Three fans were bemoaning the sorry state of their football team.
“I blame the general manager,” said the first fan from San Francisco. “If he signed better players, we’d be a great team.”
“I blame the players,” said the second fan from Buffalo. “If they made more of an effort and had fewer turnovers, we’d score some points.”
“I blame my parents,” said the third from Cleveland. “If I’d been born in Seattle, I’d be supporting a decent team.”
Mike walked into a post office just before Valentine’s Day, he couldn't help noticing a middle-aged, balding man standing in a corner sticking "Love" stamps on bright pink envelopes with hearts all over them. Then the man got out a bottle of Channel perfume from his pocket and started spraying scent over the envelopes.
By now Mike's curiosity had got the better of him, and so I asked the man why he was sending all those cards. The man replied, "I'm sending out 500 Valentine cards signed, 'Guess who?'"
"But why?" asked Mike.
"I'm a divorce lawyer," the man replied.
Einstein dies and goes to heaven
He is informed upon arrival that his room is not yet ready.
"I hope you will not mind waiting in a dormitory. We are very sorry, but it is the best we can do, and you will have to share the room with others," the doorman, Clyde, tells him. Einstein says that is perfectly fine and there isn't any need for a big fuss. So, Clyde leads him to the dorm where Einstein is introduced to the current residents.
"Well, here is your first roommate, he has an IQ of 180!"
"Why that's splendid!" exclaims Einstein, "we can discuss literature!"
"And here is your second roommate, she has an IQ of 150!"
"What fun!" exclaims Einstein, "we can discuss mathematics!"
"Meet your third roommate, his IQ is 100!"
"Jolly good!" exclaims Einstein, "we can discuss the latest plays showing at the theatre!"
Just then another gentleman comes up to greet Einstein and shake his hand, "I'm your last roommate, and I wanted to apologize in advance, my IQ is only 80."
Einstein smiles back at him and inquires, "So, where do you think interest rates are headed?"
Comments
USN & USAF retired 1971-1993
Successful Transactions with more than 100 Members
USN & USAF retired 1971-1993
Successful Transactions with more than 100 Members
USN & USAF retired 1971-1993
Successful Transactions with more than 100 Members
USN & USAF retired 1971-1993
Successful Transactions with more than 100 Members
USN & USAF retired 1971-1993
Successful Transactions with more than 100 Members
FOUND the fork, just need to find the spoon and knife.
USN & USAF retired 1971-1993
Successful Transactions with more than 100 Members
USN & USAF retired 1971-1993
Successful Transactions with more than 100 Members
USN & USAF retired 1971-1993
Successful Transactions with more than 100 Members
USN & USAF retired 1971-1993
Successful Transactions with more than 100 Members
USN & USAF retired 1971-1993
Successful Transactions with more than 100 Members
USN & USAF retired 1971-1993
Successful Transactions with more than 100 Members
USN & USAF retired 1971-1993
Successful Transactions with more than 100 Members
Today in 1990...
USN & USAF retired 1971-1993
Successful Transactions with more than 100 Members
USN & USAF retired 1971-1993
Successful Transactions with more than 100 Members
USN & USAF retired 1971-1993
Successful Transactions with more than 100 Members
USN & USAF retired 1971-1993
Successful Transactions with more than 100 Members
USN & USAF retired 1971-1993
Successful Transactions with more than 100 Members
USN & USAF retired 1971-1993
Successful Transactions with more than 100 Members
USN & USAF retired 1971-1993
Successful Transactions with more than 100 Members
USN & USAF retired 1971-1993
Successful Transactions with more than 100 Members
USN & USAF retired 1971-1993
Successful Transactions with more than 100 Members
Three fans were bemoaning the sorry state of their football team.
“I blame the general manager,” said the first fan from San Francisco. “If he signed better players, we’d be a great team.”
“I blame the players,” said the second fan from Buffalo. “If they made more of an effort and had fewer turnovers, we’d score some points.”
“I blame my parents,” said the third from Cleveland. “If I’d been born in Seattle, I’d be supporting a decent team.”
Mike walked into a post office just before Valentine’s Day, he couldn't help noticing a middle-aged, balding man standing in a corner sticking "Love" stamps on bright pink envelopes with hearts all over them. Then the man got out a bottle of Channel perfume from his pocket and started spraying scent over the envelopes.
By now Mike's curiosity had got the better of him, and so I asked the man why he was sending all those cards. The man replied, "I'm sending out 500 Valentine cards signed, 'Guess who?'"
"But why?" asked Mike.
"I'm a divorce lawyer," the man replied.
Einstein dies and goes to heaven
He is informed upon arrival that his room is not yet ready.
"I hope you will not mind waiting in a dormitory. We are very sorry, but it is the best we can do, and you will have to share the room with others," the doorman, Clyde, tells him. Einstein says that is perfectly fine and there isn't any need for a big fuss. So, Clyde leads him to the dorm where Einstein is introduced to the current residents.
"Well, here is your first roommate, he has an IQ of 180!"
"Why that's splendid!" exclaims Einstein, "we can discuss literature!"
"And here is your second roommate, she has an IQ of 150!"
"What fun!" exclaims Einstein, "we can discuss mathematics!"
"Meet your third roommate, his IQ is 100!"
"Jolly good!" exclaims Einstein, "we can discuss the latest plays showing at the theatre!"
Just then another gentleman comes up to greet Einstein and shake his hand, "I'm your last roommate, and I wanted to apologize in advance, my IQ is only 80."
Einstein smiles back at him and inquires, "So, where do you think interest rates are headed?"
USN & USAF retired 1971-1993
Successful Transactions with more than 100 Members
USN & USAF retired 1971-1993
Successful Transactions with more than 100 Members
USN & USAF retired 1971-1993
Successful Transactions with more than 100 Members
USN & USAF retired 1971-1993
Successful Transactions with more than 100 Members
USN & USAF retired 1971-1993
Successful Transactions with more than 100 Members
USN & USAF retired 1971-1993
Successful Transactions with more than 100 Members
USN & USAF retired 1971-1993
Successful Transactions with more than 100 Members
USN & USAF retired 1971-1993
Successful Transactions with more than 100 Members
USN & USAF retired 1971-1993
Successful Transactions with more than 100 Members
USN & USAF retired 1971-1993
Successful Transactions with more than 100 Members
USN & USAF retired 1971-1993
Successful Transactions with more than 100 Members
USN & USAF retired 1971-1993
Successful Transactions with more than 100 Members