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BASEagle
Posts: 383
An eager coin collector and a dealer chance to meet,
While waiting for a cable car upon a city street;
Why, said the former did my bid not get the cent you sold
To skinflint for a lower price, as I have since been told?
Why, said the latter, did you get a discount on the dime
To sell another in the trade? You have cheek sublime.
You are a double dealing fraud, the hot collector cried
A liar and a swindler and a perfect hog beside.
You overrate your pieces and all your patrons fleece
And treat them when they trust you as you would a flock of geese.
At this the dealer answered, You’re a scoundrel and a fool.
You know no more of values than a little boy at school.
You change the pieces sent you and for months you never pay
And circulate such falsehoods as will drive my trade away.
Ah ha, said the collector, of this foulness you’ll repent,
My duplicate half dollar ‘96 will now be sent
Straight to another dealer and you’ll never have a chance
To buy it for your customer at that proposed advance.
And I have found you out in time, the dealer made reply,
The 1802 half dime you need I chanced today to buy
And Dumps, who badly wanted it, shall have it now instead.
What, by the way, was I to be for that half dollar bled?
Well, murmured the collector, I forget the price I made.
If you’ve the half dime with you, perhaps we can make a trade.
Yes, it is quite a decent piece, but really, I would lose
By the exchange. Oh nonsense, said the dealer, I’d refuse
To give our old half dollar any worth akin to this.
Come, it is now or never, said the other, will you miss?
Well, seeing you’re a friend of mine, the dealer said, I think
We’ll make the trade. The customer responded, Have a drink
And then, for full a month of more, each man was heard to say
The other was a gentleman and trustful every way.
A G Heaton, 1896
Copied from "Virgil Brand: The Man and His Era" by Q David Bowers
While waiting for a cable car upon a city street;
Why, said the former did my bid not get the cent you sold
To skinflint for a lower price, as I have since been told?
Why, said the latter, did you get a discount on the dime
To sell another in the trade? You have cheek sublime.
You are a double dealing fraud, the hot collector cried
A liar and a swindler and a perfect hog beside.
You overrate your pieces and all your patrons fleece
And treat them when they trust you as you would a flock of geese.
At this the dealer answered, You’re a scoundrel and a fool.
You know no more of values than a little boy at school.
You change the pieces sent you and for months you never pay
And circulate such falsehoods as will drive my trade away.
Ah ha, said the collector, of this foulness you’ll repent,
My duplicate half dollar ‘96 will now be sent
Straight to another dealer and you’ll never have a chance
To buy it for your customer at that proposed advance.
And I have found you out in time, the dealer made reply,
The 1802 half dime you need I chanced today to buy
And Dumps, who badly wanted it, shall have it now instead.
What, by the way, was I to be for that half dollar bled?
Well, murmured the collector, I forget the price I made.
If you’ve the half dime with you, perhaps we can make a trade.
Yes, it is quite a decent piece, but really, I would lose
By the exchange. Oh nonsense, said the dealer, I’d refuse
To give our old half dollar any worth akin to this.
Come, it is now or never, said the other, will you miss?
Well, seeing you’re a friend of mine, the dealer said, I think
We’ll make the trade. The customer responded, Have a drink
And then, for full a month of more, each man was heard to say
The other was a gentleman and trustful every way.
A G Heaton, 1896
Copied from "Virgil Brand: The Man and His Era" by Q David Bowers
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