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NFL parody of the "Five Love Languages."

keetskeets Posts: 25,351 ✭✭✭✭✭

I got this from my Daughter, thought it would strike a humorous note with everyone since the NFL season is upon us. It was sent with the Browns in mind but pick the ________ and I'm sure it'll work for you. We watch the games together but some members will no doubt have wives or girl-friends suffering from separation anxiety in the coming weeks.

Al H.

Comments

  • thisistheshowthisistheshow Posts: 9,386 ✭✭✭✭✭

    Unless my oldest son happens to be home at the time, there is no one else in my house who enjoys watching football. I will still ask my other two kids and my wife to sit down and watch sports, but they are not interested.

  • doubledragondoubledragon Posts: 23,269 ✭✭✭✭✭

    My wife hates football, she would rather watch those garbage Bachelor shows and Americas got talent shows, I hate Simon Cowell, hate him!

  • thisistheshowthisistheshow Posts: 9,386 ✭✭✭✭✭

    @doubledragon said:
    My wife hates football, she would rather watch those garbage Bachelor shows and Americas got talent shows, I hate Simon Cowell, hate him!

    ..............
    My wife is just not interested in football, but we have been married so long that she knows some things and will comment during the games as she walks by. But her comments will be sort of comical, like she'll ask who s playing, and she will say about one of the teams "They're not going to win, they never win".

    My wife is fully up on the Patriots/Belichick/Brady separation drama and I will discuss that with her. She is Brazilian like Gisele and there is some interesting conversation regarding different matters,

  • doubledragondoubledragon Posts: 23,269 ✭✭✭✭✭

    @thisistheshow said:

    @doubledragon said:
    My wife hates football, she would rather watch those garbage Bachelor shows and Americas got talent shows, I hate Simon Cowell, hate him!

    ..............
    My wife is just not interested in football, but we have been married so long that she knows some things and will comment during the games as she walks by. But her comments will be sort of comical, like she'll ask who s playing, and she will say about one of the teams "They're not going to win, they never win".

    My wife is fully up on the Patriots/Belichick/Brady separation drama and I will discuss that with her. She is Brazilian like Gisele and there is some interesting conversation regarding different matters,

    My wife knows about the Tom and Gisele, she also knows who Aaron Rodgers is because I'm always posting stuff on here about him and laughing. She'll say, "what are you laughing about, Aaron Rodgers?"

  • HydrantHydrant Posts: 7,773 ✭✭✭✭✭
    edited September 4, 2021 10:30AM

    The Lovely Mrs. Hydrant is a football fanatic. She wears a Rams jersey, Rams shoes, a Rams jacket, carries a Rams purse, decks herself out with a Rams necklace, Rams earrings, has several Rams hats, and...oh, well, you get the picture. Among her other talents she is a famous fabric artist! A national treasure! So.....she creates fabulous (?) designer Ram themed clothing for ME!......shirts, pants, ponchos, the works!....She takes great pride when crowds of women clamor to have their picture taken with me at the games! 'Cause Every Girls Crazy 'Bout A Sharp Dressed Man.........But......one young lady took it a little too far at the Rams/Chargers game. She told me that she "LOVED" my shirt..... and wanted it! So....naturally, being the generous fellow that I am, I told her o.k. and began unbuttoning. Things would have gone smoothly except the young lady in question wanted to make it a fair exchange, so she started to remove her shirt to give it to me! Aahhhhh! That's when our budding affair caught the eye of The Lovely Mrs. Hydrant who became suddenly not her lovely self. "WHAT ARE YOU TWO DOING!" she said. "I'm giving her my shirt and she's giving me hers." I replied. She shot back, " YOU ARE NOT GIVING HER THAT SHIRT!". So I didn't. .....The last words I heard that night before drifting off into dream land...."Are you always going to be my Wild Child?" That young lady was a looker! Oh well, maybe next time.

  • galaxy27galaxy27 Posts: 7,756 ✭✭✭✭✭
    edited September 4, 2021 11:43AM

    food, fights, affairs

    serious question -- when you go to SoFi does an actual game take place?

    you'll never be able to outrun a bad diet

  • HydrantHydrant Posts: 7,773 ✭✭✭✭✭
    edited September 4, 2021 7:30PM

    @galaxy27 said:
    food, fights, affairs

    serious question -- when you go to SoFi does an actual game take place?

    So far.....no.

  • HydrantHydrant Posts: 7,773 ✭✭✭✭✭
    edited September 4, 2021 7:33PM

    Later.

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