"Good Morning Class" rip-off, part ll - lasagna, shrinks and flames with David Hall
coinguy1
Posts: 13,484 ✭✭✭
Link to part l - read this first
Edited to add: DISCLAIMER: This is a work of fiction. Names and characters (including dogs, bears and other animals) are part of this author's imagination and/or are used facetiously. Any resemblances to actual persons or animals is (possibly) coincidental.
Acknowledgments : This would not have been possible without the help of you, the forum members, both those mentioned in these stories as well as many, not named or included. A special thank you to Sir Clankeye, who has inspired me with his great sense of humor, gentle ways and exceptional writing. Any good that is found in my stories comes form you, the forum members - thank you.
Now, on to the story:
When we last left off with part l:
"The invitees begin to arrive in tight armor suits, provided, of course by Sir Clankeye and Accugrade.
Greg M. arrives, hand in hand with The LEGENDary Laura, otherwise known as "Little Miss Know-it-all", Tradedollarnut, a bear, some dogs, some mongrels, weasels, self anointed expert graders and lots of body bags.The gong sounds and Homerunhall, alias, the Wizard, gingerly and on tiptoes, approaches the door
PART 2
The door slowly creaks open and the invitees are astonished to see a frailer looking, much thinner Homrunhall before them. He is carrying a Bower-less & Merena-less catalog, some note paper, a miniature tape recorder and a bunch of pins.
Homerunhall - "Greetings all, please come in you asses, sorry, I meant, watch your asses, the house is freshly painted."
One by one, the forum members make their way through the door. Among others, not mentioned previously, are Bulldog, looking much like his icon and repeatedly mumbling "to the top"; dog97, a near twin to Bulldog; Lucybop, dressed as goldilocks, though arm in arm with only Marshall Bear and not the three bears; a bunch of funny looking guys in cowboy outfits, with the word "posse" on their shirt pockets; King Art-r Clankeye in his finest royal regalia (behind him, a mass of would-be writers looking for him to sign autographs); Cameron with a girlfriend on arm (not sure if it's the one he mentioned months ago or if this is a new "flame"); a bunch of guys dressed as doctors, carrying bottles and containers of unknown substances; and, as mentioned previously, Greg M, hand in hand with The LEGENDary Laura, otherwise known as "Little Miss Know-it-all", Tradedollarnut, a bear, some dogs, some mongrels, weasels, self anointed expert graders and lots of body bags. There are many others, who might be mentioned if there is a part lll.
Mike Storeim tries to enter along with the others but is quickly asked to leave. Homerunhall - "Mike, the invitation specifically said "no expert graders allowed". Coinguy1, who was behind Storeim starts to turn around to leave but has a change of heart and walks through the door muttering "I used to grade at NGC - surely I'm allowed in - I'm no expert grader". Homerunhall smirks and says "welcome, ass, I mean watch your ass, the house is freshly painted."
The house is as strange as one might expect, considering, well, you know. There is a massive round living room but beyond that, just a single, long hallway with 10 doors on each side. They are not freshly painted, by the way!
Homerunhall to his guests "you folks are going to be so happy with me and PCGS. I have listened to all of your questions, concerns and complaints and I have taken drastic action. Everyone will be completely satisfied by the time you leave here. Airplanenut "cool". (I know he wasn't shown entering the house, but how could this be a "Class" rip-off if he weren't included?). Hall - "Please follow me" as he leads everyone to the long hallway.
He opens the first door on the left and everyone is treated to the sight of a giant (I mean giant) aquarium with assorted fishes and lots of sharks. Hall lifts a large container and starts throwing " finger food" into the tank. The sharks go nuts, thrashing, chomping, devouring and, it seems, even smiling. MadMarty asks "Homerun" what is that finger food that you just fed the sharks?' Homerun - "that, folks, was the fingers of all of the PCGS coin sealers who used to put fingerprints on your coins!" A collective gasp can be heard and many smiles can be seen. Hall - "Follow me, I have more good news"
He opens the first door on the right and there, with a mound of PF JFK's, sits, you guessed it, Russ. Hall - "Russ is our new and only expert grader for PF JFK's" You guys suggested forum members assist with the grading and so they shall." Quickly, other doors are opened and other forum members can be seen grading coins of their specialties - Wondercoin, looking at all sorts of MS 68 and 69 and 70 this and that, PQPeace looking at Morgan and Peace dollars and on and on.
Clankeye is then invited to handle Washington Carvers, but only the ugly mottled ones and Tradedollarnut is asked to grade Proof 1885 Trade dollars, as well as other more common issues. Laura is chosen for 1913 Liberty nickels, of course.
Edited to add: Lucybop will, of course, be in charge of "Frankies" and Braddick, any and all coins grading below Poor 1. Michael (yes, yes, LOL) will grade the pre-1916 DCAM proof coins and Trime, what else? Trimes (silver three cent pieces).
The audience is thrilled but immediately starts arguing about who should be the expert grader in each series. Thankfully, Hall has more good news to share. Another room contains Adrian/Snake and a neat looking computer - he is accompanied by a team of 22 graders, who work frantically to arrive at grades to the nearest 1 millionth of a point - the 3 highest and three lowest graders are excused from the equation and quickly ushered into the shark tank. Yes, Stephanie is there, too, displaying each coin at every conceivable angle.
As Hall is strutting down the hallway (pun intended) quite pleased with himself, someone opens another door and looks inside. Stewart Blay and Shylock are seated side by side at a table upon which rests a coining press. Shylock snaps photos of newly minted 1919 Lincoln cents as Stewart mints them, while grinning broadly and wickedly. Marshall Bear, among others, is a witness and calls everyone in to see the skullduggery.
Part lll? If part ll bombs like Part l did, probably not, but there is more to this story, including a surprise ending....
Edited to add: DISCLAIMER: This is a work of fiction. Names and characters (including dogs, bears and other animals) are part of this author's imagination and/or are used facetiously. Any resemblances to actual persons or animals is (possibly) coincidental.
Acknowledgments : This would not have been possible without the help of you, the forum members, both those mentioned in these stories as well as many, not named or included. A special thank you to Sir Clankeye, who has inspired me with his great sense of humor, gentle ways and exceptional writing. Any good that is found in my stories comes form you, the forum members - thank you.
Now, on to the story:
When we last left off with part l:
"The invitees begin to arrive in tight armor suits, provided, of course by Sir Clankeye and Accugrade.
Greg M. arrives, hand in hand with The LEGENDary Laura, otherwise known as "Little Miss Know-it-all", Tradedollarnut, a bear, some dogs, some mongrels, weasels, self anointed expert graders and lots of body bags.The gong sounds and Homerunhall, alias, the Wizard, gingerly and on tiptoes, approaches the door
PART 2
The door slowly creaks open and the invitees are astonished to see a frailer looking, much thinner Homrunhall before them. He is carrying a Bower-less & Merena-less catalog, some note paper, a miniature tape recorder and a bunch of pins.
Homerunhall - "Greetings all, please come in you asses, sorry, I meant, watch your asses, the house is freshly painted."
One by one, the forum members make their way through the door. Among others, not mentioned previously, are Bulldog, looking much like his icon and repeatedly mumbling "to the top"; dog97, a near twin to Bulldog; Lucybop, dressed as goldilocks, though arm in arm with only Marshall Bear and not the three bears; a bunch of funny looking guys in cowboy outfits, with the word "posse" on their shirt pockets; King Art-r Clankeye in his finest royal regalia (behind him, a mass of would-be writers looking for him to sign autographs); Cameron with a girlfriend on arm (not sure if it's the one he mentioned months ago or if this is a new "flame"); a bunch of guys dressed as doctors, carrying bottles and containers of unknown substances; and, as mentioned previously, Greg M, hand in hand with The LEGENDary Laura, otherwise known as "Little Miss Know-it-all", Tradedollarnut, a bear, some dogs, some mongrels, weasels, self anointed expert graders and lots of body bags. There are many others, who might be mentioned if there is a part lll.
Mike Storeim tries to enter along with the others but is quickly asked to leave. Homerunhall - "Mike, the invitation specifically said "no expert graders allowed". Coinguy1, who was behind Storeim starts to turn around to leave but has a change of heart and walks through the door muttering "I used to grade at NGC - surely I'm allowed in - I'm no expert grader". Homerunhall smirks and says "welcome, ass, I mean watch your ass, the house is freshly painted."
The house is as strange as one might expect, considering, well, you know. There is a massive round living room but beyond that, just a single, long hallway with 10 doors on each side. They are not freshly painted, by the way!
Homerunhall to his guests "you folks are going to be so happy with me and PCGS. I have listened to all of your questions, concerns and complaints and I have taken drastic action. Everyone will be completely satisfied by the time you leave here. Airplanenut "cool". (I know he wasn't shown entering the house, but how could this be a "Class" rip-off if he weren't included?). Hall - "Please follow me" as he leads everyone to the long hallway.
He opens the first door on the left and everyone is treated to the sight of a giant (I mean giant) aquarium with assorted fishes and lots of sharks. Hall lifts a large container and starts throwing " finger food" into the tank. The sharks go nuts, thrashing, chomping, devouring and, it seems, even smiling. MadMarty asks "Homerun" what is that finger food that you just fed the sharks?' Homerun - "that, folks, was the fingers of all of the PCGS coin sealers who used to put fingerprints on your coins!" A collective gasp can be heard and many smiles can be seen. Hall - "Follow me, I have more good news"
He opens the first door on the right and there, with a mound of PF JFK's, sits, you guessed it, Russ. Hall - "Russ is our new and only expert grader for PF JFK's" You guys suggested forum members assist with the grading and so they shall." Quickly, other doors are opened and other forum members can be seen grading coins of their specialties - Wondercoin, looking at all sorts of MS 68 and 69 and 70 this and that, PQPeace looking at Morgan and Peace dollars and on and on.
Clankeye is then invited to handle Washington Carvers, but only the ugly mottled ones and Tradedollarnut is asked to grade Proof 1885 Trade dollars, as well as other more common issues. Laura is chosen for 1913 Liberty nickels, of course.
Edited to add: Lucybop will, of course, be in charge of "Frankies" and Braddick, any and all coins grading below Poor 1. Michael (yes, yes, LOL) will grade the pre-1916 DCAM proof coins and Trime, what else? Trimes (silver three cent pieces).
The audience is thrilled but immediately starts arguing about who should be the expert grader in each series. Thankfully, Hall has more good news to share. Another room contains Adrian/Snake and a neat looking computer - he is accompanied by a team of 22 graders, who work frantically to arrive at grades to the nearest 1 millionth of a point - the 3 highest and three lowest graders are excused from the equation and quickly ushered into the shark tank. Yes, Stephanie is there, too, displaying each coin at every conceivable angle.
As Hall is strutting down the hallway (pun intended) quite pleased with himself, someone opens another door and looks inside. Stewart Blay and Shylock are seated side by side at a table upon which rests a coining press. Shylock snaps photos of newly minted 1919 Lincoln cents as Stewart mints them, while grinning broadly and wickedly. Marshall Bear, among others, is a witness and calls everyone in to see the skullduggery.
Part lll? If part ll bombs like Part l did, probably not, but there is more to this story, including a surprise ending....
0
Comments
Love it........but is Clank working with you??
Larry (PQPeace is gonna love this!)
Patiently waiting for part three!
Check out my PQ selection of Morgan & Peace Dollars, and more at:
WWW.PQDOLLARS.COM or WWW.GILBERTCOINS.COM
"OFF WITH THE DIGITS!"
For some reason I have this feeling that this is an episode of the twilight zone and the house, with its massive round living room is really an alien spacecraft hired by homerun to transport the forum into the vacuum of space. One way ticket, though. And as it happens, he'll be laughing to himself saying, "the grades are going through the roof now!"
--------
Howdy from Houston...
Can't keep my eyes
from the circling skies
Tongue tied and twisted
Just an earthbound misfit,
I
">my registry set
<< <i> Throw Dorkkarls liver to the sharks!!!! >>
With some pearl onions?
Total Copper Nutcase - African, British Ships, Channel Islands!!!
'Do not meddle in the affairs of dragons, for you are crunchy and taste good with ketchup'
You must finish what you started.
Joe.
in our midst.
Camelot
I'm going out right now to buy another 3 ring binder so I can have a "hard copy". I'll put yours right next to Clank's in my library. I forgot about bombs? Dang the bombs, full speed ahead! You do look a little like Rod Sterling you know! Anxiously awaiting part III.
Regards,
Wayne
P.S. I have some questions. What kind of lasagna? How soon do we eat? Is HRH buying the wine? Can you get Buffy the Vampire Slayer to slay the vampire that is biting the necks of all the 1925-P Mercury dimes?
Wayne
www.waynedriskillminiatures.com
my hotels
We'll use our hands and hearts and if we must we'll use our heads.
It's a hit!! It's got "legs." Should run for years off Broadway.
There has to be a part III, absolutely no ducking out. You finish what you start around here.
In your story and on the forum I truly think the phrase "The inmates are running the asylum" is pretty apt.
Write on, oh tubular one! Write on!
Clankeye
(BTW how's the new job at Louie's Coins and Party Favors? I hear Louie is kind of a tyrant.)
<< <i>It's a hit!! It's got "legs." Should run for years off Broadway. >>
Especially since they're all on strike!
I'm hooked
My Website
"Everything I have is for sale except for my wife and my dog....and I'm not sure about one of them."
Joe
I hope the next chapter includes the fact that everyone now gets the grade they request (Kinda like some other services) so that there are no more complaints... and, I guess everyone will live happily ever after?, even that "know it all".
Great story!
Dan
and it sets us apart from practitioners and consultants. Gregor
09/07/2006