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Upcoming changes to U.S. currency



Secretary of the Treasury Jack Lew recently announced a series of significant changes to U.S. currency. Here are some of the more notable alterations on the horizon:



$50 bill to feature blinking Ulysses S. Grant



Portentous images of the attacks on the World Trade Center hidden on the $20 bill to be hidden more carefully this time



Word “Dollars” officially changed to “Smackeroos” on all bills



New flavors include Radical Ranch, Sweet Heat, and Baja Burst



Approval to produce a $2.07 bill in keeping with inflation of bodega pizza slice



$5 bills way easier to counterfeit



One more attempt to shove a dollar coin down our throats



Current level of U.S. national debt revealed when bills held under ultraviolet light

Comments

  • TookybanditTookybandit Posts: 3,412 ✭✭✭✭
    Haha, I love The Onion! Thanks for sharing. I'm going to forward this article to a friend who will appreciate it.
  • gsalexgsalex Posts: 218 ✭✭✭
    - Portrait on $2 to be auctioned off to highest bidder
    - New watermarks to feature Marvel comic heroes
    - Note sizes reduced 20% annually until they match credit cards
    Intrigued by all things intaglio.
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