Coin Jokes
JohnZ
Posts: 1,732 ✭
Does anyone know any good coin jokes I can steal? (I hope this isn't OT.)
We ARE watching you.
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Comments
...a quarter horse.
Best wishes,
David
P.S. I didnt pen the joke and have no clue who did.
A guy comes home from work, hits the couch and turns on the T.V. He yells to his wife to bring him a beer before it starts.
His wife comes from the kitchen and brings him a beer.
No sooner does she reach the kitchen and he says " can you bring me another beer before it starts"?
His wife brings him another beer.
He guzzles the beer down and before she can even reach the kitchen asks " can you bring me another beer before it starts"?
She goes into the kitchen, gets a beer, walks up to him and slams the beer down on the coffee table. She says " I cook, I clean, I do the dishes, wash your clothes, Im not going to be your waitress"!
He just shakes his head and says " its started already"!
That's pretty coiny.
Here's a warning parable for coin collectors...
He married it.
So the hooker comes back to the pimp and hands him $5.10, the pimp asks what guy gave you a dime?
The hooker say's they all did.
Squawbuck! hahahahhahahahaha
An experienced hunter is asked to take his clutzy, not-so-smart younger brother out on a hunting excursion. As they are both crouching down quietly in the woods waiting for deer, the younger brother whispers, "Hey I gotta go to the bathroom."
The experienced hunter replies back in a whisper, "There are no bathrooms near here. Go behind a tree and take your leak as quietly as possible."
The brother whispers back, "But I gotta take a dump."
"A dump? Geesh. Then go back that way, dig a hole and bury it when you're done. Do it quietly or else you'll scare the animals away."
"But what to I wipe with?"
"I don't know. Use a leaf or something. Just go."
"But what if there are poisonous plants out there?"
"Use something else then. Find something. Try a dollar."
At that, the younger brother goes away and does his business. A few minutes later, the younger brother comes back with his fingers completely covered in his own waste.
The older brother asks, "What happened?"
"Well, you suggested I use a dollar to wipe, so I used two quarters, three dimes, and four nickles."
Beer nuts are around $1.75
and Deer nuts are always under a buck.
Two coin collectors fighting over a DCAM proof Cent.
"There is a very fine line between "hobby" and "mental
illness."
Remember. ... First pillage, Then burn
hope that wasnt taken as anti-semetic by some here.
<< <i>ruh roh.
hope that wasnt taken as anti-semetic by some here.
Not anti-semetic, but clearly uncalled for and insulting.
A little restraint and self dicipline seems called for.
Camelot
Sacajaweja dollar
SBA dollar
There are a few more
Look at the reverse of Memorial cent - see Lincoln sitting there ?
Now look at the reverse of the CT quarter - do you see the hitchhiker standing by the tree?
NO?
looks like she got a ride
edited to correct dumb spelling error
Thats a cute kiddie coin joke.
Disclaimer: I'm not a dealer, trader, grader, investor or professional numismatist. I'm just a hobbyist. (To protect me but mostly you! 🤣 )
"When they can't find anything wrong with you, they create it!"
"When they can't find anything wrong with you, they create it!"
My all time favorite :
Teacher: Johnny, if you had a quarter in one pocket, and a nickel in the other pocket, what would you have ?
Johnny: Well that's easy teach'. I'd have somebody else's pants on .
Since 1965, no one has been able to find a naked dime or quarter. You know why that is? They're all clad.
Custom album maker and numismatic photographer.
Need a personalized album made? Design it on the website below and I'll build it for you.
https://www.donahuenumismatics.com/.
Key date.
Disclaimer: I'm not a dealer, trader, grader, investor or professional numismatist. I'm just a hobbyist. (To protect me but mostly you! 🤣 )
You can tell someone has good taste in music when they don't return their bottles and cans. They don't want that nickelback.
Custom album maker and numismatic photographer.
Need a personalized album made? Design it on the website below and I'll build it for you.
https://www.donahuenumismatics.com/.
Why did the coin roll hunter pursue only nickels? He had a five cent interest rate.
Custom album maker and numismatic photographer.
Need a personalized album made? Design it on the website below and I'll build it for you.
https://www.donahuenumismatics.com/.
Those are really clever @The_Dinosaur_Man!!
Disclaimer: I'm not a dealer, trader, grader, investor or professional numismatist. I'm just a hobbyist. (To protect me but mostly you! 🤣 )
Why don't vampires smile in coin shops? They can't be seen with DMPLs.
Custom album maker and numismatic photographer.
Need a personalized album made? Design it on the website below and I'll build it for you.
https://www.donahuenumismatics.com/.
Where did the wife send her numismatist husband after a heated argument? Back to his quarters.
Custom album maker and numismatic photographer.
Need a personalized album made? Design it on the website below and I'll build it for you.
https://www.donahuenumismatics.com/.
Coin jokes that were not funny from 20 years ago, are still not funny.
How does the grim reaper like numismatists? Slabbed.
Custom album maker and numismatic photographer.
Need a personalized album made? Design it on the website below and I'll build it for you.
https://www.donahuenumismatics.com/.
What ever makes cents, fwiw
This must be the best question ever asked here on these here boards...Over 20 years and less than 15 responses!
Nobody has the answer... not even...and dare I say..., ..., @MFeld might have something to say....
Disclaimer: I'm not a dealer, trader, grader, investor or professional numismatist. I'm just a hobbyist. (To protect me but mostly you! 🤣 )
The Delaware quarter is a funny coin. Maybe you can work this schtick into something.
I did not know that Paul Revere was from Delaware.
He named his thoroughbred Caesar Rodney; sire of generations of winning mounts.
Caesar and Rodney are the two oddest words to appear together on a coin.
My Dad went by the name of Johnne so of course little Johnny jokes were a specialty of his. This one was my favorite and I've told it hundreds of times. Thanks Joe!
Why did the collector pay half $1 million for the Chain Ameri?
He didn’t have any ‘cents’.
Sometimes, it’s better to be LUCKY than good. 🍀 🍺👍
My Full Walker Registry Set (1916-1947):
https://www.ngccoin.com/registry/competitive-sets/16292/
A long time ago, someone had a website on the theme "why coins are better than lizards". That website is long gone, but my favourite from the list was:
Coins are better than lizards because you can put two coins in a box overnight and have a reasonable expectation of how many coins will still be in the box the next morning. While they won't reproduce, neither will they devour each other.
Roman emperor Marcus Aurelius, "Meditations"
Apparently I have been awarded one DPOTD.
That one took me like 3 days to get. 😂
Disclaimer: I'm not a dealer, trader, grader, investor or professional numismatist. I'm just a hobbyist. (To protect me but mostly you! 🤣 )
Did you know that for Super Bowl 54 they designed a special coin (medal) for the official coin toss? It had Teddy Roosevelt on one side, and Nathan Hale on the other side. Do you know why?
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So the player had to call “Ted’s or Hale’s”! 😂
Scroll down to see the medal.
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Steve
My collecting “Pride & Joy” is my PCGS Registry Dansco 7070 Set:
https://www.pcgs.com/setregistry/type-sets/design-type-sets/complete-dansco-7070-modified-type-set-1796-date/publishedset/213996
What did one penny say to the other penny?
We make "cents" together!
Why did the coin go to school?
Because it wanted to get "cents" of education!
Why did the penny go to school?
Because it wanted to get smarter and become a "cents"ible coin!
I personally don't know any coin jokes, but I did see a counterfeit "CC" dollar, and thought to myself; "What a joke!"
What is it called when the British compare their old coins? A farthing contest.
I couldn't decide what gender I should be today, so I flipped a coin...
Wait a minute, how many sides does a coin have?
What do you call a coin good at football. A quarter back.
Why don't coins complain about the climate? Because they are used to change.
What is a coin's favorite music? Heavy metal.
My US Mint Commemorative Medal Set