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"Good Morning Class" 6 -- Halloween

ClankeyeClankeye Posts: 3,928 ✭
in U.S. Coin Forum
Mrs. Coinboard: (under her desk) Good morning class!
All: (under their desks) Good morning Mrs. Coinboard!
Mrs. CB: Is he gone?
All: Yes, Mrs. Coinboard!
Her head pops up, she looks left, then right
Mrs. CB: No Drill Sergeant Bear?
Fog is creeping in under the classroom door
All: Nuh-uh, Mrs. Coinboard!
They emerge from under their desks. Fog swirls forbodingly at their feet
Mrs. CB: (shaking her head) Brrrrrr... Angels and Devils and Drill Sergeant Bears... Oh my! Halloween, dears... it must be Halloween! Yes?... Dpoole?
Dpoole: I think we experienced an episode of mass hysteria, Mrs. Coinboard! Like the people at the Salem Witch trials, or guys bidding on state quarters....
The fog is thick and cold now
IrishMike: Yeah! There's no such thing as Devil Bears or Angel Bears or Drill Sarg---

BE-LAY THAT MATEY!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Out of the fog steps the peg-legged ghost of Captain Angus McBear. Wild eyed, with matted black beard, a parrot, cutlass-- in full pirate regalia... and a hangman's noose fitted around his neck

The Ghost of Captain McBear: (sword to the chest of IrishMike) No Devil Bear is it? I'd be withdrawin' that one laddie.... Next ye'll be telling me that ol' Wallstreetbird here on me shoulder 'taint a parrot!
Wallstreetbird: Wally wants a crackout! Braaaacccck!!
EVP: Um... your parrot looks like an ostrich.
Captain McBear: SHUT YER FOGHORN, MATEY! A better parrot 'taz never lived than Wally! (turning to Mrs. Coinboard, grimacing) 'Tis worse than I had feared. Ye have the look of the recently keel-hauled, Coin-Hag! 'Tis Hallowed Eve, woman! And there be ghosts, skeletons, Angels AND THE DEVIL HIMSELF TO PAY!
---POOF--- Devil Bear, still dressed as Elvis appears. He bows
Devil Bear: Thank ya very much!
---POOF--- he's gone
Captain McBear fondles his large belt buckle shaped like a ship's wheel
Airplanenut: Cool belt buckle, dude!
Captain McBear: AYE! It may be cool... BUT IT'S DRIVIN' ME NUTS!
Russ: Bwwwwwhahahahahahahaha!!!!!!!
Michael: yes yes yes, lol!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Captain McBear: (wiping his eyes) Ahhh... har... I loves that one.
Mrs. Coinboard: What is it that you want with us Captain McBear?!!!

(Momentarily we are transported into the brain of the class Hamster "Hamstaconda." He is in his cage watching the action while running on his treadmill. Hamstaconda: Puff-puff-puff Geez, this is great! Puff-puff-puff I've listened to this crap for months! Hamstaconda did this! Hamstaconda did that! Puff-puff-puff I hope he SLAUGHTERS 'em all! Puff-puff-puff)

Captain McBear: 'Tis written Coin-Haggy, that upon Hallowed Eve the ghost of Captain McBear must WALK THE EARTH 'til he finds thems that is vile enough, GREEDY enough, TWISTED ENOUGH! To find his buried treasure....
Mrs. CB: Oh, well... in that case, pull up a chair, dear!
Captain McBear: (sitting) Thanks be to ya, Coin-wench. You may not be easy on the eyes... but you could fart in a bass drum, and it would still be music to me!
--Silence--
Mdwoods: Why do you have a rope around your neck?
Captain McBear: BECAUSE I WAS HANGED! Ye insolent, pup!
Halfnut: By who?
Captain McBear: BY MESELF! After I reads the AgentJim/Anaconda thread.
The Numish: What happened to your leg?
Captain McBear: ME LEG???!!!!!!! Ever hear'd of hims by the name of Clank-eye?
Nucklehead: (gasping) He cut off your leg?
Captain McBear: NAY, YA FOOL! I stuck me boot so far up his arse... the ship's surgeon had to take the rest.... But, watch this! (he pulls an NGC slab from his pocket and holds it up so Wallstreetbird can see it)
Wallstreetbird: Wally wants a crackout! BRAAAAACCCK!!!!!!!!
Captain McBear brings his peg-leg up, smashes it down on the slab, removes the coin and puts it in Wally's beak.
Captain McBear: Ya sees, buckoos, the stump comes in handy sometimes. HAR!
DesertLizard: You said there was buried treasure?!
Captain McBear: (coming close, nose to nose) So I did, lad... so I did! The Ghost of Captain Angus McBear's Halloween Treasure... do ya have the stones to find it?
Lanlord: I do!
FC57Coins: Me too!
Captain McBear: (he is fading, his features slowly becoming a skull and cross bones) Then start here brave boys... Where X marks the spot... And be ye ware.. lest the owl... hoot... thrice... (like a whisper, he is gone)

X MARKS THE SPOT
Brevity is the soul of wit. --William Shakespeare

Comments

  • LanLordLanLord Posts: 11,714 ✭✭✭✭✭
    here we goimage
  • coinguy1coinguy1 Posts: 13,484 ✭✭✭
    Clankeye - awesome! How about 2, a week, from now on??????image
  • halfnuthalfnut Posts: 1,619
    I must be moving up, I got a two word part imageimageimage
    U S Navy Retired 22 years - ENC(SW) Ret. - Travling Nuclear Maintanence Contractor - Working Indian Point Nuclear plant Buchanan New York
    image

    ">Franklin Halves
    ">Kennedy Halves
  • shirohniichanshirohniichan Posts: 4,992 ✭✭✭
    This looks good! I can hardly wait for the conclusion. image
    image
    Obscurum per obscurius
  • UncleJoeUncleJoe Posts: 2,536 ✭✭✭
    Clankeye, Bravo!!! Encore, Encore!!!image

    (Now, where is the treasure, really?)image

    Joe.
  • FC57CoinsFC57Coins Posts: 9,140 ✭
    Rut roh - me thinks me hear's me stones a clanking!!! LOL - Excellent Carl! take a bow!

    Frank
  • dimeadzndimeadzn Posts: 123 ✭✭
    I love these threads! Thanks! image
    Hamsters oy! Why collect they the taco.
  • GilbertGilbert Posts: 1,533 ✭✭✭
    Clankeye,

    I must admit, after the first installment, I didn't know what to think: Tall tales on the coinboard? But, I have copied them all, and look forward to each subsequent installment.

    This one, however, left me feeling, well .... cheated. Like you used too much cut on my fix, if ya' know what I mean.image
    Gilbert
  • smprfismprfi Posts: 874 ✭
    You ever think about writing short stories?You sure do have a knack for it.These are good.
    My Ebay Auctions
  • BearBear Posts: 18,953 ✭✭✭
    I dont know I have been getting a rough time in these here stories.

    First I get shot and die, then a evil twin shows up that I never

    knew existed. Then I become an angel and finally, someone cuts my

    leg off and I become a pirate.I dont really know what kind of bird

    Old Clank put on my shoulder, but its making a real mess up there.

    In addition Im still afraid that a big snake is going to eat me

    and I could not sleep all last night and hid under the bed. Then Mrs Bear said that snakes

    like to sleep under beds and I got a panic attack and had to take my pills.

    And the rest of you think that you got problems? Hmmmphhh!!!! Marshall Bear
    There once was a place called
    Camelotimage
  • BearBear Posts: 18,953 ✭✭✭
    Hey Clank, every time I come back as somebody else

    do I at least get to wear clean underwear?
    There once was a place called
    Camelotimage
  • halfnuthalfnut Posts: 1,619
    Only an smart and wise bear would think of asking about clean underware.image
    U S Navy Retired 22 years - ENC(SW) Ret. - Travling Nuclear Maintanence Contractor - Working Indian Point Nuclear plant Buchanan New York
    image

    ">Franklin Halves
    ">Kennedy Halves
  • coinguy1coinguy1 Posts: 13,484 ✭✭✭
    Bear, You sound like a character from the old TV show Dallas! Remember, anacondas can't eat you, they can only strangle you.
  • ClankeyeClankeye Posts: 3,928 ✭
    Aye, clean McBear. And filled with gold doubloons...

    There was an old pirate from France
    Who kept a a rare coin down his pants
    He stored the gold coin
    Right next to his groin
    Where ladies would find it by chance



    I sees that Keets has been to me treasure and tried to dig it up. I like the cut of his jib!
    Brevity is the soul of wit. --William Shakespeare
  • BearBear Posts: 18,953 ✭✭✭
    Thanks Coinguy, thats a relief. I dont mind much being strangled

    I just cant stand the though of being swallowed. Bear
    There once was a place called
    Camelotimage
  • coinguy1coinguy1 Posts: 13,484 ✭✭✭
    Bear, on second thought, I might have misspoken. We've never met and, in the event that you're a little bear (as opposed to a mid-sized or large-sized bear), it is still possible that an anaconda could ......um, not necessarily have to strangle you in order to enjoy a (bear) meal.image
  • shirohniichanshirohniichan Posts: 4,992 ✭✭✭
    In addition Im still afraid that a big snake is going to eat me

    Rest assured that I don't eat bears. I can't speak for anaconda, though. image
    image
    Obscurum per obscurius
  • BearBear Posts: 18,953 ✭✭✭
    Where did I put the Damn Prozac. I can never find them when I need one.

    Do you people have any idea how dark it must be inside a big snake. Also I get

    claustrophobic in tight, cramped, small spaces.Now is the time I wish I was

    an elephant and a big one at that instead of a small cute bear.
    There once was a place called
    Camelotimage
  • mbbikermbbiker Posts: 2,873 ✭
    These storys are a great way to bring in the new week. Its nice to know when i wake up mon. morning i'll have somthing funny to start out the day.image
    Gold + Silver for sale on BST, Eagles, Pandas, ATB's...
  • keetskeets Posts: 25,351 ✭✭✭✭✭
    There once was a man from Seattle
    Who's threads would describe every battle.
    We laughed when we read
    What his characters said
    Of the members who acted like cattle!!

    al h.image

    who's biddin' on my treasure map?? image
  • BearBear Posts: 18,953 ✭✭✭
    Keets - Your poem wins the Bears coveted "GROWL OF APPROVAL AWARD".

    Congratulations. Bear
    There once was a place called
    Camelotimage
  • RLinnRLinn Posts: 596 ✭
    Good morning, Clankeye, go to the head of the class. As usual you have set the curve for creative writing. Another classic. Thanks.image
    Buy the coin...but be sure to pay for it.
  • MadMartyMadMarty Posts: 16,697 ✭✭✭
    Just too friggin' funny, I love it. Keep them coming. Hey bear, your a star!!!imageimage
    It is not exactly cheating, I prefer to consider it creative problem solving!!!

  • BearBear Posts: 18,953 ✭✭✭
    Madmarty - Do you think this could lead

    to a TV series or even a movie? Bear, the star of stage, film and TV productions.
    There once was a place called
    Camelotimage
  • coinguy1coinguy1 Posts: 13,484 ✭✭✭
    Keets/Al - good one!
  • tonerstoners Posts: 403
    Rolling, Rolling, Rolling, Keep them doggies rolling, keep em coming Clankeye.
    Allen
    Love those TONED Coins, a true Addict!!!

    Proud member of TCCS!
  • numobrinumobri Posts: 1,473 ✭✭✭
    I must say,your stories are AWESOME.I've seen it all,while lurking outside the window of the classroom.
    NUMO
  • keetskeets Posts: 25,351 ✭✭✭✭✭
    hey brian

    you really should get in your seat!!! i don't think you can afford too many more tardies on your report card. coinbroad might send you home with a note!!! image

    al h.image
  • airplanenutairplanenut Posts: 22,148 ✭✭✭✭✭
    Clank- you have a gift image
    JK Coin Photography - eBay Consignments | High Quality Photos | LOW Prices | 20% of Consignment Proceeds Go to Pancreatic Cancer Research
  • MadMartyMadMarty Posts: 16,697 ✭✭✭


    << <i>to a TV series or even a movie? Bear, the star of stage, film and TV productions. >>



    Sure, there were lot's of bears on TV and movies.

    Smoky the bear
    BJ and the bear (or was it the bear likes a BJ)image
    Grizzly Adams
    The hair bear bunch

    I'm sure there are plenty more, just can't think of any...
    It is not exactly cheating, I prefer to consider it creative problem solving!!!

  • dpooledpoole Posts: 5,940 ✭✭✭✭✭
    How embarrassing. I coulda SWORN Bear was the product of mass hysteria.

    Anyhow, Bear, sounds like your worry now is getting trampled by a hamstaconda!

    Here's a warning parable for coin collectors...



  • coinguy1coinguy1 Posts: 13,484 ✭✭✭
    I wonder if a "hamstaconda" is any relation to a "MastaHanky" ? Bear? Clankeye? MastaHanky? Can any of you shed any light on that?
  • BearBear Posts: 18,953 ✭✭✭
    I could become a bigger star then Gentle Ben.

    Then who knows, I might run for President, king or even emperor. Oh, I forgot,

    Shiro has a lock on the emperor thing. Vote for Bear!!!!
    There once was a place called
    Camelotimage
  • krankykranky Posts: 8,709 ✭✭✭
    Wally wants a crackout!

    LOL! image

    New collectors, please educate yourself before spending money on coins; there are people who believe that using numismatic knowledge to rip the naïve is what this hobby is all about.

  • RegistryCoinRegistryCoin Posts: 5,117 ✭✭✭✭
    lol, al h. image
  • MrLeeMrLee Posts: 1,847 ✭✭✭
    Not the dreaded Hamstaconda! Anything but THAT! Shiver me timbers and run for the Yard arms matey's! (Or at least the poop deck)

    Classic Clankeye. Just Classic. Thank you for sharing your gift. image
  • goyankeezgoyankeez Posts: 357
    LOL image

    What's next:

    Bear action figures. Available: "Marshal Bear", "Devil Bear", "Angel Bear", and special limited edition "Captain McBear".

    Bear's own series. A spin-off a la Norman Lear.

    Luchboxes, breakfast cereals, comic books, video games, etc.

    ... the marketing potential is limitless. image
    "Buy the coin, not the holder"

    Proof Dime Registry Set
  • leothelyonleothelyon Posts: 8,459 ✭✭✭✭✭
    HA! Anaconda couldn't eat Bear, not without cheese and wine. Bear is a class act!

    Leo

    The more qualities observed in a coin, the more desirable that coin becomes!

    My Jefferson Nickel Collection

  • abmluceabmluce Posts: 592
    ttt
    give me liberty or give me death
    my hotelsimage
  • BearBear Posts: 18,953 ✭✭✭
    There once was a place called
    Camelotimage
  • KlectorKidKlectorKid Posts: 3,723
    great comic/story/topic, some day ill be in 1... image
    image
  • ClankeyeClankeye Posts: 3,928 ✭


    << <i>KlectorKid: (sobbing) I don't wanna be in a bodybag! >>



    Good Morning Class 4

    Mrs: Coinboard: Earth to KlectorChild! Pay attention, dear.
    Brevity is the soul of wit. --William Shakespeare
  • RegistryCoinRegistryCoin Posts: 5,117 ✭✭✭✭
    image It was a Monday morning class...

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