A Cynic's Dictionary of Numismatics

MrEureka · October 13, 2008 5:06AM

"A dirty mind is better than no mind at all.
A clean mind is the result of brainwashing."
-Walter Breen, The Cynic's Dictionary

Walter Breen may have been the first numismatist to create a "cynic's dictionary", but we can be the first to create a numismatic version.

I'll start:

Investment Quality - No collector would ever pay the price.

Third Party Grading - The best option when the first two parties don't know how to grade.

keets · October 13, 2008 5:07AM

undervalued-----low demand.

Longacre · October 13, 2008 5:15AM

"Lightly cleaned, generations ago"-- still an obvious cleaning, and we have no clue when the coin was cleaned

longtimecollector · October 13, 2008 7:01AM

Mint sealed = Really common widgets that we can sell at 50 over ask = Crapshoot

Elcontador · October 13, 2008 7:13AM

PQ - I think I can get more money for the coin from a collector than it's worth

"A dirty mind is better than no mind at all." Coming from Walter Breen, I don't know whether that's more sick or funny.

291fifth · October 13, 2008 7:16AM

"market acceptable" - I've got to find the greater fool who actually believes it is!

drwstr123 · October 13, 2008 7:41AM

"Registry Quality"- this coin is for those of you who don't have a Registry.

CalGold · October 13, 2008 8:38AM

For the advanced collector.... Available at a staggering price.

Well worth owning....Would have been a nice coin if not for the enumerated flaws.

Close inspection under a glass reveals…. ... Coin has heavy bag marks or scratches.

Richly toned... Dark as night

CG

fc · October 13, 2008 8:53AM

heh, i like that advanced collector one. i always thought that was humorous.

"totally original" - 100% sure it is really a US minted coin. not counterfeit or a copy.

(only god knows how the word original got warped to mean what it
does in numis. go check the dictionary...)

fc · October 13, 2008 8:57AM

"surviving population" - a guess pulled out of my butt, invariably too low and time shows it as wrong most of the time.

"processed" - what happens to coins that other dealers sell.

"fresh" - the first time the dealer selling it has offered it for sale.

"sleeper" - a coin in a series most people detest.

"mottled" - spotty.

LickThoseStamps · October 13, 2008 9:03AM

MS69 - An MS70 coin that was submitted when the graders were having a bad day.

MrEureka · October 13, 2008 9:08AM

Layaway Plan Available: It's not like this coin was going anywhere anytime soon.

Swampboy · October 13, 2008 9:15AM

Let me check and see how much I'm into it" - Let me size you up and guess how much I can get out of you.

Coinosaurus · October 13, 2008 9:37AM

"Commercial Unc" - AU at best and more likely EF

"light finger mark" - bold thumbprint

"PQ" - average

TwoSides2aCoin · October 13, 2008 9:47AM

Modern Rarity

: spot price without the plastic.

kranky · October 13, 2008 9:49AM

"conditional rarity" = common as dirt, but not with this slab label
"virtually unobtainable" = actually obtainable
"average circulated" = by "average", we mean the most worn 5% of existing examples
"rare opportunity" = haven't had one in stock for a week
"strong interest" = people call to ask the price, then laugh and hang up
"collector's item" = not a collector's item
"investor lot" = we're buried in these

MikeInFL · October 13, 2008 9:53AM

Finest Known - Ovepriced and probably overgraded too.

GoldenEyeNumismatics · October 13, 2008 9:54AM

"My camera's in the shop for repairs" --- I'm trying to sell a piece of crap, but still want strong money for it.

IGWT · October 13, 2008 10:20AM

Ethics: Rules that apply to the other person

NHSBaseball · October 13, 2008 10:27AM

"Soap and watered"- Ajax and club soda'd

CarlWohlforth · October 13, 2008 10:28AM

"Cameo but not so labeled" or "some Cameo contrast" - Gee those devices really catch the light well, bring out more proofs for me to photograph before I move the lights!

Hey this thread gets my vote for the best ever MrEureka thread! I'd love to condense it and put it on my website... Can I do that? Who owns this thread? Wait! I have to stop asking questions or I might become a wannabe Longacre.

MisterBungle · October 13, 2008 10:32AM

"LQQK" = A complete waste of time to look.

"Upgrade Candidate" = A coin that is lucky to be graded as high as it is now.

"Slight Rub" = F12

"Undergraded" = Overgraded

~

MikeInFL · October 13, 2008 10:42AM

OGH - So obviously overgraded nobody has taken the chance on it.

Aegis3 · October 13, 2008 10:48AM

PQ = for sale
pedigree mark = gash
pop top = thousands at least just as nice
POR = price obscene & ridiculous
proof, branch mint = not a proof
specimen = fancy name for proof, branch mint & similar items
monster coin = as attractive as Medusa
slabbed = overgraded
undergraded = overgraded
correctly graded = overgraded
sticker worthy = overgraded
overgraded = really overgraded
market acceptable = acceptable for me to sell, not buy
slab = what investors are buried in (not my definition, John Wright's instead IIRC)

MikeInFL · October 13, 2008 10:51AM

Pedigreed to the XXX collection - Even the best owned some crappy coins.

Edscoin · October 13, 2008 10:52AM

TOP POP Modern = The other 10,000 has not been slabed yet!

bidask · October 13, 2008 10:53AM

smashed new record price........2 bidders

Walmann · October 13, 2008 10:58AM

collector's edition-colorized or plated or in some cases overly massed produced coins that most true collectors ignore (generally any product labeled collector's edition is not very collectable)

Edscoin · October 13, 2008 10:59AM

<< smashed new record price........2 bidders >>

Ever heard the old saying--- When two Fools meet ?

bidask · October 13, 2008 11:07AM

<< 

<< smashed new record price........2 bidders >>

Ever heard the old saying--- When two Fools meet ? >>

yep, I wonder how many new record priced coins are out there as a result of 2 bidders?

Connecticoin · October 13, 2008 11:11AM

<< Finest Known - Ovepriced and probably overgraded too. >>

Finest Known = Maxxed Out in current holder

Connecticoin · October 13, 2008 11:25AM

Omaha Bank Hoard = Overgraded
Wells Fargo Hoard = Overgraded
Jules Reiver Pedigree = Problem coin in non-problem NGC holder
Jules Verne Pedigree = "Shipwreck Effect"
"Shipwreck Effect" = Silver Half Dollar scrubbed to death by NCS with a Brillo Pad
Original Surfaces = Nicely dressed with Blue Ribbon or Deller's Darkener
OGH = Overgraded Holder
"Fatty" = Overgraded Holder
"Rattler" = Overpriced Holder
CAC = Coin Already Certified
Rare = Common as Dirt
Crusty = Ugly
Wholly Original = Cleaned and re-toned
MS62 = AU58 (Bust Halves)
MS61 = AU55 (Bust Halves)
MS60 = Cleaned/Bodybag (Bust Halves)
Redfield Hoard Mint State 65 = MS62
Redfield Hoard Mint State 60 = MS62

TwoSides2aCoin · October 13, 2008 11:35AM

<< Pedigreed to the XXX collection - Even the best owned some crappy coins. >>

GoldenEyeNumismatics · October 13, 2008 12:10PM

<< 
Redfield Hoard Mint State 65 = MS62
Redfield Hoard Mint State 60 = MS62 >>

ROFL!!

MrEureka · October 13, 2008 12:29PM

Russet Toning - Probably baked in a potato.

MikeInFL · October 13, 2008 12:31PM

NGC Grade = PCGS grade - 1

MikeInFL · October 13, 2008 12:32PM

Even chocolate color - Recolored copper.

Man, I didn't know I was this cynical.... Good topic, Andy, I think...

MikeInFL · October 13, 2008 12:34PM

Hard Smooth Surfaces - Brushed a thousand times.

coinpictures · October 13, 2008 5:42PM

"CAC stickered" = I fell for the idiocy, and am hoping to make an extra 30%.

thezookrew · October 14, 2008 5:33AM

From an Estate Sale - These have been picked over by me AND 5 of my closest friends
Unsearched lot - I haven't PERSONALLY searched through them, but my dealer buddies have!!

pERRY

ziggy29 · October 14, 2008 5:54AM

FA-02 = keep it in your pocket for a year and slab it
"Rarer than an 1893-S Morgan at a fraction of the price" = No one cares about collecting this type by date and mint
"Only one certified in this condition" = someone had to burn some grading coupons on VF Zincolns before they expired
"Grandpa's attic" = senile old guy hoarding junk in the toolshed outside
"Prestige set" = same coins at twice the price for the packaging
L@@K = "I want to be excluded from saved eBay searches"

Longacre · October 14, 2008 5:57AM

"A coin for the contrarians"-- this market is so dead, you'd be a fool to buy it.

fc · October 14, 2008 6:42AM

"dealer relationship" - i spend money on coins and that is why i have
a relationship that i warp into something more then it is. once the money is gone the relationship ceases to exist in most cases.

MrEureka · October 14, 2008 7:45AM

"Sorry You Missed This Bargain!" - "If I had any hope at all that the piece that was here might have sold at my ridiculous price, I would have brought another one to fill this hole in my showcase."

IGWT · October 14, 2008 10:04AM

Try our want list service!: Confirm that we don't think you're worth dealing with.

57loaded · October 14, 2008 10:29AM

"problem free" = it hopefully will pass muster with my 3 day return policy

Dentuck · October 14, 2008 10:42AM

Sealed bag of dateless and partial date Buffalos = "I saw a 19 in there somewhere"

adamlaneus · October 14, 2008 10:48AM

"Use MSN Live Search"

translation

"This coin is overpriced by exactly 30%."

CoinJunkie · October 14, 2008 10:51AM

Look at the pictures and judge for yourself - Coin was photographed to hide obvious flaws
No returns: Grade is guaranteed by the TPG - Lock downgrade
No problems that I can see - Did I mention I'm legally blind?
Finest one I've seen - Only one I've seen
This coin is from my personal collection - .....of mistake purchases

COALPORTER · October 14, 2008 11:03AM

Rare Die Marriage = marketing of crusty crap priced at moon money.

ziggy29 · October 14, 2008 10:21PM

"I am not a coin collector" -- "I know I'm overgrading and overhyping this coin, but I'm hiding behind feigned ignorance to sell you a lemon. Oh yeah, and all sales are final."

A Cynic's Dictionary of Numismatics

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