CPAmike's 5,000th-post ROAST
EchoCanyon
Posts: 2,288 ✭✭✭
Yep, our friend, hit the magic 5k. Who's got something funny, sarcastic, inappropriate to say?
0
EchoCanyon
Posts: 2,288 ✭✭✭
Yep, our friend, hit the magic 5k. Who's got something funny, sarcastic, inappropriate to say?
Comments
Mark
T206 Set - 300/524
<< <i>I'm having cpamike do my taxes next year, and I'm gonna place his check inside a sealed wax envelope. >>
lol
<< <i>Rumor has it he likes to molest his wax packs. Kinda like Buffalo Bob with skin, Mike will do with his packs. Not that there is anything wrong with that.
Mark >>
I think either Mike and/or Tim have a leisure suit made out of 1975 baseball wrappers
Current obsession, all things Topps 1969 - 1972
<< <i>
<< <i>Rumor has it he likes to molest his wax packs. Kinda like Buffalo Bob with skin, Mike will do with his packs. Not that there is anything wrong with that.
Mark >>
I think either Mike and/or Tim have a leisure suit made out of 1975 baseball wrappers >>
Not mike. He'd need to actually rip something open to get those wrappers.
Mike doesn't like a woman in crotchless panties, because he likes his treasures to be tightly sealed, with no visible holes in the wrapping.
Collecting 1970s Topps baseball wax, rack and cello packs, as well as PCGS graded Half Cents, Large Cents, Two Cent pieces and Three Cent Silver pieces.
Doug
Liquidating my collection for the 3rd and final time. Time for others to enjoy what I have enjoyed over the last several decades. Money could be put to better use.
<< <i>I'm having cpamike do my taxes next year, and I'm gonna place his check inside a sealed wax envelope. >>
^^^ That is awesome!
Mike's a good guy - proud to call him a friend here.
<< <i>I'm having cpamike do my taxes next year, and I'm gonna place his check inside a sealed wax envelope. >>
Doug, them are great too!! Large fries!! LOL
Watch your back on that post count Mike, Im right behind you.
Maybe 30 miles or so, but right behind you anyhow
Jmaciu's Collection
Jeff
Card Country
Graded stars 1950's-1980
Jeff
Card Country
Graded stars 1950's-1980
Every Purdue grad I know has always been super nice... greeting me with a smile
...as I go through the door at Walmart.
RIP Mom- 1932-2012
Pack
Attack
Current obsession, all things Topps 1969 - 1972
<< <i>On one of Mike's first couple of dates with his future-wife, she said, "is that an unopened cello in your pocket or are you just happy to see me." He knew she was a keeper. >>
Honest to god story, that's how I got engaged. I had the ring box in my pocket, she felt the bulge and grabbed it. Couldn't back out then!
you'll never be able to outrun a bad diet
<< <i>When Mike was at Purdue he worked in the library. He loved it because all the books were unopened!
Jeff >>
This one made me LOL!!
A: When he realises he does not have the charisma to succeed as an undertaker.
1994 Pro Line Live
TheDallasCowboyBackfieldProject
"Honey, could you tell me about your work?"
See you next week, buddy.
Lol. Congrats on the 5k Mike. Good having you around.
Me: "Nice rack!"
Mike: "Topps?"
Me: "No!" "Boobs"
Nick
Reap the whirlwind.
Need to buy something for the wife or girlfriend? Check out Vintage Designer Clothing.
--I never dreamed I had instead unleashed a monster poster
I never realized how offensive Purdue was. And none of my fellow Boilermakers came to our defense. Some quick facts...
1) What school had its own nude olympics?
2) What school drove Bobby Knight nuts that he felt the urge to throw chairs like a BIG baby?
3) What school has buildings named after Astronauts?
4) What school has the best popcorn around?
5) What school produced the greatest basketball coach of all time?
6) What school has its own airport?
7) What school had a sitting president visit?
8) What school has a mascot that can kick the *ss out of any other school's mascot with a fricken hammer?
9) What school has a largest matching band drum in the world?
And drumroll please...
10) What school had CPAMike roam the campus?
You guessed it, Purdue!!!
Some other observations I've made thus far...
1) I will not be doing Jeff's taxes anytime soon.
2) Dan is correct that I don't have a leisure suit made out of 1975 baseball wrappers. Tim on the other hand...
3) Mike will not be ripping any 1975 baseball racks under any circumstances.
4) Doug is right, we need to go to Miller's Ale House.
5) Brian will never catch up to me in posts, even after I'm dead.
6) CPA in CPAMike stands for Certified Pack Authority.
7) I never worked in the library, but I did have a radio show at Purdue. And I did have to open the records to play them. And yes, I am that old that we had turntables and records.
8) I've never worked at Walmarts.
9) I actually had a rack pack in my pants when I met my wife.
10) Stephen has come up with the perfect Christmas. I will implement that idea next year. More money to spend on unopened.
11) Matt will be disappointed with my next 5,000 posts.
12) CPA's lead exciting lives, we just don't like to gloat about it.
13) I actually love Hooters, both the restaurant and you know, Hooters.
14) I actually still have unopened 1990 Donruss that I purchased when they were released.
15) Don is to blame for my first 5,000 posts.
Seriously, I hope my next 5,000 are as fun and the first 5,000. I've met a lot of great guys on here and I really appreciate all the kind words. Thank you.
But I have promises to keep,
And miles to go before I sleep,
And miles to go before I sleep."
"Life is what happens to you while you're busy making other plans."
Collecting:
Any unopened Baseball cello and rack packs and boxes from the 1970's and early 1980s.
9) I actually had a rack pack in my pants when I met my wife.
WTB: PSA 1 - PSA 3 Centered, High Eye Appeal 1950's Mantle
Great stuff guys!
<< <i>more on this please!
9) I actually had a rack pack in my pants when I met my wife. >>
But I have promises to keep,
And miles to go before I sleep,
And miles to go before I sleep."
"Life is what happens to you while you're busy making other plans."
Collecting:
Any unopened Baseball cello and rack packs and boxes from the 1970's and early 1980s.
WTB: PSA 1 - PSA 3 Centered, High Eye Appeal 1950's Mantle
<< <i>There is some seriously funny sh*t in this thread. Thanks for the countdown and roast Gregg. >>
All in good fun, my friend. :-)
Some of Mike's favorite cards or dirty-talk with Pam?
<< <i>CPA's lead exciting lives, we just don't like to gloat about it. >>
This is true.
Mike was in a Chuck Norris movie.
Mike's got a Black Belt in Economics.
------------------
One day Mike walks into a bar and sees a jar full of 20 dollar bills on the table. He asks the bartender what the jar is for.
"We're having a contest" the bartender replies. "You put a 20 dollar bill in the jar and then have to complete 3 challenges. If you can complete them succesfully, you get the whole jar full of money."
"What are the challenges?" Mike asks.
"Well, first you have to down eight shots of tequila in 20 seconds. Second, out back behind the bar there is an old, mean pitbull with a bad tooth. You have to pull that tooth. Finally, upstairs there is a 90 year old woman who has never achieved the big O; you have to fix that."
"Wow, that sounds a bit extreme for my taste, I think I'll just have a beer" Mike says. The bartender chuckles understandingly and hands him a beer.
Over the next hour, Mike has a few drinks and keeps eyeing the jar; the jar was stuffed with twenties, there had to be over a thousand bucks in it. Finally, he shrugs, pulls out a twenty, and puts it in the jar. At this, the entire bar cheers.
The bartender announces "Challenge one!" and pours Mike eight shots. Without a moment's hesitation, he pounds all of them back, with time to spare. The bar cheers again as Mike announces, heavily inebriated and slurring his words, "Alright, I've done the shots, now for challenge two!" and stumbled out the back door, shutting it behind him.
The bar patrons can hear what happens next. Barking, yipping, Mike yelping in pain, the tearing of clothes; there is a true battle raging outside. Finally, it gets quiet and he comes back in. His shirt is torn to shreds, he's bleeding from a dozen cuts and bites, but he stands triumphant with a huge, drunken smile on his face.
"Took care of the dog! Now, where's the old lady with the bad tooth?"
Dodgers collection scans | Brett Butler registry | 1978 Dodgers - straight 9s, homie
Snuffy, the montage is growing most impressive! It's like finding the man and the dog in those old NY Post cartoons! LOL!!
Collecting 1970s Topps baseball wax, rack and cello packs, as well as PCGS graded Half Cents, Large Cents, Two Cent pieces and Three Cent Silver pieces.
She says: "For 300 bucks, I'll give ya anything ya want as long as you keep it to 3 words or less"
Mike puts his drink down, thinks for a bit...slams 300 bucks onto the bar top and...
says: "Fifty-Two Wax Pack!"
<< <i>That second one is hilarious, Geordie!!
Snuffy, the montage is growing most impressive! It's like finding the man and the dog in those old NY Post cartoons! LOL!! >>
+1
<< <i>Tim, I thought you were going to rip a 70s pack in Mikes honor. >>
He said he would but that I had to go first. I wouldn't wait around for that.
But I have promises to keep,
And miles to go before I sleep,
And miles to go before I sleep."
"Life is what happens to you while you're busy making other plans."
Collecting:
Any unopened Baseball cello and rack packs and boxes from the 1970's and early 1980s.
<< <i>
This is great Snuffy. You even got stormtrooper in there. I'm just surprised you aren't in the picture too.
But I have promises to keep,
And miles to go before I sleep,
And miles to go before I sleep."
"Life is what happens to you while you're busy making other plans."
Collecting:
Any unopened Baseball cello and rack packs and boxes from the 1970's and early 1980s.
<< <i>Mike's sitting at the bar - drink in hand - when a hooker approaches him.
She says: "For 300 bucks, I'll give ya anything ya want as long as you keep it to 3 words or less"
Mike puts his drink down, thinks for a bit...slams 300 bucks onto the bar top and...
says: "Fifty-Two Wax Pack!"
I like this one Mike. Thanks for the chuckle.
But I have promises to keep,
And miles to go before I sleep,
And miles to go before I sleep."
"Life is what happens to you while you're busy making other plans."
Collecting:
Any unopened Baseball cello and rack packs and boxes from the 1970's and early 1980s.
But I have promises to keep,
And miles to go before I sleep,
And miles to go before I sleep."
"Life is what happens to you while you're busy making other plans."
Collecting:
Any unopened Baseball cello and rack packs and boxes from the 1970's and early 1980s.
<< <i>Geordie, didn't you tell that joke before but the guy's name was Dan?
You're right, except I had cast Dan as the homeless guy in the alley with the bad tooth.
Dodgers collection scans | Brett Butler registry | 1978 Dodgers - straight 9s, homie