was to be questioned about
the mysterious doings at the PCGS Castle.
St Feldolini......Sire, may I pose a hypothetical question?
King ArtR.........Feldolini, thou art barely dry from your last baptism in the Bay of EE. Ask not again
lest I become vexed with thee. Next time you aggrevate the TEMPER ROYAL, it will not be the royal catapault,
but ye shall be taken to the........Cher.....Wood....Forest.
St Feldolini.....Good heavens my King, Not that, anything but that. Tis an evil Forest ruled by the Lady That doth
keeps Parrots. All manner of evil plucking abounds about therin. Spare me my King.
King ArtR.......We shall speak no more upon it
However Sir Clankeye, tis time we had you tell a tale .How long must we endure your apprentice,
that big, old furry Bear, when we could hear a story from the lips of the Master Bard himself.
Sir Bear..........Majesty, I resemble that remark. I am doing the best that I can. Tis not an easy matter to fill in for
the Master. All I ever get is abuse, more abuse and an occassional shooting.
King ArtR.......What say you Master Bard?
Sir Clankeye..All is, but a Mid Summer's Night Dream your highness
King ArtR, Be that as it May Sir Bard, Take the rags out and doth produce one of your golden eggs.
Sir Clankeye..But Sire, I am not a chicken.
King ArtR.......Thou art, what ever the King says thou art. I expect a clutch of golden stories or else tis Cher..Wood Forest for thee.
Sir Clankee...GULP!..Yes your majesty.
King ArtR.......Down to the bussiness of this roundtable.
......................All of a sudden, in dances Mad Marty. A sack of bones, clothes made up of bags, rags and tatters, topped with a hank of hair.
King ArtR.......Mad Marty,tis not fitting that thou be the Royal Lunitic. What art thou truly like?
Mad Marty.....Sire, I am as mad as a fox and as funny as a ferrett.
King ArtR........Is It true, that thou hast visited all the coin stores in the kingdom and hath RIPPETH, EACH IN TURN,
A NEW ONE?
Mad Marty..... Verily your Highness, I have indeed ripethed away.
King ArtR ......From this day foward Mad Marty, thou shall serve me as the Royal Jester. Go now and visit the royal tailor.
Mad Marty......And what of my rubber chicken , Majesty?
King ArtR........He shall also be suitably garbed. Now, away with you both.
King ArtR....Tell me my Lords, of these nefarious Coin Doctors that doeth disturb the coinage of my Realm.
Sir Keets....Well sire, they have opened Coin Health Clinics thruought the Land.
King ArtR...What doeth these makers of numismatic mayhem, at these clinics.
Sir Keets...They bleach, erase, putty, tone, thumb and turneth dross POS into prime coinage my King.
King ArtR...This is found acceptable by the Hobby?
Sir Keets.. Well Sire, the Doctors produce wealth where none existed before. They take a 100 dollar coin
and by use of alchemy, tone that sucker into a 10,000 Huan coin. Even the Royal Minter could not tell for sure.
The Doctor does well, the dealers who seek the Doctors treatment do well, the collectors lust for toners is
sated and all seem happy it wouldeth appear.
King ArtR..What of the Possum Posse my lords, doth they not seek to apprehend the scoundrels?
Sir Keet.. The Posse hath eyes but seeith not, they hath ears, but hearest not, they hath braines,
but knoweth not what to do. All here know, that the Doctors are...Drs Larry, Curly and Moe.
King ArtR.............If that be so, then what of the efforts of the Castle of PCGS Sir David?
Sir David of Hall..Sire we have hired a consultant to single out such monastrous atrocities that attempt to
be slabbed .
King ArtR.........Who be this consultant , Sir David.
Sir David,....... It be non other then Mad Marties Rubber Chicken my King.
King ArtR.........A Rubber Chichen you say?
Sir David......., Sire the chicken hath attended more coin shows then most dealers. Tis a wise and qualified chicken indeed.
King ArtR.........Tis well then, the problem seems well in hand Sir David.
................Then King ArtR calls upon the holder of the Royal coin Collecton, Lady Laura of Legend to bring it forth.
Lady Laura....... Whats the matter with you, your majesty,........ arms and legs broken?
King ArtR...........Stay the acerbic wit Lady Laura, I payeth thee 10% to build the Royal Collection and if thou doest
not wish me to deal with the Wannabees, bringeth forth my Collection.
King ArtR...........Sir David, I would knoweth of the black magic you doth employ, to grade the coins of the Realm. Telleth me
the names of those appointed the High Lords of Grading?
Sir David............Well your Majesty we have.....OLD BLIND BOB,.....ONE EYED LOUIE.....CRAZY CARL..WIERD WILLIE....and HAPELESS HAL.
Of course we also have Mad Marties RUBBER CHICKEN.
King ArtR............What if thy High Lords of Grading are in debate as to the grade.
Sir David............ In the event there is DEBATE, then we refer the matter to the MASTER.. BATER... for resolution.
King ArtR............How exactly are the coins graded?
Sir David ............Let us take , for example, OLD BLIND BOB. BOB takes 5, fourteen sided dice and rolls it. The markings on the
dice are from 1-14, an apprentice reads the sum total of the dice rolled and that becomes the grade.
King ArtR............Somewhat arbitrary , wouldnt you say Sir David?
Sir David.............No Sire, Its the luck of the roll. The more you play ,the better the chance of winning.
As for the Royal Collection and their grades Sire, send them in for Presidential Review.
I shall roll the dice myself.
King ArtR........ .. Oh right, that will really relieve the Royal Consternation.
And thus ends another exciting day in the Land of Coinalot. Mad Marty has been made Royal Jester, The Rubber Chicken
has a job, the coin doctors are under survellience , the royal Coin Collection will get the Presidental roll of the dice and all
is as it should be .
Tune in next Monday and find out more about the mysterious and sinister, Cher...Wood Forest . What will
King ArtR do about whether or not to change back the monetary standard, from the Chinese Huan to the Royal Ducat
Ms Coinboard....allright class, story telling time is over. Tumuss, please take your finger out of your nose
and Claw, sit up straight dear and put down the picture of President Bush.
I KNOW ITS A DAY EARLY........SO SUE ME!!
No sweeter soul ever existed on this Forum and Frank will be missed
as one misses the sunlight or a gentle summer rain.........
Ms Coinboard...Good morning class
Class................Good morning Ms Coinboard
Ms Coinboard...Russ dear, please stop poking Cheryl in the head.
Russ.................Gee whiz, I never get to have any fun.
Ms Coinboard ..Ken, stop shooting paper clips at Old Bear. You can put
out his eye doing that.
Airplanenut......Ms Coinboard, tell us a story.
Class...............All shouting together..Yes Ms Coinboard A story.
Ms Coinboard..All right dears, a story there shall be.
The Royal Coin Collection
It was a bright summer day in the Land of Coinalot. All was as it should be in
the Kingdom. King ArtR had called a meeting of the Royal Coin Round Table. Sitting
around the table were all of the great minds of the Kingdom.....OK,..... some of the minds were
not so great.
Also requested to appear was Sir David of Hall. He was to be questioned aboutthe mysterious doings at the PCGS Castle.
St Feldolini......Sire, may I pose a hypothetical question?
King ArtR.........Feldolini, thou art barely dry from your last baptism in the Bay of EE. Ask not again
lest I become vexed with thee. Next time you aggrevate the TEMPER ROYAL, it will not be the royal catapault,
but ye shall be taken to the........Cher.....Wood....Forest.
St Feldolini.....Good heavens my King, Not that, anything but that. Tis an evil Forest ruled by the Lady That doth
keeps Parrots. All manner of evil plucking abounds about therin. Spare me my King.
King ArtR.......We shall speak no more upon it
However Sir Clankeye, tis time we had you tell a tale .How long must we endure your apprentice,
that big, old furry Bear, when we could hear a story from the lips of the Master Bard himself.
Sir Bear..........Majesty, I resemble that remark. I am doing the best that I can. Tis not an easy matter to fill in for
the Master. All I ever get is abuse, more abuse and an occassional shooting.
King ArtR.......What say you Master Bard?
Sir Clankeye..All is, but a Mid Summer's Night Dream your highness
King ArtR, Be that as it May Sir Bard, Take the rags out and doth produce one of your golden eggs.
Sir Clankeye..But Sire, I am not a chicken.
King ArtR.......Thou art, what ever the King says thou art. I expect a clutch of golden stories or else tis Cher..Wood Forest for thee.
Sir Clankee...GULP!..Yes your majesty.
King ArtR.......Down to the bussiness of this roundtable.
......................All of a sudden, in dances Mad Marty. A sack of bones, clothes made up of bags, rags and tatters, topped with a hank of hair.
King ArtR.......Mad Marty,tis not fitting that thou be the Royal Lunitic. What art thou truly like?
Mad Marty.....Sire, I am as mad as a fox and as funny as a ferrett.
King ArtR........Is It true, that thou hast visited all the coin stores in the kingdom and hath RIPPETH, EACH IN TURN,
A NEW ONE?
Mad Marty..... Verily your Highness, I have indeed ripethed away.
King ArtR ......From this day foward Mad Marty, thou shall serve me as the Royal Jester. Go now and visit the royal tailor.
Mad Marty......And what of my rubber chicken , Majesty?
King ArtR........He shall also be suitably garbed. Now, away with you both.
King ArtR....Tell me my Lords, of these nefarious Coin Doctors that doeth disturb the coinage of my Realm.
Sir Keets....Well sire, they have opened Coin Health Clinics thruought the Land.
King ArtR...What doeth these makers of numismatic mayhem, at these clinics.
Sir Keets...They bleach, erase, putty, tone, thumb and turneth dross POS into prime coinage my King.
King ArtR...This is found acceptable by the Hobby?
Sir Keets.. Well Sire, the Doctors produce wealth where none existed before. They take a 100 dollar coin
and by use of alchemy, tone that sucker into a 10,000 Huan coin. Even the Royal Minter could not tell for sure.
The Doctor does well, the dealers who seek the Doctors treatment do well, the collectors lust for toners is
sated and all seem happy it wouldeth appear.
King ArtR..What of the Possum Posse my lords, doth they not seek to apprehend the scoundrels?
Sir Keet.. The Posse hath eyes but seeith not, they hath ears, but hearest not, they hath braines,
but knoweth not what to do. All here know, that the Doctors are...Drs Larry, Curly and Moe.
King ArtR.............If that be so, then what of the efforts of the Castle of PCGS Sir David?
Sir David of Hall..Sire we have hired a consultant to single out such monastrous atrocities that attempt to
be slabbed .
King ArtR.........Who be this consultant , Sir David.
Sir David,....... It be non other then Mad Marties Rubber Chicken my King.
King ArtR.........A Rubber Chichen you say?
Sir David......., Sire the chicken hath attended more coin shows then most dealers. Tis a wise and qualified chicken indeed.
King ArtR.........Tis well then, the problem seems well in hand Sir David.
................Then King ArtR calls upon the holder of the Royal coin Collecton, Lady Laura of Legend to bring it forth.
Lady Laura....... Whats the matter with you, your majesty,........ arms and legs broken?
King ArtR...........Stay the acerbic wit Lady Laura, I payeth thee 10% to build the Royal Collection and if thou doest
not wish me to deal with the Wannabees, bringeth forth my Collection.
King ArtR...........Sir David, I would knoweth of the black magic you doth employ, to grade the coins of the Realm. Telleth me
the names of those appointed the High Lords of Grading?
Sir David............Well your Majesty we have.....OLD BLIND BOB,.....ONE EYED LOUIE.....CRAZY CARL..WIERD WILLIE....and HAPELESS HAL.
Of course we also have Mad Marties RUBBER CHICKEN.
King ArtR............What if thy High Lords of Grading are in debate as to the grade.
Sir David............ In the event there is DEBATE, then we refer the matter to the MASTER.. BATER... for resolution.
King ArtR............How exactly are the coins graded?
Sir David ............Let us take , for example, OLD BLIND BOB. BOB takes 5, fourteen sided dice and rolls it. The markings on the
dice are from 1-14, an apprentice reads the sum total of the dice rolled and that becomes the grade.
King ArtR............Somewhat arbitrary , wouldnt you say Sir David?
Sir David.............No Sire, Its the luck of the roll. The more you play ,the better the chance of winning.
As for the Royal Collection and their grades Sire, send them in for Presidential Review.
I shall roll the dice myself.
King ArtR........ .. Oh right, that will really relieve the Royal Consternation.
And thus ends another exciting day in the Land of Coinalot. Mad Marty has been made Royal Jester, The Rubber Chicken
has a job, the coin doctors are under survellience , the royal Coin Collection will get the Presidental roll of the dice and all
is as it should be .
Tune in next Monday and find out more about the mysterious and sinister, Cher...Wood Forest . What will
King ArtR do about whether or not to change back the monetary standard, from the Chinese Huan to the Royal Ducat
Ms Coinboard....allright class, story telling time is over. Tumuss, please take your finger out of your nose
and Claw, sit up straight dear and put down the picture of President Bush.
I KNOW ITS A DAY EARLY........SO SUE ME!!
There once was a place called
Camelot
Camelot
0
Comments
Nicely done Bear.
Brian
Cher-Wood Forest Aviary
POTD - May 26, 2005
Paul
Stuart
Collect 18th & 19th Century US Type Coins, Silver Dollars, $20 Gold Double Eagles and World Crowns & Talers with High Eye Appeal
"Luck is what happens when Preparation meets Opportunity"
<< <i>All is, but a Mid Summer's Night Dream your highness >>
That really is about what I would say, Bear.
Bear... you're an asset to the Kingdom. In fact, were Cladking not next in line--I would think you should be King of the kingdom.
King Bear. Has a nice ring.
Good job.
Remember: don't be too mean to Russ. He's fragile.
Clankeye
<< <i>Remember: don't be too mean to Russ. He's fragile. >>
Pfffft!!!
Looking for PCGS AU58 Washington's, 32-63.
U.S. Nickels Complete Set with Major Varieties, Circulation Strikes
U.S. Dimes Complete Set with Major Varieties, Circulation Strikes
Joe
Great story.
But arn't the TPGs going to get mad that you giving away there grading methods?
(Priest) BLASPHEMY he said it again, did you hear him?
Camelot
Capped Bust Half Series
Capped Bust Half Dime Series
42/92
K
Camelot