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"Good Morning Class" -- I Wonder What The King Is Doing Tonight?

ClankeyeClankeye Posts: 3,928 ✭
in U.S. Coin Forum
In the kingdom of Coinalot people are starting to whisper

Sir Tonelover: Me thinks his Majesty is in a foul mood!
Sir Outhaul: Why sayest thou?
Sir Tonelover: He just had Sir Iwog dipped, whizzed and puttied!
Sir GTOster: GADZOOKS! But why?
Sir Cdmead: He said his bright armor was hurting his eyes.
Sir Marcmoish: But would this not make him brighter?
Sir Cdmead: He dipped him 300 times.
Sir Bear: HA! 'Tis a pity I missed it!
Lord Zerbe: (drawing off his pipe) There are those that say King ArtR has been different since his recent travels....
Sir Kranky: WHY?? Because he had Karl of Dork sewn back together, ripped to pieces again, and his vitals thrown into the Bay of Eee????! Show me the man who would not take pleasure in such!!!
Sir MrKelso: The Lady Lucy of Bop showed him her Frankies and got nary a rise out of him...
Sir Beartracks42: By the Gods! Now I'm worred.... hmmmmm.
Friar Numbori: I wonder what the King is doing tonight?

Cut to the turret office of Dr. Dpoole--Royal Head Shrinker. King ArtR is pacing around the room in an agitated manner

King ArtR: BY THE GODS! What good is it being King if nothing brings me pleasure!
Dr. Dpoole: You are depressed, your Majesty!
King ArtR: On whose authority!! I'll have them flogged!!
Dr. Dpoole: No, your Highness! Depressed. It is a state of mind. A containment of the spirit--an inability to feel joy.
King ArtR: What on earth could cause that?
Dr. Dpoole: Ummmmm... it's just a guess but... (quietly) coins?
King ArtR: (raging) COINS!!!!! COINS??? COINS ARE THE ROYAL HOBBY! MY LOVE! MY PLEASURE! MY RELAXATION!!!!
Dr. Dpoole: Did you not recently get a submission back from The Graders Who Charge Fees, your Highness?
King ArtR: (totally enraged) THE VILE DOGS!!!!!!!!!!

King ArtR unsheaths his sword Excoiniber and begins hacking at the floor

King ArtR: BAGGED! BAGGED! BAGGED! HOW DARE THEY BAGG'TH THE ROYAL COINAGE!! DO THEY CLAIM HIS MAJESTY CANNOT GRADE????!!!!!
Dr. Dpoole (jumping to his feet) Sire! SIRE!! CHILLETH! (he coaxes ArtR onto his couch) Lie back your Majesty. Good... just relax now. Sire... tell me about your childhood?
King ArtR: What's to tell? When I was twelve Coin Dealers burned my village, murdering everyone in sight. 'Twas a typical upbringing...
Dr. Dpoole: And how did this make you feel....?
King ArtR: (quietly) Dpoole....?
Dr. Dpoole: Yes, your Highness?
King ArtR: You shall stop with the Warm Fuzzy, or I shall have your guts for garters....
Dr. Dpoole: Yes, your Highness. (clearing throat) So... what's bugging you?
King ArtR: (his eyes mist over. A flicker of emotion passes his face) It's the Dark... I am haunted by it....
Dr. Dpoole: Ah! You are afraid of the dark! Not a problem your Majesty!
King ArtR: (sitting upright, intense) Not afraid of it!!! I seek it!!!! Suddenly I find I long for it!
Dr. Dpoole: Darkness, your Highness?
King ArtR: (walking to the window) Ever since that meddlesome Priestess Carolj took Coinalot to The Dark Side, I find I cannot stop thinking about it. I found comfort there. Comfort in the enveloping blackness which somehow removed my sight--yet--at the same time allowed me to see more clearly than ever before! ...I felt something there on The Dark Side, something I cannot describe!
Dr. Dpoole: From what I hear your Majesty it was only Jester Shiroh's hand on your buttock. Not to worry!
King ArtR: Doctor? Do you have next Monday at one o'clock open?
Dr. Dpoole: Why, yes I do your Highness!
King ArtR: (smiling) Good. That's when we shall hang you.

Later that night King ArtR tosses and turns in a restless bed. Suddenly he sits bolt upright, calling into the blackness

King ArtR: WHO GOES THERE? WHO WOULD DISTURB THE KING??

Sweat forms on ArtR's brow. A chill passes his face. He moves through the darkness toward the open window

King ArtR: (wary) I know who you are! THE SORCERER ASKARI -- CONJURER OF THE DARK!! YOU'VE COME TO TAKE ME! TAKE ME TO THE DARK SIDE! (he is fevered) TO LIVE FOREVER WRAPPED IN THE VELVET BLACKNESS OF TRUTH!!!

A small hand reaches out in the dark and cuppeth the Royal Buttock

King ArtR: (leaping) AAAARRRRRRRRRGGGGGHHHHHH!!!!!

King ArtR scrambles to light a torch. Standing there is Jester Shiroh

Jester Shiroh: (meekly) Sorry, your Majesty. Me thoughts you were a handrail!

Somewhere in the bowels of the castle, there is deep, maniacal laughter

BWWUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!!!

The sound winds it’s way up the staircase, through the turret, and into the Dark night sky

Squire Airplanenut: Cool.



Brevity is the soul of wit. --William Shakespeare

Comments

  • RegistryCoinRegistryCoin Posts: 5,117 ✭✭✭✭
    Wonderful Mondays... Thank You Sir Clankeye!
  • cosmicdebriscosmicdebris Posts: 12,332 ✭✭✭
    Carl you keepeth me in suspence for the next installment. Another great one!
    Bill

    image

    09/07/2006
  • ZerbeZerbe Posts: 587 ✭✭
    OMG ! This is by far the best !



    I thought this line at the beginning was going to be the best, but it just got better and better>>>>>>>>>>>>

    Sir MrKelso: The Lady Lucy of Bop showed him her Frankies and got nary a rise out of him


    Thanks Clank!!
  • BearBear Posts: 18,953 ✭✭✭
    The ever darkening gloom of the darkside has invadeth the relm. To arms I say,

    to arms.We must healeth our noble leige and lord, King ArtR. Bring on the court

    sorcerers, the royal wizards even the legendary Merlin must be roused from his sleep... If needeth be,

    we shall call on the dark arts of the local Riteaid Pharmacist. It is unseemly for doom and gloom

    to lay as a wet blanket over our glorious Relm. To Arms ,I say again, to Arms. We must war against the

    evil spirits that invadeth the royal cranium of our Noble King. Sir Bear

    There once was a place called
    Camelotimage
  • 1jester1jester Posts: 8,637 ✭✭✭
    Clankeye, how good of you to keep spreading the Darkness!!!

    I believe I heard an issue from MacCrimmon, did I not?!

    imageimageimage
    .....GOD
    image

    "Ask, and it shall be given you; seek, and ye shall find; knock, and it shall be opened unto you." -Luke 11:9

    "Hear, O Israel: The LORD our God is one LORD: And thou shalt love the LORD thy God with all thine heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy might." -Deut. 6:4-5

    "For the LORD is our judge, the LORD is our lawgiver, the LORD is our king; He will save us." -Isaiah 33:22
  • nwcsnwcs Posts: 13,386 ✭✭✭


    << <i>What's to tell? When I was twelve Coin Dealers burned my village, murdering everyone in sight. 'Twas a typical upbringing... >>

    The best line by far!!!!!!!!!!
    Blog and Pics
  • TassaTassa Posts: 2,373 ✭✭
    I love Mondays. Thank you Clankeye for creating and sharing yet another delightful tale. image
    Jade Rare Coin
    Jade Rare Coin eBay Listings
  • cosmicdebriscosmicdebris Posts: 12,332 ✭✭✭
    THE SORCERER ASKARI -- CONJURER OF THE DARK is not to be taken lightly. ArtR will fall under his power! image

    BWWUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!!!
    Bill

    image

    09/07/2006
  • Dog97Dog97 Posts: 7,874 ✭✭✭
    Askari's sphere of influence is getting out of hand. It's time for a regime change.
    Change that we can believe in is that change which is 90% silver.
  • MadMartyMadMarty Posts: 16,697 ✭✭✭
    Ahhhh, the week is complete! Thanks Clank!
    It is not exactly cheating, I prefer to consider it creative problem solving!!!

  • kieferscoinskieferscoins Posts: 10,017 ✭
    He should put the Good Guy in more often.

    Cameron Kiefer
  • coinguy1coinguy1 Posts: 13,484 ✭✭✭
    Yet another masterpiece - thanks Clankeye!

    I can't wait for the next "session" with dpoole, that is, if there is not a hanging, first!image

    Perhaps we should start a new thread which includes psychological advice for Clankeye - how to help him overcome his serious problem(S)? Heck, maybe we could all use some help like that!.image
  • cdmeadcdmead Posts: 121
    Another great story!! image

    And a small role to boot! image
    There's nothing in the rule book that says an elephant can't pitch.

    image
  • wingedlibertywingedliberty Posts: 4,805 ✭✭✭
    The best one so farimageimage


    Brian
  • AskariAskari Posts: 3,713 ✭


    << <i>King ArtR: What's to tell? When I was twelve Coin Dealers burned my village, murdering everyone in sight. 'Twas a typical upbringing... >>

    ROTFLMDAO!!! I about died laughing!! A rousing good yarn!! Thanks, Clankeye!! imageimageimage




    << <i>Bring on the court sorcerers, the royal wizards even the legendary Merlin must be roused from his sleep... >>

    Umm, Bear ... just what makes you so sure he isn't already awake?image
    Askari



    Come on over ... to The Dark Side! image
  • VonZipperVonZipper Posts: 707
    Three cheers for Lord Clankeye!!!!!!!!!!!image

    Pennies make dollars, and dollars make slabs!

    ....inflation must be kicking in again this dollar says spend by Dec. 31 2004!

    Erik
  • dorkkarldorkkarl Posts: 12,691 ✭✭✭


    << <i>WHY?? Because he had Karl of Dork sewn back together, ripped to pieces again, and his vitals thrown into the Bay of Eee????! >>

    whaaa.a...aatt???



    << <i>The Lady Lucy of Bop showed him her Frankies and got nary a rise out of him... >>

    never heard 'em called "frankies" before!

    K S
  • ClankeyeClankeye Posts: 3,928 ✭
    Sorry Karl, you're going to be showing up on eBay again.

    At least parts of you. image

    Off topic--

    a woman on the radio joked that she was bidding on Saddam Hussien's mustache on eBay...
    Another person said "eBay...? I thought that was one of his sons."

    Uday, Cousay, and Ebay... which would be more evil?


    Clankeye
    Brevity is the soul of wit. --William Shakespeare
  • airplanenutairplanenut Posts: 22,249 ✭✭✭✭✭
    That was more fun to read than my AP test! Cool! image
    JK Coin Photography - eBay Consignments | High Quality Photos | LOW Prices | 20% of Consignment Proceeds Go to Pancreatic Cancer Research
  • ursabearursabear Posts: 1,888
    Sir Clank!

    Mondays are so much better with your stories. Wonderful as always!

    Vive Coinalot!
  • BearBear Posts: 18,953 ✭✭✭
    ttt
    There once was a place called
    Camelotimage
  • GarneteyeGarneteye Posts: 1,168
    Nothing will make Monday a great day but at least it has 1 redeeming value, the continuing saga of coinalot

    Thanks for another great story!!

    Dan
    The glass is half full!
    image
  • cladkingcladking Posts: 28,701 ✭✭✭✭✭
    Bravo! Another classic.
    Tempus fugit.
  • beartracks42beartracks42 Posts: 2,834 ✭
    Mondays keep getting better and better. Can't wait for the next issue.


    I finally made an appearance, too. imageimageimage
    Gary
    image
  • DCAMFranklinDCAMFranklin Posts: 2,862 ✭✭
    Another fun read. Thanks Clank!


    image
  • cosmicdebriscosmicdebris Posts: 12,332 ✭✭✭
    See Below for new Cover
    Bill

    image

    09/07/2006
  • ClankeyeClankeye Posts: 3,928 ✭
    I love that picture, Bill!

    That coupled with the gorgeous French Walker in your sig line--I could stare at your post all day.

    Clankeye
    Brevity is the soul of wit. --William Shakespeare
  • smprfismprfi Posts: 874 ✭
    Great story,but you really don't want to go there.I hear they like to fondle their coins.Too dirty for me.Follow the light,and next time carry a torch that scares them.
    My Ebay Auctions
  • LucyBopLucyBop Posts: 14,001 ✭✭✭


    << <i>The Lady Lucy of Bop showed him her Frankies and got nary a rise out of him >>



    I've yet to meet a man i couldn't get a rise out of!


    imageBe Bop A Lula!!
    "Senorita HepKitty"
    "I want a real cool Kitty from Hepcat City, to stay in step with me" - Bill Carter
  • cladkingcladking Posts: 28,701 ✭✭✭✭✭
    He was ripped into pieces and sewn back together again. Sometimes even frankies aren't enough.image
    Tempus fugit.
  • OuthaulOuthaul Posts: 7,440 ✭✭✭✭✭
    Ahhh Sir Carl of Funk...you dosth maketh my day!
  • ccrdragonccrdragon Posts: 2,697 ✭
    We must arm ourselves against this intrusion from the Darkside!!! To ARMS!!! Oh wait!!! I collect over there also....

    (great story Clank, they just keep getting better every week!)
    Cecil
    Total Copper Nutcase - African, British Ships, Channel Islands!!!
    'Do not meddle in the affairs of dragons, for you are crunchy and taste good with ketchup'
  • ursabearursabear Posts: 1,888
    Very interesting. I always kind of had Python-esque pictures in my mind when reading Sir Clank's Coinalot missives!

  • coinguy1coinguy1 Posts: 13,484 ✭✭✭
    ursabear, I think you got it backwards - perhaps Python had Clankesque visions ....
  • MrKelsoMrKelso Posts: 2,907 ✭✭✭
    image


    "The silver is mine and the gold is mine,' declares the LORD GOD Almighty."
  • Cam40Cam40 Posts: 8,146 ✭
    sword Excoiniber hehe

    Then the scene with KingArtR and Dr.DPoole was nothing less than brilliant.

    THEN The revelations of KingArtR and the `DarkSide`

    That was fabuloso Carl. Please continue to brew this magical elxir of numismatic literary fantasy.

    image
  • 1jester1jester Posts: 8,637 ✭✭✭
    "Askari's sphere of influence is getting out of hand. It's time for a regime change." --Dog

    That hardly seems likely.image

    imageimageimage
    .....GOD
    image

    "Ask, and it shall be given you; seek, and ye shall find; knock, and it shall be opened unto you." -Luke 11:9

    "Hear, O Israel: The LORD our God is one LORD: And thou shalt love the LORD thy God with all thine heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy might." -Deut. 6:4-5

    "For the LORD is our judge, the LORD is our lawgiver, the LORD is our king; He will save us." -Isaiah 33:22
  • BearBear Posts: 18,953 ✭✭✭
    Oh and Carl, please check the fit on the cod pieces.

    When their too tight, it gives me a headache. Sir Bear

    There once was a place called
    Camelotimage
  • ClankeyeClankeye Posts: 3,928 ✭
    Fear not, Bear! For the Earl of Compucheap has invented The Slab Caddy™! A small pouch originally meant for transporting coinage, it can also be used to store those troublesome codpieces when it just feels like too big an effort to be big.

    Available now in the Coinalot gift shop!

    Clankeye

    Brevity is the soul of wit. --William Shakespeare
  • RussRuss Posts: 48,514 ✭✭✭
    Did somebody mention the coolest new numismatic accessory on the market? The Slab Caddy™! image

    Russ, NCNE
    eBay consignment sales | | Collectibles from Resco CCC
  • BearBear Posts: 18,953 ✭✭✭
    Carl, you made me laugh so hard, my wife came into

    the room to see what was going on. If I had been

    drinking my chocolate soy milk at the time, it would

    have spouteth forth in great gushes from my noseth.

    Your replys are as funny as your stories.image
    There once was a place called
    Camelotimage
  • dpooledpoole Posts: 5,940 ✭✭✭✭✭
    Just because Dr. Dpoole is to be hung next Tuesday does not mean that King ArtR will not be billed for Dr. Dpoole's customary and reasonable fee.


    Tremendously creative and hilarious as usual, Clank!

    image

    Here's a warning parable for coin collectors...



  • coinguy1coinguy1 Posts: 13,484 ✭✭✭
    David, congrats on your major role in "Good Morning Class"! You are now, quite famous.

    And, I agree - by all means, charge your fee for next week. Whether you are going to be left "hanging" for it or not, is, of course, another story, altogether. image

  • BearBear Posts: 18,953 ✭✭✭
    One more time around and then we move on.
    There once was a place called
    Camelotimage
  • marcmoishmarcmoish Posts: 6,330 ✭✭✭✭✭
    Tremendously creative and hilarious as usual, Clank!


    Ditto with DP ...agree totally, and another masterpiece.
    Carl, I read it midday - and forced myself off the thread to re-read it tonite.

    Carl, that cover Bill's got is super .



    Marc

    image
  • cosmicdebriscosmicdebris Posts: 12,332 ✭✭✭
    Had to update the cover:

    image
    Bill

    image

    09/07/2006
  • MadMonkMadMonk Posts: 3,743 ✭
    Clankeye, Impressive as usual. Thanks for adding some more brightness to my day!image
    Today's mighty oak is just yesterday's nut that held its ground.

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