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Dear Tech Support,

Last year I upgraded from Girlfriend 7.0 to Wife 1.0. I soon noticed that the new program began unexpected child processing that took up a lot of space and valuable resources. In addition, Wife 1.0 installed itself into all other programs and now monitors all other system activity. Applications such as Poker Night 10.3, Football 5.0, Hunting and Fishing 7.5, and Racing 3.6 no longer run, crashing the system whenever selected.

I can't seem to keep Wife 1.0 in the background while attempting to run my favorite applications. I'm thinking about going back to Girlfriend 7.0, but the un-install doesn't work on Wife 1.0. Please help!

Thanks,

A Troubled User. (KEEP READING)

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REPLY:

Dear Troubled User:

This is a very common problem that men complain about.

Many people upgrade from Girlfriend 7.0 to Wife 1.0, thinking that it is just a Utilities and Entertainment program. Wife 1.0 is an OPERATING SYSTEM and is designed by its Creator to run EVERYTHING!!! It is also impossible to delete Wife 1.0 and to return to Girlfriend 7.0. It is impossible to un-install, or purge the program files from the system once installed.

You cannot go back to Girlfriend 7.0 because Wife 1.0 is designed to not allow this. Look in your Wife 1.0 manual under Warnings-Alimony-Child Support. I recommend that you keep Wife 1.0 and work on improving the situation. I suggest installing the background application "Yes Dear" to alleviate software augmentation.

The best course of action is to enter the command C:APOLOGIZE because ultimately you will have to give the APOLOGIZE command before the system will return to normal anyway.

Wife 1.0 is a great program, but it tends to be very high maintenance. Wife 1.0 comes with several support programs, such as Clean and Sweep 3.0, Cook It 1.5 and Do Bills 4.2.

However, be very careful how you use these programs. Improper use will cause the system to launch the program Nag Nag 9.5. Once this happens, the only way to improve the performance of Wife 1.0 is to purchase additional software. I recommend Flowers 2.1 and Diamonds 5.0 !

WARNING!!! DO NOT, under any circumstances, install Secretary With Short Skirt 3.3. This application is not supported by Wife 1.0 and will cause irreversible damage to the operating system.

Best of luck,

Tech Support

Comments

  • I wish I had read that sooner, I am getting married next monthimage


    Matt
    Matt - UK based collector
  • milbrocomilbroco Posts: 2,732 ✭✭✭
    Excellent! Now I understand my problem more.
    ebay seller name milbroco
    email bcmiller7@comcast.net
  • The best way to deal with that problem is with a patch called Domestic Violence 5.0. I started using it a few months ago and it fixed my system right up. Just kidding!
  • Stone193Stone193 Posts: 24,407 ✭✭✭✭✭
    Chad
    That was pretty cool!
    When I switched from 7.0 friend to 1.0 Wife - my whole perspective on life changed and I then felt like I was going up against an entirely New System!

    image

    image

    your friend
    Mike
    Mike
  • In the end, there's always reliable right hand 5.0.
    “Think of how stupid the average person is, and realize half of them are stupider than that.” - George Carlin
  • Stone193Stone193 Posts: 24,407 ✭✭✭✭✭


    << <i>In the end, there's always reliable right hand 5.0. >>


    image
    Mike
  • In the end, there's always reliable right hand 5.0

    a.k.a. Mary Palm and her four daughters for dummies!

  • pandrewspandrews Posts: 7,598 ✭✭✭
    upgrade to wife 2.0..

    or just "beta-test" girlfriend 7.1
    ·p_A·
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