In a light, airy castle in the sky there lived an Ajaan

laurentyvan

In a light, airy castle in the sky there lived an Ajaan. Not a thing of twigs and silks this castle, but of cleanly hewn rock, brick and mortar. It was filled with all manner of writing desks and comfortable chairs and cubby holes and secret places where his treasures could be put and retrieved as needed.

This Ajaan was well-to do, and his name was Bingo Goldbutton, as he had sewn gold coins to his vest instead of buttons. The Goldbuttons had lived in their castle for many generations, and everyone in the surrounding countryside respected them, and called the Goldbuttons genteel and mannerly and generous, as several times a year Ajaan Goldbutton would pass out precious coins, extra’s from his burgeoning coin business. This is a story of how he sidestepped an adventure and took revenge on his only enemy.

One early morning Bingo heard a knock on his door. He opened it slowly, as it was massive and of intricately carved oak, the door swinging open on silent, well-oiled hinges. An old man stood at his door, unwashed, unkempt, and smelling of sausages and fish. Ajaan had never seen someone so thin, and touched by pity invited the beggar inside.

“Old man,” he asked, what is your name?”
“My name is Aethelred” the old man answered, throwing off his old coat and revealing well-worn armor and sword.
“Aethelred,” Bingo exclaimed, “my sworn enemy.”
“Aye, and today ‘tis your doom! No more will I allow you to steal business from me. Your slabbed coins are more respected than mine, and you undercut me on gold! You gave away hammered coins and charge less for shipping. Prepare to meet your maker.”

With that, Aethelred pulled his sword and made as if to strike.

“Stay your hand, OLD DEAD KING,” Ajaan intoned, his powerful voice echoing through the castle halls. “I KNOW YOU FOR WHAT YOU ARE!”
Ajaan gestured with his hands, fingers forming intricate designs in mid-air. A glowing orb of light appeared in front of the old dead king who threw himself backwards in horror.
“No, not that, please!” he exclaimed but Ajaan was already speaking his words of power.

“Ike, Ike, take this enemy of mine,
and place your spell upon his eyes
so that all coins he sees are thine.”

With a sudden swooshing sound the ball of light darted around the room three times and then struck Aethelred full in the face. The dead king staggered and recoiled, and then glanced at a nearby desk where lay some coins. He moaned in despair, and turning, staggered out the door as fast as his skeletal legs would allow.
Ajaan smiled at the effect of his spell, which allowed the cursed to see only Eisenhower dollars, regardless of what coins he was actually looking at.
“Lucky I wasn’t really mad,” Ajaan muttered, “I could have used my Churchill spell and really ruined his days.”

And with that matter handled, Ajaan turned to a warm, delicious, and well-deserved breakfast.

cosmicdebris

Serves the dead king right. What a woeful life his will be from now on.

ajaan

BRAVO! BRAVO!

Aethelred

Even a humorless Old Dead King can appreciate a story like that one! I guess Ajaan deserved to best me at least once, now I'm off to look at my Ike collection.

ajaan

While you're at it, check out your Beany Babies too.

Aethelred

<< <i>While you're at it, check out your Beany Babies too. >>



They all look like Ike, and my PEZ, not my PEZ!!!!!!

farthing

Just wait until he looks at his wife!

Aethelred

<< <i>Just wait until he looks at his wife! >>



Do you point the gun behind your ear or at the side of your head?

ajaan

Just point it into your ear. That way in will go in one side and out the other without doing any damage.













You set yourself up for that one.

Aethelred

<< <i>Just point it into your ear. That way in will go in one side and out the other without doing any damage.


You set yourself up for that one. >>




I can see it is not going to be my night!